What is creativity? Is it a different way of looking at things? For instance, looking, instead of seeing, what's right in front of you? Is it a different way of thinking? Using past experiences, or just, being in the moment? Or could it just be, another word, we have to learn, clenching anus. I think, if it's still not obvious by now, what I'm getting at is that, creativity is, ME. I am the definition of 'creativity', insanity, if you will and that is hard for me to say, as I am not a man of many words. The most words I've ever said is, knuckle sandwich, and saying that leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Luckily I use mouthwash, and I said that and not knuckle sandwich. Im trying to be creative. I'm not even human, I have no sense of humor, no friends and -blank-, wait, Im thinking of Mariah Carey, now what could that mean? ... walks off ... without saying nothing ... I'm back, just had to do a cross-word, I'm too impulsive, just the other night I wanted to take a shit, so I did. But, where was, I mean, were we, oh yeah, my cross-word. I gave up, got stuck at a 4 letter word beginning with L, the only clue was missing? I don't know it must've been some kind of riddle or unanswerable question. Look, I've probably wasted enough time so ... Fuck it, if your reading this right now, tell me, do I sound insane, when you read this? My whole life is falling apart, slowly, being remade into something more coherent, more stimulating, more fun, anywhere would be more fun, anywhere away from me. I'm too uptight, ergo, no friends, no 4-lettered-L word and no sanity. I know what it would feel like to be, the man on the moon. How lonely he must be, in a cold and distant dump of a wasteland, too far away to feel the sun shining on his skin. To feel the beating of his own heart, to feel laughter playfully stab him. I know, that last one was, forget about it. Numb to the world around him, but not of the words so recklessly tossed his way. Something he knows of quite well, standing at the other end, but this was not what he had in mind when thinking of getting some. If he ever had the chance to meet others of his kind, other humans, where would they find the courage, the heart, to live with him, to live with me. To live without love? How can anyone live with me, Im dumb, a slob, I have no manners or common sense, but I act or rather lie to look better, show me your ways. I heard living is loving, well show me how to live. Do any of you think I should tell my parents this, seeing as were all one? How long have I been searching?
Sure, everyone feels love, not everyone is lucky enough to feel romantic love very often though Sometimes insanity is a lot more fun than sanity. If you really think about it most of the world is insane but we're so accustomed to it all that we don't think so. Why did this start out about creativity and then talk about all that other stuff?
How do you know the man on the moon is lonely? (The moon shines because it's reflecting the suns light btw) I can spend a lot of my time alone and being lonely never crosses my mind. When I can immerse myself in something enjoyable (i.e. creating music or watching a movie/TV) I can have just as much fun as I do sometimes hanging out with a friend.
If being alone does not mean your lonely, then you are not human. And being human means being friendly, being social, but mostly being present. I've forgot all that, but knowing it can only bring you so far, if I can go further, I don't know
What is your definition of Human? Every person is a Human no matter how they act or think. I too am alone a lot of the time and actually prefer to be alone....I am not in the least bit lonely.
Life is too complex, Im seeing too much signs that I need to change. Movies, music, Tv, everywhere, am I going nuts? Or is there no sanity? There must be a God, but how can he be explained? Does he even need to be? I know he is out there somewhere and it will be my job to find him. I need to change.