Lately I've noticed that I'm putting in all the effort for me and my girlfriend's sexual relationship. I finger her, fuck her, eat her out and massage her everyday for an hour or more and she only gets me off like once or twice a week. Whenever she does give me a BJ or HJ it doesn't feel as good as I had hoped. It can be uncomfortable as her hands are sloppy on my dick and she uses her teeth on my dick... I've tried telling her it hurts and she has to do something different but she still hasn't gotten that much better. And when we fuck it's ok, but I hate condoms so I don't really have as much fun as she does. My question to you GC is how can I get my gf to just be a better sexual partner? I feel like she isn't putting in an equal effort!! Like wtf i'm frustrated
You gotta sit her down and have a serious conversation about it. There's no better way to change things than to talk it out.
I will give you the advice I give people 90% of the time: So you want to change her into a better sexual partner? Even if she starts getting better she is only going to go back into her old habits. Your girlfriend is who she is, she's not going to change, not very much anyway. STOP trying to change your partner, it only causes problems. Accept a person as they are, or leave them. Solving problems that cause arguments is a whole different story.
Dude.. just talk to her. ask her what turns her on, and tell her what turns you on. Be honest with eachother, read about how to do certain positions, and then teach eachother new moves. do what turns eachother on, if she doesnt try, find a new bitch who will lol, cuz that blows!!!!
If he doesn't try to talk it over with her, then it's definitely never going to change. Sure, she might not change either way. She might change for a while and go back to her old ways. But it could be that she honestly doesn't realize the problem and would be willing to work with the OP to fix things. He's never going to find out if they don't talk about it.
The thing is, whenever I tell her what she is doing hurts she'll apologize and just won't even touch me for a while. It's like either I suffer in silence or don't get anything from her at all. She gets discouraged too easily.
She may just be taking it the wrong way or getting embarrassed about it. Maybe explain to her sometime when you aren't mid-sex that when you say "it hurts", you aren't trying to criticize her, you're just trying to help her learn what you prefer and that you'd welcome suggestions from her as well when it comes to what she prefers. I just don't see any other solutions besides talking it out or finding another girl.
what you should try doing instead of just commenting when it's going wrong, for example how you say "it hurts" when she is basically biting your dick try saying more positive things to boost up her self confidence when she is doing something you do like! so then she will want to do more of the stuff you do like cause she knows for a fact that you like it and it doesn't surprise me that she acts the way she does when you kinda criticize her blow job giving abilities, a lot of girls are really self conscious about that kinda stuff
^^^What the above said. Try to express it to her in a way that won't hurt her confidence. Girls are complicated, but if you can figure them out and turn them on, you're golden - there's nothing better for a bj than a girl who is really into it.
Why don't you just stop catering to her every sexual need.... Your doing so wouldn't make anyone want to change it up.
Spank her and tell her, her punishment will only get worse until she learns to please you. Then have your way with her in a rough manner. Train her.
While you are massaging her, just whisper softly in her ear "Shhh.....This is gonna happen." Then stick it in!
ahhh. i have a friend like this only its less sexual and more like tedious chores. and he just does them.. lol maybe its because i just came out of a relationship where i realized i tryed to hard like this but i cant even laugh at it anymore, its starting to seriously annoy me. its like when he does it, its me doing it hahahaha. i hate it. the kids buggin he has a car but he gave his nicer(priced around 4500) car to this girl, he would drive 4 ish hours all the way her college to stay for 3 days then drive back EVERY WEEKEND( she never came down once i even said something like dude wtf.. and hes like yeah idk she doesnt like to drive late? lol idk), then dropped out of school after getting sick of the drive im assuming and moved up there(he actually missed alot of clases because he would skip fridays or mondays to get an extra day.. and hes paying for it lol, retarded).. I DONT HAVE ANY WORDS LOL. shes his first gf btw, i am actually concidering gettin the kid a good therapist to talk about this problem of letting her go(deeper than it seems). i mean its not just that i dont like her i can see his frustrations with her for endless months and he just lets them go. he said that he feels liek not enough for her because shes going to school etc, when in reality shes way below the kid, and i dont think he understands the severity of it.