I do not know what to do with my life

Discussion in 'General' started by Stoogemeister, May 11, 2010.

  1. #1 Stoogemeister, May 11, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: May 11, 2010
    I am about to graduate high school, i am not going to a big university or whatever. My only real choice is to go to culinary arts school at my local community college. I have the application all filled out and i was going to go for it, but today i saw my future.

    commuting to and from class everyday. so i can come home, sit, and be alone while my friends are off at their colleges. Eventually i would graduate from culinary arts school, be a cook, work my ass off in hot steamy kitchens, 9-5, so i can go home, sit and be alone, and continue to work and work, just for the sake of survival.

    i dont want to cook for a profession, i know many of you will say, " do what you want to do as a job" i dont fucking know what i want to do. i just want to live. i cant explain it.

    its like no matter what i imagine, i would just go to work, make money, spend money, come home, sit, be alone, go to sleep, wake up to alarms, do it all over again.

    is this really what human survival is all about now? I mean, what the FUCK. Please someone tell me there is a way out of this.

    9-5, work, drink wine, television, music, drive cars, buildings, asphalt, be alone, monotone.

    I wish i could just be a mountain man, be its just not logical, i have grown up being used to all sorts of material comfort, and it is that reason that i find living in nature to be romantic and ideal. because i really dont even know how harsh it would be.

    Fuck it. The money, the people, the systems in systems. How the fuck do i get out of here. I read about squatting, i could do that, but for how long? how would i buy food? How can i get out of this system. i dont have the money to just move out and get a place of my own. and if i did, what then? Get a job yea, work, come home, BE ALONE, WAKE UP TO ALARMS, politics, read books and smoke weed and listen to music and jack off to waste my pathetic time for the next zone.

    we will all die someday, and that will be that. Even the icons of human history, are just dead, and there legacy is left behind like old photographs.
    i do not know what to do, or what do think. This is all just, ______
  2. Welcome to life! Find things that make you happy and keep them close. You never know what the path we walk will allow us to find. Along my journey I have found many a surprise that has changed my outlook and goals...just keep on truckin' and keep your head up!
  3. Dude go drive so deep into the forest until your gas runs out and live out there.

    No rules, no money, no society telling you what you should/shouldn't be. You'd be your own man, free to do whatever you want.

    Go kill some animals and build a fire and cook them- maybe bring some seeds with you and start growing. Live how we were supposed to live, not how society thinks we should live. After all, we are all just animals.

    Here's how I look at life; We are all going to die someday, and the chances of us doing anything world-changing are extremely minimal- even if we do, the human race as a whole is going to die out some day. So everything we have worked for in our entire history is for nothing? Just live life, do what you want, have fun. This is the only one you got, make the best of it.
  4. scatfactory? really? but i like what you said. and your sig rocks. as does ASIP.

    and to the OP, unfortunately that's how life goes. it's boring and repetitive. but it is what you make of it. at least you figured this out while you were still in HS.
  5. I would say you need to find a constructive hobby you could do in that 'alone time'. Something that requires a lot of effort and provides immediate results. As an example, my hobbies include:
    -Exercise at the gym (personal fitness does substantial wonders to your self-esteem)
    -Video games (no variables are unconquerable and they're just damn fun)
    -Creative writing (basically put: lays your humanity down on the page)

    Find an event you can immerse yourself in OP, it'll make your stay in this world a lot more enjoyable. Another thing I'd suggest is having something dependent on you for its survival, a child, a pet, or even a plant can increase your self-worth.
  6. This is not a hard answer. It sounds like you just need more time to think. Go to your local junior college and just start completing general education courses. Those are easy classes that will help you make a better more educated career choice later.

  7. i would definitely not suggest doing this. you will starve. find something you can stand doing and make some paper. work to live dont live to work
  8. learn to meditate there is alot us humans do not know about ourselves because we are to distracted by the external world to discover the world inside which is just as endless, and if you need help on the journey to enlightenment you can take lsd which many use as a tool to expand their brain...

