\tMothers milk contains cannabinoids and has the Congress alarmed A recent report from researchers that pregnant women produce a controlled substance in their bodies .cannabinoids produced in marijuana plants,and deliver it to innocent newborn children through they're breasts. The Republican House majority leader has called for the DEA to start immediately creating specialized eradication teams that will,upon receiving notification of a woman's pregnancy due to a requirement that doctors must report pregnancies to law enforcement as they do gun and knife wounds,be dispatched to remove the pregnant woman's breasts to stop these drug pushers reducing their child's IQ if they decide to breastfeed. It is a known fact that any person that has smoked a marijuana cigarette can never give it up unless they are a politician that quit because it slowed down their thinking processes,,all other previous users are liars and women will lie and breastfeed after promising not too. The Democratic majority leader has called for a much cheaper solution that won't remove the breasts that most Democrats confuse as a government tit for them to feed off of want to ban sex to avoid any possibility of a sneaky mother determined to harm her child. The Republican plan has estimated that it will take $13 billion dollars to create a bureaucracy to enforce the new policy because the DEA refused to participate in any drug policy that did not include prison for the criminals and potheads involved and the Administrator refused to support any policy that would harm what put her where she is today. No estimate was given on the Democratic plan because Democrats can't estimate the manpower it will take to enforce the “Just say NO to sex†policy. A study by Rand has been requested and they expect the report on the findings within 5 years. During that time they will create a temps only agency to do the best they can and run by hand.
that is straight shit there bro. what a bunch of control junkies (( controlling)) everything!!! get a t shirt that says. I made a cannabinoid in my body today and so did you. what r u going to do about it? Oh, and to think that we have the same stuff in us as cannabis does, who woulda thunk it. plants and humans can co exist peacefully.
Pretty stupid spoof. Wasn't written like a news article at all. Difficult to understand. Concept is there, execution was awful
I thought it was pretty f=good for a highschool dropout that had never smoked any marijuana until he found the treatment for PTSD where he got it from and it was called shell shock.