so if anyone here is sick of me already, they know i'm trying to figure out casual sex and dating and blah blah blah. but things are now set up to (hopefully) work out splendidly. i met the greatest guy. at a meeting for the Nebraska Cannabis Coalition/NORML. so we met a while ago, february, and at the meeting i totally was crushin' on him. super cute, gorgey eyes, totally sexy bawd. he talked about going to the capitol and giving opposition for some bills/laws that would further strangle the legalization movement. the entire time he was talking, all i could think was 'i would definitely love to sit down with him and toke sometime'. at the end i introduced myself and was all shy but told him i'd see him again, and we agreed to add each other on facebook. so...time passes...i am meeting losers...seeing this stoner dream guys FB status updates and wishing i was in his league to talk to him...meeting more losers...and i finally did it. i just FB chatted him and said "i hope this is not inappropriate but i would love to smoke and bowl and chill with you sometime very soon." and he said yes!! so last night, i head to his pad at 11, and when i get there his room mates smoke us out, and he smokes us all out, and we all generally have a good time. at one point he invited me to sleep over, and i said i'd love to, but i wouldn't have sex. he was totally sexy about it, and said "i respect that and would love to wait for that." so we head to bed, and still haven't kissed yet. he is so fucking attractive. he asks me what i'm looking for, and i told him a guy to commit to without being attached to. that i am busy, and my life is strange, so i can't date, but i also told him if we began to "see each other" i would stop with other guys that way (which i will of course) and he said "same". anyone think we can really make this work? i do. just don't get with anyone else, and don't fall head over heels. anyhow and then we made out and got all but my panties naked and had a fucking hot mack...also gave him a beej...does that count as sex? meh. plus, he has a mighty dick. i'm so stoked to do the deed hahah. then fell asleep in his arms and we spent all day together today (his roomies around too). just totally chill. no like awkwardness, no stress. i can't believe this happened!! this is the first time i have just put my feelings out there, and it worked out so well! i can't stop smiling. so at this point, while i'm still single, i am giving my attention and affection to only one person instead of searching for it from a buncha boner headed dicks. we might date officially someday...? we are both very busy, so it is actually fine with me if we don't become a couple as long as im not getting sloppy seconds, since i won't be giving them to him. i just am so happy that i met a wonderful pothead activist hotass to chill with. and again, so surprised that i put myself out there like that. im so shy, i don't usually talk to boys first. plus, the rave i worked at saturday night went awesome. i didn't mokey with anyone coz i was thinking of my stoner possibility guy i'm feeling awesome. oh and first time i have used a gas mask to smoke, with a steam roller, holy shit so good. all in all a wonderful development here in the cornfields...
you already sound like you emotionally attached to this dude. it will not work the way you hope it will.
no but the thing is i want to be. i dont want meaningless intimacy. i am happy to have met someone in my same situation, wanting that connection without that crazy label to make things all stupid.
lmao no offense but this kind of mentality cracks me up. You are single, and you don't need a commitment from this guy, but you aren't going to be with anyone else and only want him to be with you while both being "single?" You realize it's the situation- not what you call it- that determines if you are single or not lol. Look, I don't want to rob you or steal from you, I just want you to give me all your money whether you'd like to or not
im 20, is it coz i dont capitalize? right now my right wrist is also fractured so i type at a minimum effort level so uh fuck you. It's Best to Just say Nothing and Report the Post...it's The Best Thing For All of Us!!! **unoit**
Well, there's your problem! Some girls think the hard to get thing is cute. But it isn't. It is a pain in the ass. And a turn off. So, tell your lady friends
I read when you first said "i wouldnt have sex" and i thought "shes nice" Then you said you blew him and i thought "shes nice"
when we guys say we want a relationship without being tied down, like waht you said in the op. that means we want the sex and can/will drop your ass like the flip of a light switch when another girl comes around. just dont get to attached to this guy right off the bat... edit: before the good guys come in, not all guys are like this.
If he's a decent human being, then he'd tell you as soon as he didn't feel the same and/or found someone else. I had a similar situation recently with some girl, we were both busy as fuck always but still tried to somewhat be exclusive without actually "dating". It went well, I enjoyed that a lot more than dating, or just being single. When the time came, we both understood & there wasn't any hard feelings since she was honest (as was I). But, it can be a little frustrating especially if you were eventually hoping for that relationship. Which it sounds like you are
good for you dude but seems like to me somebody's gonna get hurt in the end because of miscommunication. you say you "want a guy to commit to without being attached to"...those are pretty contradicting words. how can you be committed to someone if you're not attached emotionally? i can tell you have some sort of commitment complex with guys..and i see that only because i do as well. it's like you want that perfect guy and that great relationship...without labeling it as "boyfriend" and "girlfriend" because that would make things serious...which makes it much more heartbreaking when shit doesn't work out. your'e just trying to protect yourself, which is understandable, but in the end that ends up sabotaging it and hurting both people. i had something like this once. me and this guy were super into each other and things escalated quickly...but because it was my freshman year of college i wanted to keep my options open so we both agreed that we were just "having fun" and we didn't need labels to define what we had.. despite everyone asking if we were going out. this worked out great..until i realized that shit was getting a little too serious..our actions/affection toward each other indicated things were much more serious than what we claimed. there was a dissonance. so i kinda freaked out and tried ending things. shit got messy, i got annoyed, we stopped talking for a while. we're friends now but it's definitely not nearly the same as before. it's sad because he was truly my best friend before anything else...and now i've lost that. if you're not even sure what you want...it's very likely things won't work out the way you want. i think you're getting a little ahead of yourself. enjoy this hottie, build your friendship, try not to rush things, don't be too eager. shit will work out and unfold nicely if you just take your time and let things happen naturally.