Ive Lost My Whole Family, Im In Need Of A Little Support!!!!

Discussion in 'General' started by chicken, Jul 12, 2007.

  1. this is the 3'rd time ive wrote this, and it didnt go thru,,, so its short and sweet,,

    my wife got hooked on crack,, for a yr. now... i told one of her ''crackfriends'' to hit the road,,, after being 2 hrs' late after getting off work, she said '' well im packing up and going with them'' fine i told her,, the next day i tried to get a temp. custody paper at the courthouse,,, and hit a brickwall,, i went to a legal service ... place ,,, and nothing....i talked to 7 different organizations,,,, and nothing!!!!!!!!

    i had a h.r.s. worker from the past,,, her sister calling them on us,,,,, so i called her,,, [ not something i wanted to do],,,, the hrs worker took the kids,, my son and her daughter, because i passed the piss test and she didnt,,,, my son is with me,,,,

    we had a court apperance today,, and i got hot with the judge,, because of lies that were told against me...... i allmost landed myself in jail!!!!

    she had a restraining order against me,,, said she was in fear of her life,,,, i aint never hit a woman,,,, i hate being lied against,,,

    i hated calling hrs... but i had no option,,, itried all i knew, and run up against a rock wall,,,, if only she had quit the crack a yr. ago when i begged her to stop,,,,,

    now look where its got us,,,, im clean i passed a drug test and she didnt,,, thus the reason i got my son,

    i guess my marrige is over,,, but its for the better,,, she wasnt much of a wife or a mom,,,, im focused on my son now,,,,

    i cant sleep i got so much on my mind,,,,, thats why im up ay 1;00 in the morning,,, i aint been on the board lately,,, now you know why,,,,,


    did i do the right thing?
     
  2. damnn chicken...sounds like ur going through a reallll rough time rite now...+rep for steppin up and takin control of the situation and more importanly takin care of your son...how about the daughter?
     
  3. I'm sorry for your situation brother. You need to take good care of your son, i'm sure he has had more trauma than you in this situation, but you sound like a good dad and one more thing.. bitches lie bro.. it's life.. not all bitches.. but most, when given the chance will use evey advantage they have t make it to the top.
     
  4. If you want my honest opinion, they should have put her daughter in your care as well.

    Be wary; your soon to be ex-wife is not only a liar, she may very well be a gold digger. If she attempts to file for divorce, she will lie to high heaven and suck you dry of everything you own. Judges are very sympathetic to most women who know how to put on the face of an abusee.

    My mom did the same thing and put my dad on the street in a matter of weeks. Just be prepared; start writing everything down and make a timeline of all that has happened so far. Judges and lawyers like to see things of that nature and she might have one knock on your door. If I'm wrong, let me know.
     
  5. Yeah, i think you did the right think chicken. It sounds like the situation was only bringing bad vibes to your family, hopefully now things can take a turn for the better

    *sending good vibes your way man :smoke:


    ADD: i'd say durchii made a damn fine point too, but im assuming since she failed her drug test, that what she says cannot be taken seriously by the courts
     
  6. Yea man, you did the right thing. You can only try to help a person for so long, in the end the ultimate decision is up to them. She chose crack over her family, that's a decision she'll probably regret the rest of her life, but she made it and now has to deal with the consequences.

    It's probably better for your son too. You said she wasn't much of a mom, plus crack, that can be a very damaging experience for a child.

    Hindsight is 20/20, but all you can do is learn from the past, and look towards the future.

    Do what's best for you and your son.
     
  7. i just dont understand,,, why, did she choose this drug over the wellbeing,,,, of her daughter, [ not mine] and our son,,, our lifestyle??? she had so much to loose, and didny hesitate,,, just threw it all away for crack...

    she may have thought i was playing,, but i been arguing this issue with her for over a yr. and im done with arguing,,,, it come time for action,,,, and when she left,,,, the other night,, i took action!!!

    i have my son,,, thank god,,,, he's very confused,,,, but he has his daddy,,, and ay least a part of his life aint in dissray,,,,

    i aint been on the board for a while,,, ive had a lot on my mind,,, i wouldnt even be on here tonight but i cant sleep,, due to this issue,

    i hate calling h.r.s.,,, but i had no other option, especially when she threatned to take my son to her crackhead, friends house to live,,,, I THINK NOT,,,, a good daddy i am.... ill go to the limits,,, but if you go too far,,, ill come out fighting,,,,, and she went too far.....and i have my son,,,,,

    im just so lost,,, and confused,,,,, i think i went wrong somewhere,,,, but i dont know where? i didnt do crack, it was her thing,,,,, but i guess i didnt see the warning signs,,,,, i feel bad for calling,,,, h.r.s. but i had to!!

    no other places i went for help,, would help me...

     
  8. Damn chicken. I feel for you man. That's some deep shit. You seem like a good guy, and you're only trying to do what's best for you, and your kids. I know it's tough to put something this important in the hands of something you can't control, but I'm sure Karma will treat you well my man.

