I'm not at the point where I see suicide as my only option... yet, but I've been contemplating it. If anything, I'm at the point where I could care less if I crash my car and die or get hit by a truck, but yeah. Hell, I had to hold a knife near my arm earlier just to make myself feel better. I'm not poor, I'm not living in a hut, I'm not starving. In fact, I have a car, parents who are well-off and care about me, a house, yet I'm so steeped in depression I can't appreciate any of that. I have all the nice conveniences of life, except control. This isn't the first time I felt like I didn't have control and was in depression. I dealt with it for six years and then finally my life got better and now that control I had was just ripped away from me in a sudden and quick decision. Now I'm just suicidal. I can't take this. I can't enjoy the goodness of the herb. I can't enjoy life.
Yeah isn't it great I have to talk about a subject now that is against the rules just because of where I have landed in life. Yeah, I feel real great that I've been driven to the point where I need to ask a suicide question. I accept the consequences too from teh staff.
You say your life is relatively comfortable. So what exactly is your issue? Nothing is such that it can't be fixed, including your attitude and views right now. If it's depression, go get help. It's not that big of a deal. Swallow your pride and ask for help.
Your a "For Show" suicide person "I had to hold a knife near my arm earlier to make myself feel better" is when i realize i simply do not care. Go talk to a therapist or someone man.
We all face pressures like this, along with ups and downs. Its part of life, without the bad you can't appreciate the good.
This type of topic really isn't appropriate for GrassCity - please, I beg you , contact a suicide hotline or a health-care professional ASAP. THanks. Best of luck.