I don't even know if this is the right place, if it isn't a apologize. I'm not expecting sympathy or anything, I just really need to vent. I think I may be entering a state of depression. My family moved to bumble fuck Texas when I was entering fourth grade. I had to go to a tiny school (23 graduating class tiny). It wasn't that bad in elementary, but as I got into High school, it was got worse. I started to realize that no one was into the stuff I was. I wasn't a redneck like every other person, didn't enjoy wearing cowboy boots and wranglers or hunting every day after school. I was actually very well liked in my school, I was nice to everyone, I just never really found a good "friend" who liked the stuff I did. In 10th grade, there was this kid who moved in from Houston with his aunt and started going to my school, we became best friends and were like clones, we enjoyed the same shit. In 11th grade, he had to move back to Houston because his Aunt kicked him out. We kept in touch, and I realized he was getting in with the wrong crowd back in Houston. Skipping school, failing, and just not doing well, I could tell he wasn't going to be doing anything with his life if he kept it up (keep in mind this kid has had a tough life, he doesn't know his dad, lives with his Grandma who is on government assistance, and his mom is a druggy who doesn't help with anything.) so i talked to my parents, and convinced them to let this kid move in with us. He did when we got to 12th grade, and he started straightening up, making good grades and shit. After about 4 months of him living with me, we went to the mall one day and the dumbass stole a pair of jeans and got caught, so he got kicked out of my house by my parents and had to move back to Houston, again. So there I was again, left in a town with no true "friends" I actually liked hanging out with. Fast forward a bit now. Out of the 23 kids in my class, only a couple of us went to college, me being one of them. I didn't get accepted to UT, so I got offered something called the "CAP" program instead. Which means I could go to a branch of UT for a year, and if I make a 3.2 GPA or higher, I could transfer to UT. So I chose UTSA as my branch school to go to for a year. Classes have started and this is when I realized how fucked I am. Going to school in bumble fuck Texas so long has screwed me over. The education I received was complete shit. I am struggling in my classes because half the stuff that is suppose to be "review" from high school, I have never heard before. It doesn't help that I am having to take 19 hours a semester either. EVERYONE leaves this school on the weekend to go back home except for me. Which sucks. I sit in my dorm all fucking day long bored out of my mind. This has made me start smoking ALOT. I use to only do it a couple times a month, but now I have been doing it daily because I get so bored. I can honestly say I have yet to make any friends here that I actually like yet. The few that I have made and I actually like, leave on the weekends. It's just so depressing to me. I thought college was going to be exciting and fun. Now it's just making me depressed. I feel so alone here. I am honestly thinking of dropping out and going to a trade school. I don't think I will be making the 3.2 to get to UT because school is kicking my ass, and the film program (which is my major) here sucks. So I don't know what to do really. Fuck it, I'm ending this venting. I could go on and on but this is enough. Sorry again if this is the wrong place (or if it's even just not allowed). I'm bored as shit, so if anyone wants to talk, then awesome.
Just hang in there man, I grew up in and around Austin so I know a lot of people that are doing the same kind of thing as you are so i know there are cool people at you're school ha I go to texas tech and will probably transfer to ut at some point because I love Austin and ut is a better school. I didn't find my first year of college to be that hard but I really can't speak to your situation if your high school was really that shitty and i dont know what kind of classes you are taking, plus thats a lot of hours lol i would say just hang in there man, because san antonio isn't that bad and austin is the shit if you can make it there. and i know what you mean being around rednecks etc. as i said im going to tech and grew up in austin, it's not like its there is a hugh difference in the amount here but it is defiantly noticeable haha
Try to paragraph things a little more...not to diss, but the whole "wall or text" thing is just, hard to look at.
It must really suck, It's different where I am at. I was born a city kid all my life, good luck to your future, and try to find as many friends go to parties visit your family here and there.
you dont need alot of friends. when i was in school i knew everyone. i was sort of a 'jack the lad' now i have left i have fucked them all off....well, except the ones with nice weed. you will come to understand that only you have got your back untill the end. housten boy has to look out for his horizon. i dont know much about you but if you really want to get into UT, make sure you are aware of all options available to you, then you should be working on improving your knowledge on your chosen subject/s. even if you did have a shit education this is the internet you can learn anything on here if you try hard enough. YOU CAN DO IT BIG WILLIE JUST BELIEVE IN YOURSELF