My Stories

Heres one hell of a way to come down......
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so theres nate- andrew- me- and tom all up in a 99 honda civic. We had just got back from buying a new Sherlock for me and about a half ounce of weed. Me and drew and tom got through smoking about 6-7 bowls of some really high mids so we were peaking at this point. So we got in the civic after smoking and decided to go to KFC. Im sitting passenger rear. Tom is sitting driver rear. Drew is sitting passenger and nates driving. My window is the only one open and none of us have our seatbelts on. Nate thinking he's god (cause thats nate) decides to do 120 on a back curvy road (speed limit 25) so were all peaking now and nate takes his last corner and its kinda up hill so we cant see whats on the other side. By the time we could see the other side a couple with a brand new just bought JEEP cheroke doing 50 on the wrong side of the road. So nate jamms the steering all the way to the right we get hung up on the dirt he tries to counter steer and we hit a rock wall doing about 110. The rock wall hooked our right front side and we rolled 6-7 times in mid air. During these rolls i was from the waist up outside my window i pulled myself back in and got my skull bashed up against the ceiling 3 times. Right when we hit the wall i got thrown forward sending drews seat in the forward position making drew crack his head against the winshield. I then got thrown through toms window and out of the car being thrown about 50 feet. so when the car stopped moving about 350 feet, 5 mailboxes, 2 trees, and a telephone pole later. Everybody looks around in the car and freaks cause im not there. They rush out of the car and im sitting in the road looking up at the sky without a scratch on me and did so for about 3 minutes. Every single person had a minimum of 14 stitches. Nate broke a collar bone on the steering column, Drew broke his leg and his nose and ripped open his face above his eye, Tom had a concusion and his face was cut up from glass. I was the only one that went home. Broke my sherlock to pieces and ditched my dope before the red and blue light hit me. Never made it to KFC to date and this happened in august. Oh well peace out smoke free.

 

Ok now this is gonna sound really stupid but check it cause its nuts!!

Theres a game i made up called Poke Smot Lot. Two people together have to go find an unlocked car in a parking lot and smoke one full bowl before the person comes out. We have a point system thats like this

Trucks = 5
Pos = 2
Sports = 10
Handicap = 20
Federals = 25

The winner gets a half of dro every week on friday. So it was me and mikes shot up against a couple others from some other smoking groups and them not knowing that i made this game decided to go for the big score. THE MALL. So consecutively me and mike hit about 4 TRUCKS 1 POS
(no sports cause nobody really has anything that nice at the mall) 2 HANDICAPS. So we are tied and we decide to go for the ball busters And head over to the police station where we smoked in 2 police cars and a conviscated Mazda RX-7 which qualifies as a sport car. So as me and mike are smoking our bowl in the 5-0's car he comes out. YIPPY!!!. So me and mike are running as fast as we can side by side (still smoking the bowl as were running away down the road). So about an hour later me and mike are just walking down the main road in town near a store whena police officer goes by doin like 40 in a 20, slams on his brakes kicks it into reverse leaving a massive amount of smoke and starts to chase us again. Mike runs into the woods across the street. I ran forward and backward playing cat and mouse with this cop forever. Stepped on the hood of the car ran over the car and across the street into the woods where i found mike about a half mile in. So we are just walking relaxing when we hear police behind us but far away and what do they have, Dogs. So me being the brillant man i am jump my ass up a straight oak tree thats about 200 feet high and me and mike climbed out asses all the way up. And we sit there for a while when about 15 cops and 3 dogs come walking right below us i mean i could have spit on one of em. Ad what do ya think me and mike are doing up in the tree. YUP SMOKING ANOTHER BOWL.
You bet we got our half though.

 

I dont know if you guys (or gals) have heard this one yet but oh well.


So heres how this happened. It was a real nice kinda night and so me and my half crew of 4 potheads to a one man tent. So we had no place ot put our tent. And to get to where we camped you had to cross about a half. So where walking out in the woods through abut a half a mile of dead thorn bushes now rippin the shiat outta us. And we come to this clearing not too much bigger than most of yas bathrooms, just big enough to fit a 1 man tent in the upper corner and have somebody fall out an pass out cold before the lake we camp aside swallowed you. So were all sittin there with about an oz waiting for it to hit night, when to of the potheads decided to leave.AND THEN THERE WHERE TWO. So me and cookie decide to toke up when we hear the other two potheads yell me name.
"jjjaaAAAYYYyyy",

so im like "wwwhhHHAATTTtttt",

and then they say "gggGGUUEESS wwHHOoo wEEee fOUNddd!"

and i say "WHO YOU FIND POTHEAD?"

and then you hear Toker pauls voice "Jays a bitch"

