When I awoke this morning my legs were being pierced by the brisk, chilly night that had arrived during my dreams. I jumped out of my covers and went downstairs to grab some nourishment when I caught a glimpse of the toilet and realized that was my priority. Only having boxers on I entered the small enclosing that comprises my downstairs bathroom. I could feel a steady cold air flow illuminating from the closed window I sat beside while trying to defecate. Come to think of it, this is actually my second bowel movement this morning. Smoking alot of cheese and being victim to severe munchies usually causes me to consume enormous amounts of food and take anywhere from 2-4 full-to-half sized shits on usual in the morning hours However, lets get back on topic. I am in the bathroom, I rest my bare cheeks directly on the toilet seat contracting the sharp chill of the freezing porcelain. I then clear my mind and initiated the launch countdown. 3..2..1... blastoff! The first set of cargo on my second delivery had been delivered with maximum efficiency. At this exact moment in time I began to cognate opportunities and possibilities. Ideas of adventure and fulfillment began to flow into my mind as if a caravan of negros were sailing down the Tennessee river escaping their enslavement. I looked into my soul and realized if I want to do something I need to get off my ass and fucking do it. If I want to go to mother fucking Sweden im going to go to mother fucking Sweden. Can bitches in this world really tell you what you can and cant do? Sick bastards have used this same notion to gain their power and then use it to restrict the power of others. Now I just realized I can do whatever the fuck I want. Maybe I wont move to mother fucking Sweden however, I'm done living my life constrained within these invisible ropes restricting me of the potential in my life. For my first act of defiance against the society and it's norms, and in dedication of this great day, I wish to form a National League of Shit (NLS). This League will support people taking shits from all parts of the world. So next time your on the pot (toilet), put your hand around your chin mimicking 'the thinker' and bust out some mother fucking philosophy. FUCK THE GOVERNMENT!!! IM PRO SHITT!!!!!!