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I need help/advice! (Sad Story)

Discussion in 'Seasoned Marijuana Users' started by TerrBear, Aug 18, 2008.

  1. Hello guys, I need advice/help if any. This has to do with MJ and a girlfriend.

    So i have been dating my girlfriend for 10 months now, and last year around october is when I started dating her. About a month and a half into our relationship, I had been smoking mj around her numerous times, and with friends, and having a good time, she didn't mind it at all, but she didn't smoke. Mind you she used to smoke for all of her highschool career. Her dad tokes up all the time in his garage with her mom, and we laugh all the time cause her dad is funny. One time on my way to my best friend's house who I have been tokin with for the longest time growing up. She texted me saying she didnt want me smoking anymore. I was confused and didn't know what to do, so when i got to scotts, I was completely confused and I wouldn't take a hit and scott thought something was wrong with me or something. Months after that I couldn't handle not tokin alil bit every once in awhile, for my migraines and asthma. I would have to do it when she wasn't around, so that way I wouldnt have to worry. Then I just randomly quit for months because I thought she was catching onto me. It has been 10 months now, and in those last 5 months of not toking, not seeing my best friends who I always toked with and had amazing times, not being able to do much at all because she is always with me and she doesnt like many of my friends anymore. I just recenetly started tokin again when shes not around, and so far so good. I just want to know any advice on what I should do to hopefully get her to come to her senses that tokin mj is not bad for anything, I have never flipped on her while high or anything, ive always been chill, everything has gone smoothly.. and she worries about me, and thats why she doesnt want me smoking mj, especially with my friends. I can respect that, but hey I had a life with my friends and she should have a life with her friends so we can all just do what we want and still have a healthy relationship where nobody is worrying about the opposite person. It almost seems impossible to just sit her down and talk with her about it, without her getting upset.

    Thats the story basically.

    :(
     
  2. just talk to her i guess and see whats so worng with you tokin and ask here why she feels this way and talk it out
     
  3. dude, if you don't stand up for yourself, girls will rule your life. Just because you get a little action in the bed here and there does NOT mean you should compromise your lifestyles, attitude, friends. its not worth it. You may think you love them or whatever you say it is, but half the time you are blinded by other things.

    my .02
     
  4. #4 Ganjafarmer421, Aug 18, 2008
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 18, 2008
    im gonna have to go with elevatedgaze on this one. If you see yourself with this girl for a while longer then try to work things out. If not tell her to go fuck herself, politely. Getting pussy whipped is not that fun, getting un-pussy whipped sucks balls, big hairy balls.
     
  5. There is nothing healthy about a relationship in which you need to change yourself for the other person.

    I had a gf the same way, and once it was over (after over a year) I was much better off. And now will never make that mistake again.
     
  6. My girlfriend doesn't want me smoking either, it's trash. I've explained everything to her but she thinks I'm just someone who smokes all day, everyday. I understand why THAT would be bad, but I smoke only a few times a week and I see no problem with it whatsoever.

    I told her that I'm still going to smoke as much as I do now (occasionally) and if she can't live with that, then her loss.

    I like her a lot, so I hope she just understands one day. Hell, I've smoked with her and she didn't seem to think it was that bad until like 3 weeks ago.
     
  7. I can relate to this in a way, My advice would be to keep toking..honestly why is it a problem now but it wasnt when you were first together?
     
  8. you gotta sit her down and talk about what's important in your lives, it may not necessarily be weed, but talk about your friendships that have been changed for the worse, and how you've lost sleep from migraine's and such, exaggerate a little, but try to be on the level, ask her if there's any middle ground you two could seek, etc
     
  9. so basically, you can keep your nuts and still smoke? or be with this one chick and not be free to do what you want. plenty of fish in the sea bro
     
  10. Don't change who you are for someone else, unless YOU think its the best descision.

    There will always be more girls, and ones who will enjoy toking up with their man instead of trying to own you.
     
  11. #11 christian999, Aug 19, 2008
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 19, 2008
    dump the ho.nobody should change the way you are and should fucking except it or brake up.now i would be suprised if your friends would take you back after abandoning them for some tail
     
  12. I had the same problem. except I can't help but get caught every few months. So one time when she found some I just said:" I'm not going to quit. I wanted to because of you but it never lasts very long. The longest I went was was a couple of months without it. I'm tired of living a lie and I don't like lying to you. To my amazment she said: "ok, well I will keep an open mind this time and we'll see how it goes."

    It was a great day my friend.
     
  13. sounds like shes begun the ball cutting...i'd explain it once more, and if that doesn't work i'd get the hell out of there while you can still think independent thoughts.
     
  14. #14 HoosierIVXX, Aug 19, 2008
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 19, 2008
    lmao.

    By the way, OP if this is a sad story, I'd hate to see a personal disaster for you ;)
     
  15. dont let your women change anything about who you are, and the things you seem to enjoy
     
  16. It may hurt to say this, but any relationship where a person needs to change for another is no relationship to be in. If you find smoking is that much of a problem between you two, then her hypocrisy will be her own downfall. Be true to yourself. Most people already know what to do, they just need the push in the right direction. Good luck, brother.
     

  17. QFE. If you have to change for someone else, then that just means you weren't the right person for them in the first place.
     
  18. As much as I hate quoting e-Harmony commercials, they do have a point:

    "It's all about compatibility."

    Luck should be in there too. But the point remains valid.
     
  19. Thanks for all the help and advice guys, I do have to say that i see myself with her for a long time, I will soon here just have to sit her down and talk despite if she gets upset or not. Hell if I get caught one day, i have many excuses. I work at a concert hall, a very popular one at that, all the crew I work with, all my friends on staff, and even bands that come through smoke weed with me and everyone. She will know soon im sure, but she really does want me in her life, and she will just have to except the fact that I do smoke every once in awhile to just relax and forget about the pains and aches of working, paying bills, school work, migraines, and everything else. Ive told her before that smoking herb will never change who i am for her, but we will see how she reacts i guess.

    Thanks again,
    T
     
  20. my girlfriend ignores me for a bit when I smoke, she just doesnt care about it. I like it, I say im gunna smoke and she backs off for a while then will text me later haah
     

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