Eh, I'm really irritated right now, so I have to get a few things out here. I moved out here nearly two years ago with my mom and she brought in one of her friends named Tom. He swore that he would be gone in three weeks. Two years and ten thousand problems later, he is still here. I wouldn't mind as much, but he is really trying my fucking patience, and no one wants to do anything about it, save myself. Whenever I have a cigarette, he comes downstairs and bitches. Normally it's just the 'Stop smoking.' ordeal, but recently it's gotten worse. Whenever he decides to be a prick, I kindly as my mother (owner of the house) to kick him out. She gives me: "Well, I hear you, I hear you." But in the last two years, my plea was not truly heard, and is usually muted by Tom coming downstairs and telling me to fuck off. About ten minutes ago, he came down here and went: "All this bitching to your mother about me.. that is no more, GOT IT?" That one got to me, as if he has the right to order anybody around. This fuck hasn't paid a dime of rent since he moved in, and he eats all of our food. I'm trying to be mature in this situation, more mature than he has been, but it's getting tricky. I'm pretty sure he's using a fear tactic with my mother, he threatens her often. I've told him to never threaten my mother or I again. But if he does, it's easy to get him out of the house. I don't know where I was going with this, my mind is scrambled right now. My mother is too empathetic, she will always let him back in.. If she wasn't, I would have changed the locks already. I can't move out for another year or so (logically, anyway), So I have to handle this some other way. I'm sure there is someone who has had a freeloader come in and make themselves at home. I don't expect any reccomendations in reference with what to do, I already have a small idea, but I just had to get that out of my system.
Well, I would tell the fucker to kick it, and leave. Explain to him how you live here and your mom does pay the rent and she does put the food in the fridge so quit ragging on me because you have no space to talk. Just knock the guy into his place.
wow, tough situation my friend. I would be planning my way out of that situation, but then, I am a drifter of sorts. I understand and respect your perspective. I feel for your mother too, if he is mentally abusive as you hit on. stay strong, don't let his lables and controlling nature get to you.
ive always had freeloaders in my house my siblings are all in their later 20's, early 30's, a they all have lived here with their children many times for over a year. my sister brenda has 3 children and stayed here for 3 years, shes 36, her children are 17, 14, and 11, and this totals to 9 people in my house.
I hate freeloading no matter what it is. Pay your way! Its damn unfair and i see why your getting angry.... cheating you out of money!
I donyt want to soud likea snitch, but legally you can have his ass thrown out if he tries to hit you ro yuor mom, and threatening you? His ass is grass. Either that or Id suggest you moving out, if you can, that way you dont have to deal wiht this shit. Talk to your mom about it, and tell her waht you have told us.
I've talked to her about him. She kicked him out once, and then let him back in a few weeks later. I cannot (logically) move out for another year or so. My sister and I are throwing whatever money we can get into a savings account before we leave, so we have some decent cash to fall back on. If we moved out right now, we would end up right back where we are. I'll deal with this. I swear, though, if he threatens my mother or I again, there will be a physical intervention.
just let him know that hes a bitch. foreal man as mindless said with a person of this nature the only way your gonna make him realize is if you make it clear to him your not putting up with this shit anymore. Tell him hes a freeloading bitch and he needs to GTFO your mom has better shit to spend her money on. just make it clear hes not welcome there anymore,give him bad vibes and maybe hell leave. situations of this nature require long, hurtful rants to the other persons face. let him know what a no good freeloader he is. use hurtful and shaming words. emotions may be the winner here. u dont wann deal with the po's if physicality gets too hardcore
If I were in this type of situation, I would probably just get into a physical fight with him. Only because this would make it clear to my mother that it is either me or him. I know my mom, and I know that she would pick me.
Careful about that though, don't hit him first if you can avoid it. You don't want to have cops to deal with too, and if you hit him first he'll come out looking a lot better than you do. In the eyes of the law and maybe even your mom, you could end up just looking like an angsty teenager who needs to get some help (obviously that's not true, but who would they believe in that situation?).
I'm one vote against getting physical, if not sincerely defending yourself. don't bring yourself to this level. this is not how to solve problems in life. it will only create more. I respectfully ask you to consider this carefully, peace man.
man i hear you on this one. i hate it when you have no say in things. and your mom obviously needs to just grow some balls and do something about it. no offense to her but thats really what it amounts to. i mean i dont know the situation between them, like how old either of them are and do they fuck? not that you want to picture them doing the nasty only in the next room, but that could be why she has the attatchment to him. you also say free loader like he doesnt pay rent and doesnt have a job. is this the idea also? maybe come up with something to tell your mom and just exagerate it to her and tell her how you feel and that if she doesnt do anything about it then you will toss his shit out when he leaves someplace and then when he comes back he wont be able to stay cuz you wont let him. its kind of like being the man of the house when no one else wants to be and technically if they arent married and you are an adult, then he has no say in what you do. but of course it truly is up to your mom about whether or not he comes back. but i tend to find that a letter is often more apt to get out your frustrations and to be heard the way you want to be heard without interuption. i learned that from dealing with my mom. but try that and even threaten him back a little saying if he says shit like that again that he had better really do it, and be prepared for you coming back at him with some shit. subtle threats go a long way. but still be careful about that. i suggest getting a little audio recorder so you can record his rants about what ever. just to protect yourself and you can even prove to your mom that he is that way if she is just in denial. and if she truly cares for your well being then she will see this and do something about it. good luck
No rent. No job. No romantic attachment whatsoever. Just a friend. No sex, they don't even sleep on the same floor. Considered that, as well. I would do it, but she would let him back in. I know this for goddamn sure. I wanted to video record him whenever he came down here (I live in the basement). I would need to properly position the camera on video mode to record in the proper direction, so everybody saw his face. All I would need to do (whenever anybody comes down here) is hit the shutter and listen to his shit. If it was my mom that came down here, i could just delete the video. If it was him, I have it. If he became physically abusive, all I would have to do is show the video to a judge and he is gone (legally). If he was mentally abusive (which is usually the case), I could show the video to a judge and he is still gone.
well as an adult you haev the right to have a restraining order against him. and even though he lives there doesnt mean shit. they can force him to move out. when you get that video then all you need to do is take a ride to a police station and say you hae proof of harassment and want to have a restraining order filed and then it will cost you some cash to have that but in your case i would imagine its worth it.
I'll post it on GC, I will! Atanyrate, I just set up the camera (facing the stairs), so when I hear anyone coming down I can hit the shutter and begin recording video.
is the freedloader sponging where there's excess, or where there's scarcity? one needs fixing, the other is just there to teach compassion, tollerence, patience, acceptance, etc.
Exactly, man thats fucked up and I for sure would not stand for it, but thats the kind of person I am. I mean if he is disrespecting me that's a huge issue, but if hes disrespecting my mom that's a whole other world and he would get fucked up by me pshycally and he would for sure regret it. I know that's not the right thing to to but I'm just telling you what I would do.
Thats why when I get my own place I will have a shotgun. And a giant laser. But seriously, Durchii, I widh you good luck, I hope this pissant gets whts coming to him!