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I never thought I'd be in this situation....

Discussion in 'Apprentice Marijuana Consumption' started by Seus, Aug 19, 2008.

  1. #1 Seus, Aug 19, 2008
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 19, 2008
    So I'm self employed so I toke pretty much 5-7 nights a week. Usually 1-3 puffs at a time...well my father wants me to get a life insurance policy. So I go see the guy he's known for something like 30 years, and he tells me they come to my house to take my blood and urine sample. He told me they even check the urine on site for the correct temperature. Initially I was thinking, what the fuck, I never thought i'd be in this situation. Well here I am. I know I've read before on here what people have done. Work out a lot, eat healthy, drink a shit ton of water, etc. etc. I'm pretty thin, so it's not like I have a ton of fat build up and just laden with THC. My question is this, has anyone ever had to do this type of test before, and if so, did you pass by doing the work out / water routine? or would the whizzinator be the way to go? Mind you this is a $1,000,000 policy and I'm sure the company isn't fucking around when they do this. Thoughts?:confused:

    remind you, I think I can put this thing off for anywhere from 1-3 weeks....fuck them...I'll take the time necessary :)
  2. When are they coming/Can you stall for time?
  3. yeah say you have a conflicting appointment with the time they want to come, ask them if it would be alright if you reschedule a week or so later
  4. Im sure they wont watch you pee. Obtain some clean urine, and keep it on a heating pad hidden somewhere in the bathroom.
  5. Is this a blood and urine test for simple reasons of your overall health?

    Are they even going to be testing for drug use has that been said already?
  6. id try that first...
  7. good point. ask as many questions as you can first, and then slip in smoothly the "what are the urine sample and blood tests testing for?"
  8. Pretty sure it's to test for drug use. There are many drugs other than weed and just about all of them can kill you.
  9. if ur skinny... drinking shitloads of cranberry juice and water and eating semi - healthy and working out here and there should get it out of ur system in 3 weeks

    good luck
  10. 3 weeks?? man damn it...I was actually thinking of planning a trip to Amsterdam around that whatever I do, I'll have to do this before I go there and just hope for the best I guess...

    Does anyone know if the whizzinator works? or if they can detect its urine?
  11. Is the UA a drug test or just that, a urine analysis?
    Just cause you have to piss in a cup doesn't mean you're being tested for drugs.

    I duno how health insurance companies work and if drug testing is part of normal procedure.
  12. #13 DMG_KUSH, Aug 19, 2008
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 19, 2008
    Found this on Yahoo Answers:

    Here is a complete explanation of a life insurance blood test. It does look into any illegal substances, any prescription medication and any health conditions you may have. They can and do test for alcohol and drugs in the urine.

    A Life Insurance Blood Test is performed for the purpose of evaluating the risk to the life insurance company of offering you life insurance protection.

    There are many possible reasons for differences in life insurance blood test results. Consult with your personal Physician for a diagnosis of any medical condition. If you have any questions or concerns about the blood test results, contact your personal Physician.

    Glucose is a measure of your blood sugar level. Blood sugar levels may vary depending upon the time of your most recent meal. High levels of blood sugar may occur in people with diabetes.

    Fructosamine Glycated Albumin (AGP)
    Hemoglobin A1C
    Fructosamine and glycated albumin tests estimate your average blood sugar levels over a 2-3 week period prior to the blood draw and testing of your blood. Hemoglobin A1C (not performed on all applicants) is a test for estimating your average blood sugar over the preceding 4-6 weeks. Hogher levels may be seen in people with diabetes.

    Blood Urea Nitrogen (BUN
    Blood urea nitrogen and creatine tests are tests of kidney function. High levels of urea nitrogen and creatine may occur in people who have kidney disease, but there are other possible causes, too.

    Alkaline Phosphatase
    Alkaline phosphatase is an enzyme found primarily in bone and liver. Higher levels of alkaline phosphates may occur in people with certain bone or liver diseases, but higher levels may occur in adolescents and pregnant women.

    Total Bilirubin
    Bilirubin is produced by the liver, primarily as a breakdown product of red blood cells. Higher levels of bilirubin may occur with certain benign congenital metabolic conditions, but may also be seen in blood disease or liver diseases.

    SGOT (AST)
    SGPT (ALT)
    Gamma Glutamyltransferase (GGT)
    SGOT, SGPT, and GGT are all enzymes that are primarily produced in the liver, but may occur in blood cells, muscle tissue, and other tissues. Higher levels of these enzymes in your blood may occur in a variety of liver disorders, as well as other conditions.

    Total Protein
    Albumin and globulin are two types of proteins that circulate in the bloodstream. Total protein includes both albumin and globulin. Blood protein levels can be abnormal in a wide variety of conditions.

  13. what the fuck does that have to do with life insurance?
  14. Well if he's done so many drugs he's going to die tommorow, it probably wouldn't be a wise investment to give someone life insurance.
  15. they would tell you if they were gonna "drug test" you.
  16. Exactly...

    I read that thing on yahoo answers. I read somewhere else (I believe that they usually just test for Cocaine, Heroin and Nicotine. I guess the only way I'll know is if I ask them I guess.

    What was kinda cool was this though on Erowid:

  17. Well I've done quite a bit of research and did even order the test yourself kits. (only $3 each). Basically, I went on a super healthy diet for 2 weeks...exercised for nearly every day the first week. Drank 1 large bottle of smartwater per day at a minimum.

    After the 1 week, I would test negative for THC with the tests. I tested myself 3 days in a row, and all tests were negative. I even threw in a different brand of test to be sure the main ones I was using weren't messed up.

    Yesterday(Tuesday) I worked out and then tested later that day, and DID test positive for THC.

    I still have 3 more days until the test, so no working out before the test, and drink tons of water. I have 2 more tests left, so I plan on using one each day. I'll post the results after I'm done.
  18. yea keep me updated man, really wanna hear the results
  19. passed this test with flying the preferred non-tobacco policy....

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