So now theres me, Toker paul, and the other 3 potheads in a one man tent hot-boxen that shit with an oz. One pothead left and screemed at the top of his lungs "mary if f**cking me in the ass" at the top of is lungs and then passes out cold. So he wakes back up and jumps in the tent, falls on paul, paul throws his across the tent to me, a shoe hit me in the face and i swung at whatever was near me, it flew across the ten and hit joel, only then settling for some good recreational smoking.Suddenly we start to hear stuff. It kinda sounded like a growl but it wasnt. It turned out to be moose. About 7 of em too. Yep it turns out we had camped right in there zone and in a drinkin hole no less. So me and paul and one of the potheads decide to leave. Joel and one of the other potheads decides to stay because joel blew out his knee. So there we are. Paul leading out through complete darkness. If youve ever been up to newhampshire and gone in the woods you know what kind of darkness i mean. But pauls in front using a lighter to see about 2 feet in front of him, Pothead is holding onto his shirt and im about ten feet behind everybody with a machete. So we are making progress when i hear this noise behind me. Like stomping. Suddenly a big ass moose comes rushing out behind me misses me by about 4 inches and takes out a tree next to me. So paul and pothead are already across and i just ran across that swamp freakin the hell out. Ran across some ladies yard through the street over and across a school and down into those woods. So we sat and made ourselfs a fire and smoke the rest of the oz only about a quarter. So we smoked the rest. Right about when we started to trip real bad from sleep dep and dope a bus full of students showed up to work on the place in the woods we camped at (some remake of an indian village). So we ran out of our teepee thing dashed across the river that was 5 feet deep and made it before anybody could see us.

 

Ya know. This isnt important but i fell asleep yesterday at about 3 Pm and woke at at 6 Pm right about when the sun goes down. And i just figured it was the sun coming up and that i slept all day but when i went downstairs my girlfriend was downstairs making dinner and i was like "why are you up?" she just all freaked out and was like "im making supper why where else should i be" i dunno just freaked me out is all......... thats all i got for now.

 

so check this out. Im at locobazooka with few friends and i have about 25 joints in each pocket. So while standin in line i smoke a few of em. Then go on some ride that spins around real fast called the gravitron. So my friend mike has to pop a squat so we walk over to the porto's and im standin in line waiting for him to come back out and i look to the side of me and the drummer from motograter is standin 3 inches to the left of me and he just looks up and im just sitting there with a freshly blazed look on my face and a new joint in my mouth ready to spark it up and he just says "whus up bro"
i was like "high, real high" and just kinda took the joint and put it his way and he took it and lit it up and we just stood there in line smokin a joint, got done before mike got out and he comes out and is like "wheres the joint?" and i just said "gone!" and it kinda started to get misty and everybody cars fogged up and me, mike, and all of the bandmembers from LETDOWN got blitzed and went through the whole parkin lot smokin and writing "nutbags" and covering the door handles with gluesticks. Fun night.

 

Ok so just to get a picture going. . . . theres this road and on a corner there are these 120 ft give or take a few cliffs. And all the way up and about 130 ft back there is this treehouse that we always used to smoke in. I dont anymore but Matt does. So me,mike,nate,and drew go and get some police costumes and a megaphone and one of those novelty video cameras.hehehehehe. So one day matt goes up there to smoke and we knew about it cause he asked me to coem and i said no. So we all go down there in nates car about 7 minutes later. And matt sticks his head in the treehouse ready to smoke and theres this big camera pointed right at his face and he freaks out and smashes it and throws it down the cliff and goes back to smoke all freaked out. So here we come and we slow down the car and he can hear it slowing so matt is kinda like "shhhhhh whats that did you hear that?'
and then we get out and slam the doors and start to walk up the cliffs quietly. So we get to the treehouse and i get on the megaphone and say "get out of the treehouse we know your in there the property owners notified us, get out now" and they screw out down the other side through the woods and where all chasin em for like a half mile when i tackled them and matt is swinging and i threw him to the ground and cuffed him and turned him around and he sees its me and is pissed. I didnt understand why he was so pissed normally he'd just be geekin out but he's swearing and yelling and im like calm down man whats up? and he says "dude what the hell i ate everything i had" i was like so what man good job. He's like it was a little more than a half. Im geekin out now and theres this awful smell and i cant figure out what it was and i guess matt shit himself. But oh well he got high.

 

hey bro you wanna hear the most mind blowin brain tweekin skul crushing eye poppin shroom chompin nail spliting fact.

everything i talk of happened one day in my pathetic meaningless life.

 

ya got rolled up some dank yesterday and decided to go down to the local supermarket all fucked up. so i go in to get a chicken and somehow i ended up walkin out with like 45$ in food. but i dont know why i bought a peach........indeed

 

Later all im off to chomp down some shroomies and go see matrix in imax.