Please go easy with ''find yourself some pussy, pussy'' comments I fell in love with this girl from high school and since then I can't imagine myself in a serious relationship with another woman (note that was 5 years ago and I had 2 flings since then). The thing is she's constantly coming back into my life, first we were together in high school, when that ended, we ran into each other at parties drunk, and we talked, laughed, she even let me touch her legs and butt, we have mutual friends and we got together for drinks, but she never wanted to go out with me or even just fool around. I don't know how many times I asked her out but she made it quite clear she's not interested in me. I would probably forget about her but as from October we're having the same lectures at the university (what a fucking coincidence ...) and I see her almost every day. We hang and joke around and all that shit but man I just want these feelings to stop. I'm no moron I see where this is going, situation is a dead end and I'm in the friendzone and I'm OK with that, unfortunately you can't reason with your heart. But (!) I came up with a cunning plan: I will match her with some guy she has a crush on and I have to say, at first it killed me, knowing he can have her and I can't, but more and more I try to get her with this guy, less anxious I fell, and I hope once she's in a happy relationship I'll start getting over her. So please give me some opinions. Peace.
Yea I know the feeling. Only thing I can tell you is it gets easier when you don't see her so if its really driving you crazy you are going to have to get her out of your life.
Distraction is always good. And this sounds kinda fucked but find yourself a replacement if you can. That helps tons. It's ideal but possible if you're open minded to dating around a bit. Plus the dating itself will keep you busy and not dwelling on this chick. You can also provide the D to the ladies that request it during the dating process, bonus. Nah but really dude distract yourself. Work out. Feel good about yourself. Keep yourself busy. I know the feels, it gets better (fucking eventually). EDIT- Can't believe I forgot this but try to drop everything that reminds you of her, and if it becomes impractical for whatever reason (maybe she gave you something useful idk) then at least make a point to avoid the FUCK out of her (so I'd figure out a way to drop that class). Delete her from FB if you can and don't look at that shit no matter what. That's the worst.
ugh been there man, hard. dont take this the wrong way, but stop thinking with your heart. your emotions want what is comfortable and familiar, warm and cozy. after a class with her or on a free day you might have, even a few hours, go out and just look at women. what you like what you dont, what turns you on etc. then see if you can talk to a few, maybe get your dick wet. its appearent that she is in your life, even if not romantically, and this world can be too small more often than not, and shes probably become an emotional nuisance. i member having to see my ex, which my heart wanted oh so badly, every single day and it just made seperation that much harder. we rebounded a year later, and had to say goodbye again only a few months later. that was years ago but still stings sometimes. wish some good vibes man.
this is so true at least for me, the only way to move on May be to not see her. Constantly coming back into your life is just tearing you up even more. Sent from my iPhone using Grasscity Forum
Man I just don't want to be a dick by ignoring her, I like being her friend and she's a really cool person, but on the other hand these GODDAMN FEELINGS. I guess if I keep things professional and stop with the subtle flirting I'll eventually get over her. On the other hand, she told me that one of her friends become single so maybe that's just what I need
I think your biggest obstacle is understanding the word, "no". She told you exactly how she felt and you heard it because you're repeating it back but you're not comprehending the meaning. She doesn't want to date you. It's over. Move on. Quit trying to find ways to be relevant in her life. That ship has sailed. The only thing you're accomplishing is giving birth to a very unhealthy relationship. Also, quit trying to manipulate her life. You don't know what kind of guy she's into. She didn't pick you. Leave it alone.
It's called infatuation. It's not being in love. Two completely different things. I'd focus on someone else because you're overthinking this and wasting your time. But it's your life. Sounds like she's a big flirt/tease. Lots of women use this to their advantage to further their lives/careers. It's pretty typical tbh. She's not really the one that got away either since you never had her. Move along now....
find something else that takes your focus off it...for me, it was mary jane. i aint had strong feelings for anyone in a long time, infatuation and 'yeah id fuckthat chick', sure, but no real strong feelings.
I'd say the only thing in your post I'd change is the word relationship to delusion in the sentence, "the only thing youre accomplishing..." Well said.
It is possible that there is something wrong with my subconscious and maybe deep down I still feel like we're going to be together, but man I want to be free from that shit. I hhave female friends that rejected me but we're still friends and I don't care about them. About trying to find ways to be relevant in her life, man thats deep, I guess I could work on that; we talked everyday but now we talk maybe three times a week so I guess I'm on the right track. And about that guy, man I don't really care if I'm manipulating her life, I guess I'm a born puppet master . No but seriously if this shit helps, I'm gonna set her up with some guy. Great comment though, gave me a lot to think about. Cheers!
Find her biggest flaw, that usually puts me off my crushes. Usually for me it's girls that plays mind games. Sent from my iPhone using Grasscity Forum mobile app
Moving on is the best way to forget about her... That's the simple truth. Sent from my iPhone using Grasscity Forum
Well don't try and use weed as a solution because it will simply amplify these feelings. Find friends to be around constantly and just avoid her IMO. Sent from my iPod touch using Grasscity Forum mobile app
Yeah I kind of figured that when you were interested in hooking up with her friend just to be close to her. Completely ignoring the feelings of the girl you're going to be using to get to your "friend". Another thing to consider, if she takes your advice (the stupidest move possible) and the match making fails? You're going to be the one held responsible. She is going to accuse you of sabotaging her relationships. And I'm pretty sure she's going to be right. You are not her ward or keeper. At this point I'm starting to think this "friendship" is pretty one sided. This whole topic was creepy from the get-go. Leave her alone. She's not yours.