My Poem on a Cynical View of our Society

Discussion in 'General' started by Venomous Puffer, Mar 28, 2007.

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    The guidelines were that it had to be a cynical view of society using characters or themes that are less serious (like animals, which is the approach i took) I had 10 minutes to write this and here is what i came up with. (I didn't have to make it rhyme, but for me it is easier) Btw its kinda twisted haha. Tell me what you think.

    edit: This was for my English class, I forgot to mention that.

    I look far off in the distance
    The ignorant sheep that follow
    When it comes to ignorance, there is no resistance
    And in ignorant bliss they wallow

    I see a sheep out the side of my eye
    That seems to dislike the farm
    The farmer is angry that the sheep defies
    But tries to convince it with charm

    The sheep ignores the lame attempts
    To force a changed opinion
    The farmer does not appear content
    And continues to assert his dominion

    He tries to threaten the harmless sheep
    By yelling with all his breath
    But when he discovers this was an impossible leap
    He beats the sheep to death
  2. That's not bad. I liked the last stanza especially. I would just change the word "lame" to something else and you'll have a damn good 10 minute poem.
  3. When I saw the picture posted above the first thought that popped in my head was The Wall [maybe cause I'm listening to Floyd]. The poem was great too man, I'd say it shows our society perfectly.
  4. That was really good man, I know I couldn't come up with something like that in 10 minutes :hello:
  5. That was a good poem. Cynical it stayed:hello: . Ended like it should have, it had the man win. It's always been like that, so how about posting up the grade you got for this?:smoking:
  6. bravo man. that is spectacular. sooo true too i give you an A+++++rep
  7. thanks you guys :) I got a 100 :p it was only class participation tho haha :D

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