Jokes

Discussion in 'Grasscity Forum Humor' started by Mcgangbang, Jan 4, 2011.

  1. Made up a funny joke, w.e maybe it's not but here goes nothing....

    GUY1:Whats the best way to teach america the metric system.
    GUY2: I dont know?
    GUY1:Make them sell drugs.

    haha not that funny but ya haha
     
  2. Whats funnier than a dead baby being raped by a dog?
     

  3. thats fucked up...
     
  4. A dead dog being raped by a baby
     
  5. A family of tomatoes are walking down the street when the baby tomato starts to fall behind. The dad goes back and squashes the baby tomato and says "ketchup"
     
  6. ^ Lol at Pulp Fiction.

    As for my joke(s), What's harder than nailing a dead baby to a spinning tire?

    Me when I do it!

    How do you get 100 dead babies into a trash can?
    With a blender.

    How do you get them out?
    With a straw.

    What's worse than 10 dead babies is 1 trash can?
    1 dead baby in 10 trash cans.

    What's worse than a truckload of dead babies?
    A live one on the bottom eating its way out.

    What's the difference between a truckload of dead babies and a truckload of bowling balls?
    You can use a pitchfork to unload the dead babies.

    Why do you use a pitchfork to unload a truckload of dead babies?
    So you can tell which ones are still alive.

    What's pink, red, and sits in the corner?
    A dead baby chewing on razor blades.

    What's black, green, and sits in the corner?
    Same baby 3 weeks later.

    What's blue, sparking, and hungry?
    A dead baby trying to breast feed from a wall socket.

    What's the difference between a dead baby and a rock?
    I don't f*** rocks.

    What's worse than waking up and finding a dead baby on your pillow?
    Realizing that you were drunk and made love to it the night before.

    How many dead babies does it take to paint a house?
    Depends how hard you throw them.

    What's more fun than stapling dead babies to the wall?
    Ripping them off again.

    What's pink, purple, and covered in pus?
    A peeled baby in a bag of salt.

    Why did the dead baby cross the road?
    It was chained to the bumper.

    What's pink, bubbling, and scratching at the window?
    A dead baby in a microwave.
     

  7. That's actually not a bad idea!
     
  8. I mainly buy grams, which is a metric unit.
     
  9. Santa was travelling in train. A woman sat on his son's birth and didn't get up..
    Santa shouted: "THIS LADY IS NOT GIVING BIRTH TO MY CHILD"..
     
  10. Thats how i learnd !
     
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