    I think Durchii hit the nail on the head. That was a great post. Best of luck to ya bro.
     
  9. man you did the noble thing.. you probobly feel like shit right now.. dude, you don't even know anyone else on this forum would probobly feel 30 times worse than you do, you are very calm and insightful about this tramautic experience and you need to take the next step and get your daughter back.. any mistake you made in the past needs to be learned from, not dwelled upon, no crack smoker is going to win a custody case here.. at least not in CAli. good luck bro.. the blades are here for you whenever you need it.
     
  10. thanks,,, '' my fax''' me and you have p'med on this issue,,, before i threw it on the board,,,,

    thank you all for the support,,, im crying now,,,, it hurts ,,, it really hurts,,,,


    all i can do is focus on my son...but it hurts,,,,
     
  11. Well, I think you did the right thing, since having a parent who's a crackhead isn't good for a growing child's well being. If you put up with a crack addiction for a year and she wasn't willing to give it up to be with her son, then she dosen't deserve him in the first place. Thank god for you, otherwise your son would end up in a very dark place, where he would not like to be. I wish you luck in all of your court proceedings, and I hope for her children's sake that she stops smoking crack. The best thing that would probably happen right now would be a court ordered rehab for her. Then maybe she can get her life back on track.
     
  12. sorry to hear that chicken. although there is alot of negative things involved, its great that you seem to be focusing more on the positive. you seem like a genuinely nice guy, and i wish everything works out for the better. my prayers are with you, man. :)
     
  13. i talked to her daughter tonight,,,, she told me she loves me,,,,

    shes been woken in the middle of the night,,, about us arguing about her crack habit,,,,

    ive pulled her to the side a couple of times,,, shes 14,,, and told her of her moms problems,,,, she understands,,,,, and she accepts what is happening right now,,,,

    shes with her godparents,, [ no strangers] but why,,???? i cant understand why it had to come to this,,,

    i gave my wife more than she ever had in her life,,,,, for her to throw it all away...

    i just cant understand why,,,,, and now shes making all kinds of lies,,, on the restraining order,,,, why would she do that,,,,, why not just face the facts,,,,

    and get herself straight,,,, its obvious she needs help...... why lie?

    i may go to jail over this issue,,,, i dont deal good with authority,,,, and the next time i have lies threw at me,,, i may get arrested... and im on probation now,,, so it aint looking good...
     
  14. You did the right thing, you didn't do anything wrong. How bad was her addiction? Was it to the point where she would steal from you to buy crack? I think you should still talk to her about her drug problem, maybe try convincing her to go to rehab and working things out.
     
  15. i feel so bad,,, my house is like a ghosttown,,, no laughter,,, no love,,, no nothing....just me and my chickens,,,,, and they dont understand,

    im sure ill pull myself out of this rut,,,, but for right now,,,, im really down..

    all my friends,,, have told me i did the right thing,,, just like all you'll have,,,

    but it hurts.... im focused on one thing now,,, my son...

    my wife can go jump in front of a slow moving train!!!!!!

    when im done with you,,,IM DONE,,,, she will never lay her head in my house again....

    thank you all for your support,,,, i may need much more of it in the future,,,,,

    but really i feel better allready,,,,, my true friends are on g.c.
     
  16. I'm telling you man, just come across as a very clear cut guy in distress. You have to stay calm though, for your son's sake. The only thing worse than him being in this situation would be letting him see you lose control. That type of thing would probably make him feel very helpless.

    Oh, by the way, if she tries to justify her restraining order due to claims of 'abuse', don't be entirely troubled. You have two kids who seem to be eager to vouch for you, and if both of them stand before a judge, lawyer, even a social services agent and let them know that you have never laid a hand on their mother, you won't have a care in the world (Metaphorically speaking, of course).
     
  17. Hey chicken, sorry about losing your wife and daughter. Your daughter should most likely stay with her godparents or you should take over custody, staying in a crack infested area is ridiculous for a growing child. Maybe if I'm up your way sometime I can drop by, get some ruckus in your place. :wave:
     
  18. im going to try and get some sleep,,, i got to be at work,, in 4 hrs..... i do appreciate the posituve reply's,,,,

    i will focus on that,,, tomorrow,,,, ill try to think positive...

    and maybe i wont feel as bad as i have today,,,,, today has not been a good day,,,,

    allthough i did enjoy getting the judge red in the face.....

    but ill not tolerate lies being told on me,,,, thank you so much!!!!!!!!!
     
  19. If you're strong enough to make it through all this shit without completely losing your mind, you can make it through whatever may follow this.

    I don't know you that well chicken, but my thoughts are with you, for sure.
     
  20. thats some bullshit...sorry to hear shit aint working out...but hopefully from now on shit gets better for you.

    and people on here talking about doing heroin...just look at what crack can do to a family.
     
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