my mom is so fucking awesome. i love her. sometimes i feel horrible that i have to be a fucking druggy. its not her fault. she raised me the right way. she doesnt understand my problems. i feel awful. my parents are so nice to me because they feel theyre responsible, but theyre not. its all on me. one day i hope that it changes and it doesnt have to be this way. how do i let her know that i love her and its not her fault because i see the look of hopelessness on her face sometimes and it pains me. i cant stop using because im miserable without it but i cant keep on going like this. someone help me. i just want my mom to know that one day everything will be alright and we can go back to the good old days. my parents dont deserve this. theyre good people, on the older side, but still really good people who always did their best. im sorry mom, i never wanted to do this to you. im sorry if this post sounds really pathetic, im just a little drunk here on this monday afternoon, but i need help. i feel like dont deserve to be their son anymore so gc help me out what do i do to let my parents know that one day things will be different. you dont really have to answer this. im just venting really, hoping it will all change soon enough. peace homies
If possible, as it looks like eventually you are going to be making a conscious effort to alter your ways, skip the 'eventually' part. I'm not kidding, either. Put everything down, talk to your Mom and say, "Listen, I understand that I haven't been the greatest son for (however long), but I'm done with it all now, etc. etc." Whatever it is you want to say. Beyond that, you could simply tell her that you are motivated enough to begin changing your habits, but nothing says that you are actually doing so than, well, doing so.
I don't know what you want to hear. You already know that the solution to this problem is to stop using. It's no longer managable and it has become a destructive influence on your relationships. Guilt won't help, but figuring out a way to live without drugs will. There's nothing stopping you from changing right now except you, and if you don't stop, all you will find is self loathing, a further degraded relationship with your mom and a worse problem.
i love my mom too. i kicked my H habit because i saw how it made my mom feel. i hope you can improve your relationship with her because im sure she would love to spend more time with you.
I don't know how you live your life but the way it sounds you might just need to take some time and just get your priorities straight. Family always comes first. "Because a man who doesn't spend time with his family can never be a real man." -The Godfather- And you don't need to worry a mother will always love her son no matter what. As for her being proud of you, that is something that needs to be earned. Take some time and think it over. Best of Luck.
Actions speak louder than words man, show her some steps towards success and make her as proud as you can.
my H habit got worse after i lost my mom. Now im seeing how much its affecting my dad and i wanna stop so bad but its so freakin hard. Be thankful u still have your mom, so do whatever u gotta do to make her proud!