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IMPORTANT new gov warnings

Discussion in 'General' started by Digit, Mar 25, 2003.

  1. I downloaded it fine but it was still a li'l screwy, maybe you should just copy and paste it to a post if it's not too big.

    It does seem interesting, what the fuck is my government doing now? This looks to be almost as bad as the whole duct tape and plastic sheeting thing (if you know what I'm talking about).
  2. a lil screwy how? can u see the pictures and the captions for each?
  3. i wanted to have a look at this, tryed a few times but no joy.
    i wanna c if its as stupid as the info on the uk gov web sight.
    gr8 aint it, the only place u can get info on what we shd do incase the shit hits the fan is on the net. if u aint got a pc on the net and go out of ur way to find it they dont give a toss about u.

    if some1 can post it up here that wud b cool.
  4. i wish i could...

    i tried copy and paste... no joy

    maybe if someone else smarter with all the techno webby stuff, could dwnload it... maybe use ftp? and find a way of uploading it.
  5. ÐÏࡱá\t\t

    The US government has a new website,  HYPERLINK "http://www.ready.gov" http://www.ready.gov.

    The thing is that the pictures from the site are so ambiguous they could mean anything! Here are a few interpretations.

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/expl_vis_dont_run.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 
    If you have set yourself on fire, do not run

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/expl_vis_shout.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 
    If you spot terrorism, blow your anti-terrorism whistle. If you are Vin Diesel, yell really loud.

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/expl_vis_open_door.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 
    If you spot a terrorist arrow, pin it against the wall with your shoulder

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/bio_vis_substance.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 

    If you are sprayed with an unknown substance, stand and think about a cool design for a new tattoo.

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/expl_vis_flashlight.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 
    Use your flashlight to lift the walls right off of you!

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/vis_chem_wash.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 

    The proper way to eliminate smallpox is to wash with soap, water and at least one(1) armless hand.

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/expl_vis_cover_nose.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 
    Michael Jackson is a terrorist. If you spot this smooth criminal with dead, dead eyes, run the hell away.

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/vis_chem_area.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 

    Hurricanes, animal corpses and your potential new tattoo have a lot in common. Think about it.

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/vis_chem_affected.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 

    Be on the lookout for terrorists with pinkeye and leprosy. Also, they tend to rub their hands together manically.

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/expl_vis_closed_door.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 

    If a door is closed, karate chop it open.

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/vis_rad_time.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 

    Try to absorb as much of the radiation as possible with your groin region. After 5 minutes and 12 seconds, however, you may become sterile

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/nuc_vis_building.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 

    After exposure to radiation it is important to consider that you may have mutated to gigantic dimensions: watch your head.
     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/vis_high_windows.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 

    If you've become a radiation mutant with a deformed hand, remember to close the window. No one wants to see that shit.

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/vis_high_stay.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 

    -- If you hear the Backstreet Boys, Michael Bolton or Yanni on the radio, cower in the corner or run like hell.

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/bio_vis_resp.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 

    If your lungs and stomach start talking, stand with your arms akimbo until they stop.

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/expl_vis_dust.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 
    If you are trapped under falling debris, conserve oxygen by not farting.

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/expl_vis_drop_roll.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 
    If you lose a contact lens during a chemical attack, do not stop to look for it.

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/vis_car_wire.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 
    Do not drive a stations wagon if a power pole is protruding from the hood.

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.ready.gov/i/vis_rad_shield.gif" \* MERGEFORMATINET 

    -- A one-inch thick piece of plywood should be sufficient protection against radiation.

     INCLUDEPICTURE "http://www.geocities.com/zoi_sama/food.txt" \* MERGEFORMATINET 
    Always remember to carry food with you during a terrorist attack. At least you'll be able to enjoy a nice coke and apple before you die.
  6. yeah thats the same problemthat i had when i posted em.

    i sent them in an email to loadsa peeps... i think rumjil got a copy... maybe she knows how to get it all posted here...

    .... rumjil... rumjil..... i need your help again....

    (i feel like the little kid constantly tuggin at his mom's clothes always needing something)

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