--HOW TO TELL IF YOUR CAT IS OVERWEIGHT: 10 SIGNS: --1. Your cat door is retro-fitted with a garage door opener. --2. Visitors to your house constantly mistake her for a beanbag chair. --3. She waits for the third bowl of food before getting finicky. --4. There are fewer calls to the fire department, but there is a sudden upsurge in broken branches. --5. He no longer cleans himself unless coated in Cheese Whiz. --6. After a fifteen month gestation period, there are still no kittens! --7. It's no longer safe to lift him without a spotter. --8. He only catches mice that get trapped in his gravitational pull. --9. His enormous tummy keeps your hardwood floors freshly buffed. --10. She has more chins than lives.