I saw Mommy whipping Santa Claus...

At the dinner table last night, my daughter (who's 6) was talking about Christmas protocol, specifically as it relates to the correlation between presents and behavior. She took a sip of milk and then said, "Jack's mom was REALLY bad last year!"

"Really?"

"She got lots of bad stuff. Not coal, but other bad stuff."

"Bad stuff? Like what?" I asked, thinking of how house slippers and gloves must be to moms as socks and neckties are to dads.

"What are those things?" she asked. She started motioning with her fist. "Those things people use to punish themselves? They hit their backs."

"Oh yeah," I said, my eyes widening involuntarily as I struggled to suppress a snicker. "Sort of like a little whip?"

"Yeah, and she got a BIG whip too! And handcuffs for when she's bad. And a dog collar!"

"Wow. No coal huh?"

"I don't think so."

"Huh. Well I bet she learned her lesson."

"I bet!"

 

It's going to be veeeeeeery difficult to keep a straight face the next time I see Jack's mom at the bus stop.