    [ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5hW6Dm_m5t4]YouTube - Richard Alpert (Ram Dass) on LSD[/ame] - Ram Dass
  9. I often have the same thoughts running through my head once I lie down at night. But as someone stated earlier, life is what you make of it.

    If you really don't like the way things are set up, then do as someone else stated and go live amongst nature. Of course, you wouldn't do that because you'd be cold in the winter, you'd be filthy, buying bud would become a problem once your cell phone would be cut off, and you wouldn't be able to log into Grasscity anymore. ( unless your like member who ran off to Canada and visited his library from time to time to update his thread. +rep to anyone who can reserect that by the way. )

    You will find something one day out there just for you, that will open your eyes and mind, and help you realise that is why you are here on this earth. Happened for me once my daughter was born, anyhow.
  10. ^^^ I have already tried meditation, went nowhere. I actually do creative writing, working out, and play video games.

    taking LSD will do nothing for me, it will just temporarily alter my brain and trick me into thinking i am changed forever, Huzzah the truth is revealed i can leave a happy life now! give me a fucking break

    this is all bullshit. just live to truck through the bullshit. whatever
  11. I know it's a cliche, but life is what you make of it.

    You have to work. There's no getting around that. That's not what society has "come to", it's always been that way because you need to eat. Once you become an adult, no one is going to feed you, literally and figuratively.

    The key is to work to live, not live to work. Work hard because you have to, and in your spare time you have the freedom to play hard.
  12. Regardless of which career or job path you end up choosing, having some form of education is going to be better than none. I totally understand not wanting to accept a repetitive lifestyle of doing a lot of bullshit you really don't want to be doing... but it's a part of life. If you want to eat, you have to work. The sooner you accept it the easier it will be. Who knows, 10 years down the road you may be embracing the very thing you're hating right now.

    I haven't met too many people living happily, or even comfortably, that chose to say "fuck the system".

    I don't blame you at all for not wanting to be a cook. I'd rather be doing back breaking manual labor than cooking... just not my thing. Best advice I could give, is try to find a career doing something you're really passionate about. It's cliche, but the only way to get the best of both worlds...

    I chose a career based on how much I would potentially earn. I want to kick myself in the ass every morning that I have to wake up and face a 8 - 12 hour day, on top of an hour commute to and from work.
  13. Since I've been a member here, I've seen numerous threads exactly like this, including one that I made. It's led me to the conclusion that most stoners would rather live in the woods and be free than live like a robot. You have the same ideas as me, man. But sadly, you need money to do anything, even if that is living in the wilderness lol. Fuck society.
  14. I sometimes feel the same way. I'm about to embark down a higher education path that will pretty much guarantee I become a 9-5 wage slave. It's something I don't want to happen, but acknowledge that it's the likelihood. I want to work for a charity or something (in a paid position) because then I'd feel like I was doing something.

    Whatever though. I want to earn enough money to travel and see the world and then settle down. I think I'd be happiest with a small house, a loving family, fertile land that I can feed myself and my family from and of course plenty of sweet sweet Mary Jane.

  15. It's called teen angst. I'm not making fun, it's a real thing that many of us go through.
  16. That might be the case for some, but I'm no teen :D There's some people out there that just don't want to conform (me!) :smoking:

  17. You don't need to conform to anything, but one still needs to support themselves.

    How would living in the woods "be free"? Getting up and spending all day / every day hunting and/or farming for food is about as robotic as life can be.
  18. You cant just try meditation to see what it is.

    and lsd doesn't trick you, it shows you.

    Divine introspection, at the cellular level.
  19. Well, I'm not really saying that I'm going to do it lol but I don't like society in general. So living away from it would be pretty ideal. Also if you are hunting and all that, it's for yourself, so I don't think it would be "robotic" per say...

    We can look at it both ways, really.
  20. i'm studying "the culinary arts" and i think it's pretty cool, i get to create something, make memories, the plate is my canvas, i am the deliverer of delacacies! it beats being in an office all day, and it's stoner friendly, but different strokes for different folks i guess.

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