So Saint Peter is going to the commode to drop a few logs so he says to Jesus, "Yo Jesus, cover for me, will ya?" Jesus says "Okay." He'd never done this sort of job before so he was kind of eager to do it. He knew exactly what to do since he'd seen his buddy Saint Peter do it a million times. A few minutes later after sitting at his desk, someone finally arrives at heaven. Jesus gets a little excited. He asks the man, who was kind of short and had white hair and moustache, "Tell me old man, tell me a little about your life so I can judge whether or not you can come into heaven." So the old guy says in a timid voice, "I had a sad life. I was a carpenter who once had a son, but he wasn't really my son. Then he died and I led a sad life afterwards." Jesus stares at him and says, "Daddy?" The old guy goes, "PINOCCHIO???"