Ever go to a bar (or any place surrounded by negativity) and when you leave you can literally tangibly feel the depressing, negative energies of alcoholics and sex fiends floating around your body as you leave? (I know that saying "sex fiends" probably sounds absurd to you, and to me, but I don't have any other way of putting it). This used to happen a few months ago when I would hang out with my friends who are heroin and meth junkies too.... as well as when I would go to certain kinds of parties. As soon as I walk in such places I can literally feel the difference.... it's like being around animals, people who are depressed trying to kill their depression with sex and alcohol. I would notice that everyone would talk and get real excited, and when someone was done talking they would look off to the distance with a sense of longing, of knowing that deep down they are going to be chasing their whole lives for something they will never get. It was sad to say the least. I don't mean to be condescending... I had my share of drug problems, and there was a time it looked like I would end up far worse than these people. Now I have to do a few rituals to banish the negative energies just to feel normal again... unless I want to wait an hour or two for the feeling to leave on its own. I just listened to wasted old alcoholics talk about fucking fat chicks and giving "stinky fingers" to girls, and how they were getting their dicks sucked by prostitutes when they were 9. Ugh.... why the fuck do they think anyone wants to hear that shit lol? I've never had to give so many awkward fake laughs in my entire life. What's interesting is, I hung out with far worse people and did far worse things in the past and never felt anything like this... or perhaps my life was so bad back then I just didn't notice it even though it was always there. It's for reasons like this that I find myself staying in more and more on the weekends... all my friends are junkies, I literally have only 2 friends who don't have a serious drug problem or serious life issue of some sort (to the point where being around them has a destructive impact on me).