Looking for Job, heavy smoker...

24 days 2 hours 36 minutes 19 seconds

 

Stop smoking first of all. Drink lots of fluids, water and cranberry juice is good. Exercise. Dont eat fatty foods.

 

Fast food. That's it.

You might need somebody to pool in rent with that income.

But that's pretty much your option...

 

stop smoking drink plenty of water (aim for at least a gallon a day) and exercise

 

Same thing everyone else says. Anything that speeds up your metabolism will help. Drink lots of cold water, a couple cups of black coffee or tea every day, exercise - cardio AND weights. Weights will help speed your metabolism. Healthy eating, lots of fiber. And stop smoking, of course.

There is no magic cure, so don't even try for it. Those detox drinks and what not are just a scam, so don't bother with them.

 

Honestly man, If the dude hiring you likes you/thinks you're cool
he won't give a fuck if you smoke. More people smoke than you think

Ok i'm gonna tell you how to clean out

Bike ride, 30 mins burn outs the carbs and some fat, Rest for 5 mins, Bike ride another 30 mins then that targets the fat cells and toxins...Try and do it 3 times a day

Drink pure water, The more water you drink the more you piss out toxins, keep drinking and you keep getting rid of the toxins and get more clean water into your body. Pure water my man, Not tap water or poland spring, I would recommend evian or fiji.

Breathe deeply, that also cleanses your system good

Go to the steam room, Inside move around, shake your hands, your head, move back and forth, Make sure you spend a long time inside the steam room. Drink water.

Then take dieurtic, that shit will make you piss real good and get tons of toxins.

Avoid fatty foods or foods that take long to digest, because the toxins stick with it, Actually you might want to go vegan because you're body would clean up faster

Steam room twice a day if you can, do push ups in there, Actually taking a fucking dieurtic before you enter...Smart shit eh? Drink water. it's all clearing your system

And also do hand stands, it makes shit in your body move up and body therefore pushing the toxins and getting rid of them easier...fucking cart wheelers man lol it pushes the toxins and makes them travel out easier

Boil a hot pot of water make sure it's steam and put your nose to it, breathe the steam, it cleanses your system.

dON'T drink anything except water, make sure you take those dieurtics and go to the steam room my man.

Also avoid showers because your body absords some of the water and it sticks with the toxins, so yeah you want to basically shower as least as possible because out shower water has chems inside

Then go into the sauna, Avoid all drinks except water, You gotta drink at least 8 glasses a day, No meat, No eggs, no fatty foods, no chocolate, NO CHEESE, You gotta eat like a fucking bird man. Constantly move your body, walk around, shake, it makes the blood flow and the toxins move out

but yeah after 30 mins of any cardio you get rid of the carbs, rest, continue then you burn the fat and get rid of the toxins. 30 mins after that cardio will do you a good amount, fuck you can even do an hour if your dedicated, What you want to do sweat...stay in hot room.

Go jogging, jump around, jumping jacks

get a dieurtic at the same time too that shit is important, Do not take vitamins or any supplments during the time because it slows down the toxin removal

Showers only add more toxins to your body look it up, So as i said shower less, yeah you'll smell like shit but you won't absorb or need to dispose of any more toxins

You want to do mental exercise too, Move your neck back and forth, your head back and forth, walk straight and look up and take nice DEEP breathes, Because breahting cleans out your system as well

No bear, no cigarettes either, more toxins to get rid of, And once again no meat, no chicken, NO BREAD.

Also when you piss don't force it, take your sweet time and then FORCE that fucker out, squeeze, Then take more sips of water, but pure water man. And diet.

when you're in the sauna move like this guy...gets out toxins...

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pm4olaKe5cc&feature=fvw]YouTube - Russian Style 1 (Original Russian Style)[/ame]

 

damn dude laid it out! but OP, if you do like at least half of those things you could be clear in 3 weeks. of course it all depends on your body fat. im a lean dude (6ft, 140lbs) and twice if passed with a 3 week break. im also vegan too tho, so that helps. if youre a big guy, ur only chance is if you follow dudes instructions to a "T".

 

Fake Urine for Drug Test : Quick Fix Synthetic Urine : $24.95 - Keepshooting®

Fuck all those other answers (No offense guys) but you shouldn't have to stop smoking to get a good job. Urine tests are an invasion of privacy, and prove nothing. All the *bad* drugs usually exit your system in a matter of days! But because pot is so natural, your body lets it stick around, lol.
So smoke your heart away, and when the day comes, wear cotton pj pants under your khakis, microwave the bottle of pee for 10 seconds, then attach the hothands with the rubber band to keep it at body temp. then you just undo the lid, and squeeze, comes out in a stream and foams with an accurate sound and everything. 2oz bottle isn't that big, if somebody was watching from behind they wouldn't be able to tell.

TL;DR buy fake pee, follow instructions, smoke weed.