I NEED to stop smoking and have wasted hundred of dollars worth of weed on trial and error

Okay, so I am having a LOT of really SHIT luck trying to find a method to decarb my weed that WORKS, I bought a machine to take away the guesswork, and THAT damned thing did not work either. I bought a candy thermometer to test it. Most people say you need 230 degrees f at a bare minimum for a complete decarb-- this one was supposed to run at 225, and you know what? I tested it with the candy thermometer it stays at 185.
Oven decarb? NO. Absultely no prescision control over temperature. It's a GAS oven and that fluctuates in temperature anyway and I've read that toaster ovens are also unreliable.
In addition I live at 4,500 feet elevation and used to live at 7,000 feet. I'm convinced that altitude effects the chemical reaction, but there is ZERO information on high altutude decarboxylation.
ANYWHERE!!!!!!
ANYWHERE ON THE INTERNET!!!!!!
I've tried citric acid extractions and am INSANELY ANNOYED at the LACK of information. NOBODY give the PH of the solution to be used. Does the process work if the cannabis is dry or does it need to be soaking in a solution? One method says to saturate your solution and cover it until it is wet-- the majority of the time, therefore it is a sticky pulp (I suspect "sticky" prevents oxygen from doing it's job) or a dry powder.
Can you over decarb with ctric acid or does the process work only for THCA--->THC and can not yield THC----> CBN?
Many of the citric acid methods say to add ethanol or additional acid like lemon juice or vinegar. Again-- KNOWING THE CORRECT PH WOULD HELP.
Also some of these methods say that adding heat, typically 180 degrees for 15 minutes "greatly speeds up the process." BUT ABSOLUTELY NONE will tell you BY HOW MUCH TIME.
I suspect if there's anything to this method, you can decarb at a much lower temperature.
Also, if anyone directs me to a recipe that says to use 15 GRAMS OF WEED FOR A SINGLE SERVING, I shall be greatly upset at you. I don't understand why so many recipes call for so much weed-- .
Back to citric acid method. Says the yield is a water soluable form of THC.
Well WHAT IS IT CALLED THEN? THC-citrate? Can't be. I read somewhere that cannibanoids do not form salts in acids, but esters (not esthers) .
If it is water soluable, does that mean it will hit you quicker or come on if you hold it in your mouth? Nothing sublingual has worked for me yet, yet many people say the citric acid method has this advantage.
I AM NOT LOOKING FOR ANY CONVENTIONAL WAY TO MAKE EDIBLES. I DO NOT EAT SUGAR, CARBOHYDRATES OR INDUSTRIALLY PROCESSED OILS AND I FAST. IDEALLY I WILL EAT ONLY THREE TIMES A WEEK AND REMAIN FASTED MOST OF THE TIME. I HAVE ZERO INTEREST IN A BROWNIE RECIPE. I'M AFTER BASIC KITCHEN CHEMISTRY.
I really want to get citric acid to work because if I can filter out the liquid and dry the resulting yield into a powder, I could mix it with artificially sweetener, tang and baking soda to create fizzy drink tablets that get you stoned!
But also because it seems like it should be very easy if it works.
I've been searching for weeks and I've gone through 3/4 of an ounce of weed so far getting shit that mostly doesn't work.
I used to use the confit method, but that is supposed not to work. Well, it did, but I never could get the resulting oil to give me a high enough yield to make it MORE active than smoking. Properly decarbed weed is supposed to require LESS weed to get high, not MORE, right?
Am I immune to edibles? Nope. When I buy THC capsules they work anywhere between 80-120 miligrams for me. THAT IS COSTLY. I finally found SUPER CHEAP FLOWER and I'll be DAMNED if I'm going to go bankrupt spending 3 times as much as I have to to get something that works by mouth.
This is a dedicated WEED forum, so there SHOULD BE enough expertise here to fix my issue.
There SHOULD BE answers enough already that I didn't even need to post a new thread.
But here we are.
I literally spent my last penny on weed every month until I found a dispensary that sells $100 ounces. THERE IS NO WAY IN HELL I'm going to pay upwards of $20/100miligrams of THC for edibles.
I'm finally able to spend my money on stuff other than weed: BUT I'm SICK OF COUGHING MY GUTS OUT AND HAVING CHUNKY PHLEGM CONSTANTLY FILLING MY THROAT!!!!!!!!!!!
But seriously DO NOT direct me to that stupid tea recipie that calls for 15 grams of weed for a single serving.
The dispensary that will sell me decarbed flower is going to get ALL of my business, I think it would be reasonable to pay an extra $20 to have them do it for you, but I am not down for edibles that are treated like a dining experience for novices. I have a pretty high tollerence. If I can get baked out om mind on a 1/2 gram joint, I should be able to get baked out of my mind out of 1/2 a gram of decarbed weed.
I want a definitive failsafe method. Repeatability is the hallmark of science. There isn't even a consensus on whether citric acid works or not.
20 years ago I could have found everything I needed to know on google in five minutes. Now it is a god damned wild goose chase.
I'm having to ask people directly for things that used to be answered by UTFSE.
UTFSE is dead. I need reliable, consistant answers, and I want as much basic chemistry about it as I can get, to trlu undtand the process and see how I might imporvae it.sre

