I was born with anxiety disorder, and a very unsupportive family. When I was young, I was afraid. I was afraid to try new things, afraid to talk to people, afraid to work hard. I remember being very young and my parents signing me up for basketball camp. I was afraid, and refused to participate, just standing in one corner until it was over. I spent most of my time watching TV, using the computer, playing gameboy, doing nothing useful, not excercising or learning anything. This continued until high school. I always blamed high school for my problems. Back then I thought that the teachers were mean, people were mean and unfriendly, and that how I did academically did not matter. I expected people to talk to me first, I was not friendly, and again, I was afraid. At the end of high school, I was a nobody. I never want to dances, football games, never made a single friend I can hang out with today. Looking back, I realized that I was the problem, and I ruined high school. Going into college I tried to change, but just couldnt shake the habit of being afraid. I was getting better, but I still expected people to say hi first, people to talk to me first... And most of all, I blew my studies off. In college, short cuts are NOT the way to go. Cramming is a waste of tuition. Skipping classes defeated the purposed of even going to college in the first place. This past quarter, my GPA was a 0.92. So goodbye future. I am the worst person I could possibly be, and I have let myself and my friends, family down. The worst feeling ever is regret, and not being able to change your own mistakes in the past. When you have any opportunity, you must take it. When you have free time, do something productive, learn something new, connect with more people. And do not be like me and pussy out of everything possible.
Just relax man. Reality is something we all place value on, however the real value is in our interpretation of reality. What is positive or negative depends not on reality, but on how we interpret it. If you think about it, you can be happy no matter what your situation is as long as you can have good control over how you think. It takes practise. But if you master it you can do anything.
It's easy for someone to say, "don't blow the opportunity", but some aren't even aware that an opportunity is actually present. You may think that your life is bad now, but you can't view it as a timeline all the way to your death. You're not gonna be a loser all your life, and you're not a loser at all even though you think you are. You are, who you are. There's nothing that gets more true than that, believe it. Even though you think you're a pussy loser, you're actually not. I bet that if you saw some man lying on the sidewalk at night, while it's raining, I bet that you would help that man with whatever issues that he had. As long as your a helpful man, who cares for other people and doesn't care for only his own benefit, I think you'll be okay. Go to a bar...meet new people and just be confident. Just do it and stop thinking about it, and if you fuck up then just try it again somewhere else. You're not in high school anymore, you're in the world, so go do whatever the fuck you want regardless of how other people think of you!
damn man it sounds like you just need someone to help you through some issues and feelings and shit and sometimes it helps if its someone you dont know, pm me if you want, we can text or something but that post scares me that you might do something stupid like hurt yourself. idk i might sound like a fag or whatever for saying this but im forreal if you want to talk to somebody pm me
Nah man I was just like you. Maybe not the most anti social person but I only hung out with a few. I always expected people to say wassup to me first. Even females. I would not try to go after females in high school because I was scared of rejection. I always thought I was too good to go after females like most people do but then I came to realize that the only way to get laid was to chase after the cat. My first year of college I feel in love with a chick that put me in friendzoned. I was blinded by the fact that I thought she was going to eventually feel the same way I felt, but it never happened. Got distracted by smoking waaaay to much.. well not probably waaay too much but I hung out with the wrong group of people who didn't give a shit about college and I knew deep down inside that I wanted to do something better in my life. So I stopped and went back home. Came back home and it just wasn't the same. I began to think that the people I used to hang out with in highschool were against me. Thought they hated me and wanted to hurt me but began to think it was just ME that was feeling this way towards them. It just wasn't the same. So I stopped smoking because I felt smoking really was the main problem. Got my life back straight, started working and eventually went back to college. Now I'm still trying to adjust to chasing after girls. Just being myself, and not trying to impress anyone. I never had a REAL relationship with any girl before. I've had my fair share of flings in the past but feelings weren't involved. I just want that one chick that's down for me, and accepts me for me. one that doesn't try to go out her way to impress me because I ain shit.. Got this 1 virgin chick that just goes out her way man. Comes from a clean cloth but still wants the rough neck in me. Don't see it happening though because shes a fucking sketch ball to the max and shes just overall not my type.. But I'm to blame because I was trying to take that V card but it just won't happen so I gave up.. Now I'm just kickin it with a few chicks that maybe potential GFs but I'm not wife'n up nothing until I know its real.. The moral is, be yourself. Don't try to overdue something or force something that's just not there. Everyone has been through a rough part of their life. Sounds like you just need a friend to talk to. I'm pretty sure your school probably has some type of counseling, so I would suggest you go there and talk to them. They will understand your pain, and maybe you can over come the fear of being successful. If you need anything else you're always welcome to the city, you can even PM me if you want. Sorry for the long post btw. Keep yah head up homie
