Motherf***in dinosaurs

Discussion in 'Real Life Stories' started by ReadThis, Aug 9, 2011.

  1. I arrive to work, high and feeling very productive. I sell electronics at a retail electronics store. I look at the tvs and see that the employees are playing the same old, dull, monotonic documentary on Georgia.

    Who gives a fuck about Georgia? I digged through our stash of saved movies and struck gold-Jurassic Park.

    (No offense to Georgians, but would you rather watch old buildings and swamps in slow mo, or mother fuckin dinosaurs rippin shit up on a 65inch hdtv equipped with polk audio speakers)

    So then, in my usual high nature, I come up with a great idea. Why not put dinosaurs everywhere? Cuz if you gonna do simethin you gotta do it big. I'm talking triceratop screensavers on laptops, dinosaur artwork on the google tv, soundbars up to the max so when that guy gets ate while on the toilet, we can hear his bones crunch. And my ultimate creation, a link of monitors showing peices of a t-rex, so when lined together they form a bad ass dinosaur.

    I start with the google tv. I find this kickass jurassic park pic on the web. I display it WHILE Jurassic park plays on the bottom right of the tv. I hold back the tears as I stare at my greatness.

    Next, I head over to the soundbars when I see the betrayl I feared. My manager starts changing the channel. I ask why, thinking he would say because of the graphic nature, I was ready to go to war. I was preparing an argument suggesting we played many shows equally as graphic-shark week being my main evidence.

    I didn't get the chance to defend my point of view because the reason he changed the channel, was a curve ball. He said, a female asociate is terrified of dinosaurs.

    Dinosaurs people. Extinct dinosaurs. This only made me want to further my plan and to buy an inflatable dinosaur to place in the middle of the store. I didn't, just because I dont know where to get one. Any ideas on how to expand my dinosaur takeover plan?

    And how can anyone possibly be scared of dinosaurs? Maybe barney robbed her. Maybe she recently had a bad dream about dinosaurs taking over the world. Maybe her boyfriend can't get a t-rextion. Maybe I'm just way too high.
  2. Hey give dinosaurs a break man..we're not always about rippin shit up...I'm actually just about to do some philanthropic work.
  3. earlbaby.jpg

    I just took it there :cool:
  4. Hey man where do you work? And dinosaurs are the shit! They didn't go extinct, they just moved on and kicked the crap out of Mars, it wasn't always a barren planet you know.
  5. It's the government man, they're coming after our dinosaurs.
  6. WTF??

    I was just having an argument with a guy at work about dinosaurs!@!!

    He is a hardcore religious guy, and he was sayin that dinosaurs lived on earth way longer than science books say. He was gettin all worked up over it. :D

    I think Im gonna change all the screens at MY work to dinosaurs now...

  7. #7 ReadThis, Aug 10, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 15, 2016
    Lmfao. I'm can't stop laughing.

    I don't want to disclose where I work. Maybe I'm just paramoid cuz I just blazed on break.
  8. you would be the only dinosaur i wouldn't mind eating me alive, id probably laugh to death lol
  9. Dinosaurs Were Made Up by the CIA to Discourage Time Travel!

  10. That is fucking comedic genius :laughing:

    Deep down, all of us are still 6 years old, and Dinosaurs are the fucking coolest thing ever. What dinosaur would you guys be? I'd be a Pterodactyl, I've always wanted to have the power of natural flight.
  11. t-rex mother fucker. Dont care if he may have been a scavenger, theres not much cooler then being 20 ft tall with a mouth big enough to swallow someone whole.
  12. My favourite dinosaur is the flying one (always forget my favourite dinosaur's name D:)

    and the doyouthinkhesaurus.
  13. I'd probably be one of those fuckin long necks... I mean I'm already 6' 5" I think that'd be the easiest transition.
  14. Hahaha, OP, I have't laughed this hard at a post in awhile


    Dinosaurs enjoy the herbal too
  15. Next you should put pterodactyls hanging from the ceiling.

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