I'm not sure where to start or what i'm even trying to accomplish from this thread, i just have no one to talk to, i'm really lost, and have nothing to live for at this moment. I'm not sure what i should do, currently i wouldn't care if an Anvil just fell ontop of me in the middle of me writing this, but here is my perception on things. I grew up in a broken family, my parents gave me everything i ever wanted while they were doing construction work and college at nights while trying to raise me as well. I never had any family time, i really don't know anything about them, it's actually depressing how little i know. I'm not really included into the family because they all like going out to eat and shopping, just killing time through materialistic things. But my problem is, i don't care about materialistic things but i just want them so i won't be judged. Currently i'm driving an 03 nissan altima, i like the car, great car, it's just right now is the only time of my life where i wont be tied down to a relationship, woman, child, where i can have a two seater coupe. The Altima however has a couple problems, i was picking up my sister from school one day and i was stopped at a red light, someone hit me from behind and an Emergency truck pulled up and told us to park somewhere else so we are off the road from interrupting cars. This is where i didn't get any witnesses, so the cop comes shes trying to say shes not sure how she hit me, i give it to my dad the ticket because we change insurance companies and i'm not sure how to handle it. Turns out it isn't gonna be handled, her company doesn't want to pay since there conflicting sides to the story and i'm -$750. Then there is also on the side panel right before the passenger door, my dad backed up in his car and hit it. I'm probably facing $2,000 worth of damages and i'm not sure what to do. I know my car is fine, it runs, it gets me from point a to point b, but i have no drive in my life, no cause, no purpose, no family, and barely any friends. I just don't want to be the guy who is ostracized for no reason, it's not because i'm a nerd, i'm just not into the same things everyone else is and i don't feel like being a target for them. It's not even that i'm scared i'll be picked on or whatever, i just kind of want to be the man a little bit where people don't even think of judging you. I don't know, i'm really lost and have been contimplating suicide all day, i know how stupid of a reason this sounds but really all i ever had my whole life was my dog before he died and now my car that really mean anything to me. I never had relationships with people to care about, just a dog and a car.... how pathetic.