This is a bit long, but a worthwhile story. Feel free to respond with as many "OH MY GOD"s and "HOLY SHIT"s as you can muster. So last Spring, I spent 2 weeks in Boston. While there, I was determined to visit a Bostonian headshop, just to say I did it and maybe pick up a locally-made pipe or something. So I find search around on my computer at the hotel (Westin Inn in South Harbor, HIGHLY RECOMMENDED), and I find out there's only ONE headshop in all of Boston, which I cannot for the life of me remember the name of. I found this to be extremely surprising, but apparently they all go out of business because Boston is predominately tourist-based economically, so business that depend on regular customers and specialized business tend to go out of business pretty fast. I cross-reference a map of the city with the Boston subway system, which is oddly named Charlie, I find the nearest stop to the headshop and I got on my merry way. I was very impressed with the place; prices were a little higher than I was used to, but I anticipated higher prices. The variety was stunning, though. They had every style in every size and color, with options for left- or right-shotguns, too. I decided to buy my friend a small, color-changing pipe and I bought myself a hand-size bubbler, probably the size of a large bowl with the perfect-sized water chamber. I named the newest member of my family... Charlie. Flash forward about 2 weeks. My friend Claire has recently started smoking on a regular basis, and my step-sister Hufflepuff (we call her Hufflepuff because if she were to go to Hogwarts, she'd get into the house for the ordinary and/or mentally retarded... Hufflepuff) has recently become a stoner again. We hadn't chilled much due to my being in Boston, so we decided to take a burn ride. I figured I'd tell them stories about my trip, they could meet Charlie, my favorite smoking device I have ever owned to-date. I didn't want to take my car because I had a two-door at the time, and no one likes sitting in the back of a compact car. Claire couldn't drive because her license was suspended for an unpaid speeding ticket, and Hufflepuff... well we don't really expect much from Hufflepuff. The nickname pretty much sums up our expectations of her. I have the tendency to leave my wallet in my car when I'm not going into a place where I think I'll need it. My logic is that way, I'll never not have it when I need it. However, when Claire suggested I drive HER car, I never thought to get it. Off we go, cruising down a moderately populated local highway. We cross over a bridge, turn onto a back road and bring out Charlie. We finished the first round, and was halfway through the second when I pass two cops, one a K9 unit, parked alongside each other in a gravel pull-off on the other side of the road. I was obeying all traffic laws, so I wasn't that worried. But both of them pull out behind us. Immediately, I said, "Claire, make everything disappear," and tried not to make any sudden movement because the cop was REALLY riding my ass. After about a mile of my heart pounding in my throat due to the partially-smoked bowl in the bubbler under the passender seat and the quarter of nugs in Hufflepuff's hoodie pocket. The lights go on, so I pull us over in front of a church (which is pretty funny now that I think back on it). By this time, I realize I have no wallet. The cop comes up to the window, I give him Claire registration and info from the glovebox, and tell the cop I don't have my license on me, that I wasn't prepared to drive but my friend's license was suspended. After he takes down my license info, he goes back to his car. When he comes back, he asks the dreaded question... "Are there any illegal substances in your vehicle, ma'am?" I realized he wasn't talking to me, he was talking to Claire, who actually owned the car. I knew better how to handle these situations, and it make me sick when I realized Claire had no experience with police. "There shouldn't be" is how she responded. Well, we're screwed. The cop says, "Would you mind if we searched your vehicle?" If you say no, they must obtain a search warrant from a judge. The likelihood of this happening at 11:00 on a weekday night is very slim. To may dismay, Claire doesn't know this. "Sure." We get out of the car, and the cop asks us to stand in front of his. At this point, an older cop has appeared and they both take to going through the contents of Claire's messy car. It didn't help that she had about 17 empty blunt tubes all over the car. Luckily, they didn't find anything. "Ma'am, do you mind if we bring out our drug dog to check things out?" OH FUCK. "Go right ahead." At this point, I'm feeling really high, which actually loosened me up a little. I leaned over to Hufflepuff and Claire and said, "Guilty people don't move, loosen up." It didn't take long for the dog to find the bubbler under the seat, which the cops oddly missed. They bagged it, along with several of the blunt tubes and lighters out of the car. Upon searching the trunk, they add to their collection two empty baggies. In exchange for minimal penalty, the cops ordered us to give them our "supplier." Unfortunately, I am doing a favor for a friend and keeping my source under the radar, so Hufflepuff and Claire think it's from me. Before they say anything, I jump in and make up a description of a fake on-campus dealer who can be found by a certain bench on these days at this time. Claire was written a ticket for possession of less than 14 grams and a repair order for the front driverside headlight (?!?!%^%$#?! the reason we got pulled over), nothing in writing for Hufflepuff or myself, and we were set loose. When we got back to Claire's place, Hufflepuff pulled the quarter out of her pocket (which the dog apparently never detected) and we smoked face. Another odd thing... nothing ever came of Claire's ticket. The cop never turned it in, she's checked back regularly and even with the court house. She called the actual cop, too, and he said it was taken care of.
wow, that turned out nicely. complete cooperation helps out ur situation a LOT, but rarely do they end up doing NOTHING. you got lucky.
wow, the skin of the back of your neck must have been burning like a motherfucker after that close call, nice. and there were like 5 times throughout the story where i did one of these
I was doing those in my head throughout the entire experience. I don't really go on smoke rides anymore, and pretty much stopped smoking with Claire and Hufflepuff.
lol, i never smoke n' drive. i just can't trust my driving skills high, no matter how well i feel like im driving.
You know, maybe that's what did the trick? We'll never know... She was lookin' pretty nice that night, come to think about it. She always got dolled up when I came around, haha.
Not really. We sort of lost touch over the summer, and she has a boyfriend now, meaning all her friends will seldom hear from her. I got drunk with her last night at a bar in my college's town, brought back old memories. My "avatar" (I believe that's the correct word) is a pic of me passed out on her stairs last winter, haha.