As an avid pandora's box lurker, this is of course the first place I decided to turn to Aaanyways, I've been "suffering" from insomnia for the past 2 years now. I don't know exactly why or exactly when, but I know that on a normal night when I haven't been drinking or extremely distracted, I'm lucky if I can get to bed before 4am. The only thing I can think of is my anxiety that's keeping me awake; and honestly I'm not even sure if it can be considered "anxiety" or if it's just me being foolish. A little backstory: Basicly stemming from a girl (of course..). I crushed on a girl all through highschool, was great friends with her, but no one (even us) ever imagined us being together. Long story short, we end up dating at the end of sophmore year of college. Everything was great until she went to study abroad second semester of junior year. I missed her and wanted to talk to her but she wanted her distance which I respected. I did manage to muster up the funds to fly myself overseas to visit her for my spring break though (which she loved). May comes around, she comes home.. we begin to argue.. lots. She breaks up with me, and i go into a minor depression (being that it was pretty much my dream girl everyone was very understanding and there for me). Begining of senior year i start hooking up with a different great girl(to try and help myself get over things), things go well, then my first girl finds out.. more arguing.. Somehow we start hanging out again, and at this point I didn;t think my feelings had faded for my first girlfriend at all. We end up back together for a few weeks, then I go on spring break. When I get home I feel like there's more feelings for the second girl then the first. So I jump ship and go back to the second girl. Now I find myself, at the end of senior year, with the second girl as pretty much my girlfriend, but still feeling like my heart belongs to the first girlfriend (the first girl I ever really loved.. cheesy but honest) Thats as short as I could make it.. sorry for the read. So now I ask for your advice. Should I still be feeling this way? I kinda broke her heart the second time around and I'm 99.9% sure she'd never get back together with me. On top of that, the girl I'm with now is head over heels about me and I don't know how I feel completely. I really like her a lot, but she lives far away and the distance is already getting to me.. on top of my other feelings. Sorry for the poor wording and possibly hard to understand story.. It's almost 6:30am and I've been awake for 2 days while my mind just fucks itself over and over. Thanks for any input
dude you need to start respecting yourself, first and foremost. do whatever makes YOU happy. don't try to please both girls expectations.. just do what you know is going to make you happy. and see a psychiatrist about your insomnia. they're really apt to give you sleeping pills for awhile if you say your insomnia is related to your depression. of course they may try and put you on an ssri but you don't have to take that. just get some lunesta/ambien and get on a good sleep schedule. my psych prescribed me ambien recently and i really think that now that i'm sleeping a lot more normally, that i'm also feeling a little happier. bottom line, take care of yourself, and you'll start to feel better. good luck man
The hardest part I've found is trying to find out what actually does make me happy.. I thought going back to the second girl was what I wanted,and I can't keep flip flopping either. And about the sleeping pills.. I'm not sure if thats the greatest idea due to my addictive personality. I got prescribed concerta a few years back and by the 2nd week I was abusing it, so I'm kinda nervous about the same thing happening with that.
Try an OTC sleeping pill Diphenhydramine (Benedryl) knocks me out even with the reccomended dose. But i also advise you to see a phyciatrist or therapist even for 1 sitting and discuss in detail your symptoms. Theres litterally a ton of anxiety/depresion meds and most likely one could fit your needs without the potential for abuse. Im currently on an ssri (Selective Serotonin re-uptake inhabitor) prozac, and found it to often stabilize my mood and generally not let things get to me or worry me as they would. This may not be for you and again thats why i suggest you see someone and explore the options available to you. Ironically i am going through nearly the same situation as you described currently dating another girl yet resenting my ex for so many thing that happened between us and it is hard to focus on other shit man btu you gotta see the bigger picture and so many other things there are in life (besides women, and even drugs!) that bring happiness into ur life. hope this shed a little light man good luck
i had a revelation when i came into this thread (and i've got a fever, cough, and cold so i'm obviously more in tune with the universe at this moment) so i'm going to share it with you: When I get to the bottom I go back to the top of the slide Where I stop and turn and I go for a ride Till I get to the bottom and I see you again Yeah, yeah, yeah Do you don't you want me to love you I'm coming down fast but I'm miles above you Tell me tell me come on tell me the answer and you may be a lover but you ain't no dancer also, for some equally as practical advice, you need to do some breathing practice. In through the nose, out of the mouth WITH COMPLETE CONCENTRATION. Your mind will do what it does but when you manually take over its structure you'll feel better, i promise. in. out. in. out. there is nothing but breathing. in. out. in. out. slow and steady, son.
try melotonin. Its a natural otc sleep aid that isn't addicting and is found naturally in the body I think. It works great for me.