I think i'm schizophrenic?? help

Ok so for the about two months now i've been testing all different meds for my supposed OCD, social anxiety, bi ploar, and depressioin. They work for a week then do nothing. Also they tried SSRI's which just made me homocidal and i actually scared myself while on them.

So i have had a suspicion that i am scizo for a long time and here's my list of "symptoms"

THESE SYMPTOMS VARY IN INTENSITY FROM DAY TO DAY THEY ARE NOT ALWAYS AS STRONG AS I DESCRIBE THEM IN THIS LIST THEY GO UP AND DOWN IN FLARES FROM DAY TO DAY.

voices- usualy 1 and myself talking, rarely there will be 1 man 1 woman talking.

a voice will always try and convince me to hurt others or hurt myself in sick and demented ways this happens daily but i can control it.

the voice tuants me in social situations and tells me what he thinks other people are thinking when they look at me then tells me to hurt the person for it. Also when i try to do something diffficult like on a game, or at work, or w/e it taunts me.
(the taunting usually results in my "anxiety attacks")

i'm very paranoid of people and authority it's unrational but i can't help myself

ringing in ears

uncontrollable body movements/facial expressions. I do this alot and don't know it until someone asks me WTF i'm doing

I make uncontrollable weird noises at random times sometimes very inappropriate times and i don't even know i did it.

I always make up fake words to mean something and use them in regular convo by accident

i have some teddy bears which in my mind have their own personality, voice, demeanor, and i talk to them in my head. I know it's not real but i can't stop it. These feels are strong enough to make me almost cry if i mis treat them, which i havn't cried in 2 years, not by choice i just can't to put it simply

My thought and decision make processes are identical to my friend stephenn's i mean like scary identical we're like mental twins and he is highly schizo

I have a very socially withdrawan attitude, i never show emotion, i don't feel much emotion, i have large depression problems, just alot of typical schizo type emotional problems. i laugh when people cry and i find violence humorous, not by choice it just makes me laugh very hard. Alot of people find this inapporpriate.

I was huanted as a kid and the "ghost" has followed me my whole life although i've rarely seen it since i was about 12 but i surely believed i was strongly haunted for about 6 years, hearing foot steps, voices, shower running by itself, seeing apparitions.

Sometimes i'll get an extreme urge to walk to another town, to punch a window out, to drive my car into a wall, to stab my girlfriend, to jump and kick n scream, to rock back and forth just random things but they are hard to control my body when i get these urges. I have come close to shooting 2 friends while hunting because i thought they were laughing at me from about 400 yards away, i had it loaded and dead o my cousins head until i realized what i was doing.

sometimes i'll respond to the voice in my head verbally, usually telling it to stop or stfu.

And last but not least, whenever i think about telling my psychiatrist i get the overwhelming feeling that i'm making htis up, or that he won't believe me, or that i'm just stupid and wanting attention, or i'm really really crazy and the voice will push those ideas to the point where i second guess myself and just get really depressed for being an idiot.

Can someone who is schizo or is a doc please give me some insight into if i'm making this up in my head or if i have a legitamate concern here? i'm so confilcted and lost i feel like a fucking retard just for typing this because i keep thinking i'm bullshitting you all even though i know for a fact it's true.

Sorry if my grammar is off i am really shakey and it was kinda hard to type

 

Thanks man i think i'm gonna finally grow some balls and tell my doc on my next appointment. Funny thing is from the outside i seem so idk well off. I'm pretty smart i'm good at making speeches and communicating with people, do good in school all that which makes trying to tell anyone close to me that i think this is a possibilty so much harder.