OK blades. I need a bit of guidance. I met a guy a while ago who I actually quite like. This is a very rare occurance. So all was good, we clicked, we chilled, we danced, we smoked amongst friends. I'm not one to rush into things, I like to let it all develop naturally - to me that's definately one of the best parts. However. After I met him, I met his best mate. Who is way vocal about really liking me. I am now in quite an awkward position. The guy I like definately seems to be a good guy and wouldn't screw his mate over for a girl. And I DEFINATELY wouldn't want to come between them. But I don't like the other guy (like that, he is lovely though) and I don't want to lead him along either. And like I said, me meeting someone I actually like is extremely rare. It's happened maybe three times in my life. So. What do I do? Do I just ignore it and hope it all works out or get pro-active about it?
Honestly i dont see why its a big deal, just tell the guy you dont like that you dont like him that way, if you ignore it he'll possibly take it farther and just get hurt more in the longrun
But, the guy who likes you could get all pissy about you liking his friend more, (or more so, you not liking him in that way) and do some dumb shit...
It's a fucking huge deal. I know it's probably better that I tell him straight but I honestly am incapable of hurting someone's feelings like that. And this kind of thing happens to this guy a lot. But you're right. I'll just have to grit my teeth and pull the trigger.
I'd tell him only if it's really going to be an issue, or he is getting on your nerves that bad We don't want someone going off and killing themselves now do we? (Hey I've seen people get that bad over this)
What the hell can happen? If you really like this guy then don't let his friend get in the way, it's not your problem that you don't like him. It's whoever you choose to be with. Theres only two options you can choose from. Get with this guy. Don't get with this guy. What's the problem? How would he be screwing his friend over for a girl if you're the one who has to choose.
It may just be a point of view thing i know if a girl is telling me shes into me and i dont like her im honest about it. if someone kills themselves over not being liked there is more wrong with them than they let on to
some guys will be that devastated, but thats his feelings not his reason. ultimately, if you dont see yourself being romantic with the guy, its not gonna happen. period. he needs to just get over it and understand that, it happens. sometimes people are not attracted to each other in such a way, and you cant force attraction in these situations. and then you need to get with his friend cuz his friend is probably thinking about you right now hoping youll want to get with him
im that guy. anyway, if they are best mates, they are not gonna let a girl come between them. Just go with your feelings, and not other peoples
Well, this has definately helped me confirm my thoughts. I thank you all for your words of wisdom. Hopefully tomorrow will see some developments.
Do what a girl would do. String the best friend along while you get with the guy you like. Then once you get slightly bored, have an affair with the best mate. Never tell the guy you actually like until his friend breaks down or you get in a huge fight. Or you could do the logical thing and get with the guy you like. Forget the other guy, hes gotta get over it.
I've been in the position of the second guy a couple times, and while it stings initially, I'd much rather be part of a triangle friendship with an awesome guy and girl, rather than see the two never come together because they're afraid of hurting me. If he's not a douchebag, he'll get over his one-itis and embrace his friends' relationship. If he is a douchebag and tries to get in the way, then he doesn't really deserve to have his feelings taken into consideration anyway.
Depends on how close the guys are as friends. My best friend is the kind that wouldn't talk to a girl if I liked her. Hes also the kind to call a girl a bitch, and hate her just cause I do. If the guys are super close friends you might just be kind of fucked.
THIS. If the guy isnt a total dick he should be able to get over it. U need to bring some of yer girlfriend's around and see if u can hook him up. He wont feel like he is being left out that way. If I liked a chick that was into one of my friends and she TOLD me she didnt like me and liked my buddy I would be kinda hurt. BUT if that same chick said "I will try to hook u up with one of my girls though" (and did) It would definitely be easier to get over the girl I liked in the first place.
You could try fixing up the one you don't like with a friend/acquaintance that would be a good match. If you're gonna just say not interested, just be gentle and kind but firm so that he doesn't latch on and have hopes that you'll come around some day.
This is a wonderful idea. Only problem is, ALL of my friends are guys! Except about three. One of whom isn't actually talking to me and the other two have boyfriends. There is another one but I wouldn't let her near him. She's a great friend but boy, does she use and abuse guys...