pre.Script: I never talk this much I'm always uptight, but weed makes me shy away from others (maybe that's because I live with a manipulative crack-attic father, an alcoholic, and ... yeah, I'll stop there). it makes me think beyond my normal thought barrier. it opens my mind up. it takes more time than it usually would to get some things done - but not all things. Take typing for example. When I'm high, since I'm thinking beyond my normal thought barrier, I can tell myself to concentrate on typing. I can listen to the sound of my fingers hitting each key stroke, even with the blower I use in this garage as an A/C. Oh, BTW, not under oath: I just smoked a very small penner. I hadn't smoked for at least week a beforehand. I went on a joint-a-day spree of two months, before which I hadn't smoked for over two years. I wanted to be 'aware' today for reasons I will not be disclosing -. I say that as if I have your full attention - *grins So after I took care of what I needed to take care of. I felt good about it. Even though my wildest dreams would have to be put on the back burner for a while. With all humility, I would say I did a much better job than my father would have *sigh, and a slightly better job than my mother would have done (only because of her anxiety - which by the way seemed to have trickled it's way down the genome to me at birth). Now, I'm sobering to the thought of what I had disclosed at this event that I just disclosed as an event but will no further disclose information therebout. (Yeah, I know that's not a word, but c'mon.. inasmuch as inasmuch..) --me <--easily confused? Okay so I had to get away from the computer for a while, now I'm back, throwing on in instrumental, looking back over what I just wrote in an attempt to get back into that same state of mind. It worked pretty well I must say. No, I did not, not under oath consume any further quantities of the element marijuana . I did get back into a much needed state of relaxation for someone the likes of myself. I was going to mention earlier my high state of mind and what effect marijuana had on my concentration. Oh wait, I already did huh? At least I noticed. I do funny things when I'm sober (remember the thing I was not supposed to disclosed, but did, not under oath?) :: If you're sober don't lie... c'mon now... lying to yourself always hurts in the end - or maybe that's just my life - or what the miserable use to.. :: I was miserable once. I may be miserable again one day. Right now, I feel good, and I never forget how to understand. I won't let anyone sit in their *fill in the blank/rhyme*. Nor would I want to pull anyone into mine. *quick thought - which is worse? consuming a small amount of marijuana then driving or road rage? STOP - THINK ABOUT IT - sorry, I just love that quote for some reason ..... I guess I'll stop there as it's my first post. .. alllllmost I couldn't do it, not yet - sorry. I thought it might be interesting to add - not under oath: I had a myspace account. I deleted it about a week ago. I figure, if I'm that damn lonely SOMETHING has to change. But that's just me y'all. Nice to meet you *extends hand ahhhhh! relaxation