My Friend Got Fucked Up

Hello!

I figured I'd come back with another story from a few years back. This was in the winter
of 2006.

I was out, sick, with a cold. I hadn't been to work in a few days, and was taking it
easy at home. Part of my nightly routine to break the cold was to take a long hot bath
around 10:30pm. Well I also like to smoke a joint while I bathe, so I brought one
along.

I had smoked the joint about halfway and had a great buzz going when I heard a
"BAM! BAM! BAM!" at my back door. Then the doorbell once. I was thinking "what
the fuck? fuck that... im not getting out of this bath for someone at the door at
11pm". I figured it would be one of my friends, drunk, wanting to come in for "just a few
minutes" (and end up being there for hours). but then I thought, "hmm, that might be
the cops! that sucks" so I just chilled in the tub, figuring I may as well make the best of
whatever the situation was going to turn out to be. About ten minutes passed, and
nothing. No more doorbell or banging at the door, nothing. So, relaxed, I finished
off the joint over the course of 30 minutes. I got out of the tub, dried off, put
on some pants and grabbed a shirt. I walked out to my living room, which has a large
window near the door. Through the window, I see a dark figure slumped against the
glass. I am, for a second, taken aback by the sight, not having expected to see a
person there.

I throw on my shirt and open the back door to find my friend Pipe standing there,
babbling incoherently, and reeking of whiskey. I pull him inside as its very cold
outside and walk him over to my couch and sit him down. He smelled very strongly
of booze and this guy is known to overindulge in his drinking! So I try talking to him,
to see whats up with him and gague his condition. He had to have been standing there
since I heard the banging at the door, 40 minutes earlier at that point.

He is just all over the place until for a second he becomes lucid and asks me "Are the
police here yet?" and I immediately get the chills. I'm like "Pipe, why would the police
be coming here?" and I'm already thinking of everything I need to do to clear my house
of weed and pipes, etc, before the cops arrive. He just repeats the question. "Are the
police here yet?" "The police are coming" "The police are on their way here" and then he
starts peeling off his winter clothes, his boots go flying, and next thing I know here he
is standing in his normal clothes, staring into a mirror on my wall. He cant seem to break
away from that mirror gaze. So he says to me "I'm cold" and he puts his coat back on,
then he goes into my basement. I tell him "Man you gotta come upstairs" and he
says "Why?" and I said "Because you have to come upstairs" -- by this point Im thinking
he is fucked up on more than just alcohol. He walks up the stairs and lays on the
couch and is out cold. I grab my box that I keep all my weed/accessories in and I put
it inside two bags and run across my neighbors back yard to a little shrub area and stash
it all away, then I run home. Now if the police come, I've got nothing illegal here.

Next thing I know, my friend is awake again, and hes asking if the police have come
yet, and he starts pulling THOUSANDS of dollars out from his pockets and tries to give it
to me! He must have had five grand on him, all in 100s. I'm freaked out now, thinking
he's robbed a store or worse, killed someone. I grab his phone and call his Wife. No
answer! I call again, and again, no answer. I leave a message, hang up, and call his
Brother, who is a close friend of mine as well. He answers the phone sleepily, and
I say to him "Steve, your brothers fucked up I need you at my house NOW" and he says
"ok" and hangs up. He lives a good fifteen miles away, but he arrived at my door in
record time. He came walking in and Pipe was on the couch asking me if I was a cop
and if I was being scripted or prompted into what to say to him, by the police. I tell
him that hes nuts and I'm not a cop! I explain the situation to his Brother, and we decide
getting him out of the house and into a car is the best thing to do, so we can decide what
to do with him. So it takes us like 20 minutes to dress him, stuff all his cash back into
his pockets, and get him ready to go out to my friends car.

We opened the door and we each have one of his arms, and we're dragging him between
the two of us. As we leave, there just happened to be two cars driving by, seeing us
dragging a man across the street into a waiting car It must have been funny for them!

So we get him into the car and we're debating two possible destinations. Either the police
department, because we think he may have been involved in a crime, and we dont want
to be part of that; or take him to the Hospital, because he has been renovating a house
that used to be a meth house, and we don't know what kinda stuff he may have gotten
into by accident while working there. We eventually opt for the Hospital. Pipe was
thinking that we were cops for sure when we talked about going to the Police at first. We
figured if he had been in a crime, he'd have to go to the hospital anyways, and we'd be
surprised if the cops weren't called when we got there.

So we get him to the hospital and we ask him if he wants a smoke before we take him
into the ER, he says no, so we walk into the ER and he tries to light up a smoke So
we take him back outside for a few minutes, let him smoke, then returned to the ER.

So we get in there and discover that since he isnt unconsious, or near death, we cant
admit him. So we wait to try to get ahold of his wife who eventually showed up, drunk as
hell, in tears, etc and we finally get him admitted after about 3 hours!" The police did
show up at the ER but they wouldnt take him to "detox" or anything, so we could only
sit there until his wife came.

In all, that night sucked.

Turns out, he was at the bar, got smashed, ran ito a friend of his who had some shrooms
and he bougtht them all, ate a bunch, then came to my house to share, and then just
flipped out! The money came from a car he sold earlier that night. I wish he would
have just said he was on mushrooms, but he was so afraid that we were cops that he
couldnt bring himself to say it.

~Experimentalist

 

Glad you enjoyed it

~Experimentalist

 

Yep, you got it! haha

Nice pic

~Experimentalist

 

What? No one jacked any cars man.

~Experimentalist

 

All of them? That must have taken some time Thanks for reading!

Yeah no shit eh.. know what sucks? He said that after I didnt answer the door, he
ran and stashed the rest of the shrooms somewhere cause he thought the cops were
after him, and he came back to my door. I found his one glove near where he said
he stashed the shrooms, but we never did find them.

Thanks!

~Experimentalist