OKay so here it goes....(long)

Discussion in 'Sex, Love & Relationships' started by gallery piece, Feb 10, 2009.

  1. #1 gallery piece, Feb 10, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 10, 2009
    I am a straight woman although, I've never ruled out the possiblity of fallin in love with a woman, i never considered myself a lesbian cause i am still attracted to men, and never really considered myself a bi-sexual cause there are only few woman i am or have been attracted to. ((I've been involved with two women in my life))But I recently figured out I am in love with my bestfriend ( we are both 20 ). Her aand I have kissed before once when we were drunk and another time while we were rolling, and she has been with women before (had a 3 some in highschool with two of my other friends, would have been a foursome i was invited but i decline) but she refers to that as silly high school stuff. She doesnt rule out the possibility of fallin in love with another woman either.

    The connection that her and i have is far beyond anythign i have ever experienced, and she feels the same way. She knows me better than anyone else and is the only person i can let my gaurd down with and share everything, and she same thing ggoes for her. Alot of our very good friends are lesbians and so is her older sister, and they always tell us that one day were going to be like 50 years old and realize that were in love with each other cause of the connection we have. We've had conversations about the possibilities of fallin in love with women and she always says if she ever meets a woman she can conect with in all levels she would probaby go for itl. I want to tell her how i feel so bad i can barely be myself around her anymore, part of me knows i should, but the other part is scared she'll push me out of her life and feel werid around me. I know this cause one of our mutual bestfriends is a lesbian and has a huge crush on her and when she told her my friend felt odd around her even though this girl was one of our really good friends.

    And to make things worse she recently got a boyfriend who is totally non deserving of her, he just uses her cause she is convinient for him. He is WAY older than her (i think he is 29) and treats her like shit and just uses her as a ride from his parents house ((where he lives)) to work, for sex and food. And she started bringin him over to her house, which is where i spend most of my time cause 2 other ppl who live in the house are my bestfriends too, and in the night time when i sleep over i have to hear them fucking in the other room, and that really makes me want to tell her even more, cause i want to be the person that touches her and kisses her and holds her. I dont know if i should tell her or not, part of me thinks she feels the same way about me but i dont really know. Her boyfriend influences alot of what she does now-adays so if i tell her how i feel she'll probably tell him and he'll tellher to stop talking to me. I'm very confused. This is the bestfriend ship i've ever had and i dont want to risk losing it. I know if she tells me she doesnt feel the same way i'll get over it but inorder for her to say that i have to tell her. Advice anyone?

    This isn't my real GC account i had to make another one cause my friend and her boyfriend both use this site aswell.
     
  2. Hopefully if you two are good friends she won't distance herself when you tell her how you feel about her, like she did to the other girl. I think you'd be better off to just lay it all on the line. Don't go through life always thinking about what could have, should have or would have been. If she distances herself from you cause you have a crush, then is she really a good friend anyway? Spilling your heart out won't be comfortable or easy but anything that comes easy isn't worth keeping. As far as your crushe's boyfriend, just remind her that the loser is 29 and still lives in mommy's basement lol.
     
  3. that.... is a toughy.
    i'm not really sure what advice to give.
    i know what i'd do in your situation,
    but i don't know if it would be best.
     
  4. i know what i want to do but.... i dont know ... ugh life lol....

    and to add wood ot the fire she just came over to my house and we were talkign and she told me she is in love with her loser boyfriend.. ghey shit
     
  5. i refuse to believe only two people in the city are willing to shine some light ont he situtation :/
     
  6. my advice to you is dont tell her straight off the bat. Talk to her about somethign more or less around the lines and ask her in a subtle manner if she ever thinks you guys would be more than jsut friends, depending on her reaction to the question and on the answer she gives you you will be able to determien if you shoudl tell her or not. If you guys are infact as close as you describe in your post then you shoudl have no problem reading her.

    if not fuck it, hand her your heart and hope for the best.
     
  7. hmmmmm...
    if i was you, i'd go with my gut and tell her!
    you seem to be pretty sure about the way that you feel.

    GL!
     
  8. i think you should tell her but first dip your toes in the water and see where shes at. or maybe since you guys fooled around a couple times already while being drunk and on e/molly the next time you guys are a little tipsy or high hit on her and fool around again. perhaps one thing will lead to another and the rest will be history
     
  9. I guess I'll be the first, and probably the only, to tell you to just take a back seat and respect the fact that she has a boyfriend. not everyone gets what they want, and sooner or later when nothing happens between you two you will move on and have feelings for someone else

    even if the guy is a low life asshole, she still chooses to be with him over trying you and it really isn't your place to change that. if this guy is as bad as you make him out to be she will somehow realize one day that she's better than that.

    infatuation is a bitch.
     
  10. ALthough i do believe this is more than just a silly infatuation, thats actually what i plan on doing, I'm just going to leave it be I was hanging out with her today. And i realized i rather keep her as my best friend then start somethign and fuck it up, cause honestly this is the best friendship i have ever had. One like no other. Thanks everyone for all the advice.
     
  11. I really don't know what to tell you... but if something happens please post pics.
     
  12. This man speaks the truth. Maybe you're over thinking it. I'd say test the waters first, talking about a relative topic or something before you throw yourself out there. That being said, I have gone out on limb before and it paid off for me. Another time I pursued a girl I was infatuated with and she blew me off and I realized the attraction was "all in my head".

    You ever seen the movie 25th Hour with Ed Norton? One of Ed's friends is a teacher that has the hots for one of his students. He talks about her all through the movie. Towards the end they're at the club hanging out and the student is there. After much flirting and drinks he kisses the girl. After that she begins to act awkward and he realizes the mistake he has made.

    Tough situation but you have to make sure you don't rush in risking everything on something that isn't really there. If you know in your heart, then go with it; but you have to be sure.
     
  13. #13 TheHighLife, Feb 12, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 12, 2009
    seems like you know what your going to do, I guess its whats best for the friendship. But if anythign does happen let us know I know i'll be curious.
     
  14. where the hell were girls that were down for 3 somes when i was in high school thats wat i want to know
     
  15. i would tell her how you feel. at least this will give her time to think about a relationship if you are planning to try to have one. try to bring back memories with her of times you've seemed to enjoy with her and she what she thinks about those memories. if she doesn't say they are "high school fun" or something on that path, then she probably wouldn't even think twice on a relationship.
     
  16. oh carlton.. haha... but seriously, there is nothing wrong with lesbians. in my opinion we should enbrace lesbians because they cant have kids (with the booming population) and they can addopt kids in need of good parents. they both are female so they understand eachother and usually means less fighting.

    GL with the situation art gallery. i hope the best situation occurs between the 2 of you.:hello:
     
  17. prob should stay friends. don't want to fuck up a really good thing
     

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