 

Please actually READ THE POST. OVEN is the VERY LEAST reliable method. I'm not going to repeat myself AS TO WHY THIS IS THE CASE. NOT DONE.
In fact I can find THAT information in 30 seconds ANYWHERE. The fact that I am doing this and NOT enjoying anything but wasted weed and wasted money pretty much aught to tell you I'm looking for SOMETHING ELSE.
Next please.

 

I'm sorry, Blix but #1 it seems to be the general consensus that weed will not fully decarb at less than 230 degrees, AND, as I said, I can not follow recipies that work at sea level. Water boils at 202 degrees where I live and 212 degrees at sea level. If there is a reliable way to scale the time needed to my altitude, I'm willing to try this method, but I don't want to waste anymore weed.

 

Ah yes! I've seen many things about decarbing cannabis oil, but I wanted to use flower. But this RSO seems to be something I can make out of flower? This method attracted me because you can monitor the process and stop it once it stops bubbling. I had to look it up, RSO. "Rick Simpson Oil."
Time to crack the books and see if I cam make the oil then try your method!!!!! VERY good answer, I apreciate it, and I do even appreciate the answers that won't work for me.
The idea that weed is already decarbing from the atmospheric oxygen is a REALLY good indicator of why I control EVERYTHING as much as I can according to known times and temps and it STILL doesn't work. That is very reasonable and I think your method is probably the ONLY method that I can use to be sure to decarb EXACTLY enough and not too much!!!!!!

 

Seems to be that altitude will not effect anything besides the boiling temperature of water. I'm pretty sure that the $100 / gram weed at the dispensary is sold at that price because it is old. Therefore all of my methods are failing because I am over decarbing!
"Decarbing is sensitive proces. It occurs naturally when the plant starts to dry out. So it's hard to estimate the perfect time as it depends on when the plant was harvested. So to achieve optimal decarb you need to see it visually happening in front of you. That's why I decarb the final RSO instead of first decarbing your weed. Once I have the RSO in metal dish, I put the metal dish I hot oil bath warmed up to 240-250F. The RSO will start to bubble. Wait - it will stop bubbling. At this point, stir it with small fork - you will see it will start to bubble intensieve again. Wait until you see only small (really small) bubbles when you stir - this is the optimal decarb."
Totally makes sense. Is there some way we can put to be weather or not it is possible to achieve complete decarboxilation at temperatures lower than 230? Some people use a crock pot and do it at 200 degrees for hours. They claim it works. All I know is there's way too many different opinions on this and I am DONE with tiral and error unless I get bales and bales of free weed to experiment with.

 

Yes, everyone says that's the one that works. I bought a cheap lousy one that says it only gets to 225 degrees (already 5 degrees too low) and ACTUALLY heats my cannabis to 185. Wish I'd held out for the Ardent. They have a good review and I would have made up for the extra cost in weed not wasted. I went through 3/4 of an ounce and got high TWICE off what I made.
Rick Simpson seems to be the method I'm looking for. I didn't put it all together until now.
I've taken the 150 miligrams of cannabis/citric acid that I made and watching the foam forming, tried to gage by eye when it seemed to not generate any co2, which is what I'll be doing when I try making RSO.
My test material is not yet a week old, but I've heard it can be active in as little as 3 days. Yesterday's batch did nothing. I simmered this time for 5 minutes. Was going to do it for longwer, but looking at the froth on top, I got excited. We'll see how it does. By Tuesday I'll have a chance to better test my citric acid extracts. RSO is definitely in my future. I used to buy lecetin all the time to mix with kava, so that won't be hard to do.

 

Right, well I did find out about "Cannabis oil" and that you could get visual confirmation by watching the bubbles, but I had not heard the term RSO, and I thought it was something I was going to have to buy. My chief motive is I'm not wanting to go broke and flower is dirt cheap.
I think the reason I'm not getting predictable results is not the oven method per se, but the fact that I have no idea how much of the weed I'm buying has already decarbed just from being old. Looks a lot like stuff I used to do when I made various herbal extracts.
I think it will be worth getting a crock pot, because it looks very doable, and being able to monitor the reaction visually is a HUGE plus.