One time I was driving and I swear to god I saw a piglet/hog in the middle of the road, I asked my friend if that was a piglet and he was like nah it was a cat bro. Another time was when I was chilling in my backyard and for some reason there was a random ass blanket laying in the grass, from my angle it looked like one of the fold up camping chairs.
I lived with a guy once that slept on an air mattress...and every night he would blow it up with a little electric pump. I lived with that guy for like 3 weeks thinking, 'wow he sure likes to vacuum alot, everynight before he goes to bed...what a clean person' ..I'm stoned all the time so I think that counts...
one time, me and two other friends were tp'ing a house and a house across the street had an air conditioning unit that sounded like a car speeding close everytime it kicked on. needless to say, we ran away multiple times on false alarms. then.. the cops got called as we set off penny bombs..
i grew up in the suburbs where all the houses looked the same. i was shitfaced wasted one night, wandered into my neighbors house, and fell asleep on their couch. woke up 5 minuets later to my neighbor beating the fuck out of me with a wooden bat lol good times
This one time i thought a clairnet was a clairnet, so i put it on my dick and played hot crossed buns. Needless to say, i dampened the reed on the mouthpiece with my cum, for the instruments owner. If she puts it in her mouth does that count as a blowjob or what? They need some kind of manual for this shit.
So I'm sitting in my friends car (which was parked about a foot away from my garage door) baked as fuck, well anyways I kept looking up thinking we were going to run into it because I thought he was driving. Another time I was driving home from a friends house and i kept thinking the mailboxes were deer. (dam Wisconsin deer)
One of my roommates is always out in the yard weeding the lawn. We have a fire hydrant in the front in the corner and every time I drive up the street I always think the fire hydrant is my roommate pulling weeds.
i used to smoke blunts at my friends house that was like a mile away and everytime i walked home high as shit in the night i thought like fog or w/e was like fucking poltergeist shit going into me
I HAVE got 1 or 2 of them...but they were awhile ago so I can't remember what... I DO remember some stuff on my mates desk LOOKED (from a distance) like something on my desk at home which I wanted partway through the sesh for some reason so I asked my mate to get my thing and he just replied "what the fuck are you talking about? Thats MY desk and thats a toothbrush with a rag behind it that I use to clean the car with!" DAMN...I felt daft
I thought my british voice was my asian voice and after 20 minutes of talking in my "asian" voice i was like "wait... Thats a british voice..."
I thought the movie Limitless was a commentary on the world's dependency for resources while simultaneously documenting a drug user's dependency for drugs. Then I realized I was just really baked. Did a similar analysis for Texas Chainsaw Massacre which made a lot of sense at the time but I forget what I actually said. Probably because I was kushed out.
One time me and my buddyI thought a grocery bag stuck to a four foot tree stump was a four foot tall rabbit and It sketched us out and we ran for like 20 mins str8 but that was only my third time gettin baked and I was sooooo high
theres a certain road thats covered by trees where i live... when i drive on it stoned as hell at night.. the shadows from the trees (light coming from my headlight) looked like animals running across the street right in front of me... freaks me out every time.. always looks so real.. but i figure.. if its a real animal, fuck it.. not worth swerving into a tree to save a critter's life.
After a month long t-break for the first time in a year, I blazed up multiple bong bowls with some friends. I thought all the fucking bushes/trees I saw were oversized nugs until I touched them, then I was like, "nah man I knew that shit Im just high Im good" then would freak out 5 minutes later. Ahh ahh low tolerance
one time we were walking to my friends house on a trail and apparently his mom was walking the dog and she ended up behind us and i turn around and i thought it was a cop so i just start booking it and then my 2 other friends get scared to and start running so they start screaming after me and i end up running 10 minuites away hiding under a log. my friend had to explain to his mom we were just exercising XD
Every time i go for a blunt walk around my neighborhood at night, Ill think that a mailbox is a person from far away.