Read this first then answer the poll. Alright I started dating this girl about four months ago. Things went well, we were really hitting it off. Then after a while, I started to look at other women, you know? I'd think about other girls instead of my girlfriend and I felt awful about it. However, when I hung out with my girlfriend I really enjoyed her company. Then I started chilling with this other girl (strictly friends though, never did anything inappropriate no flirting or anything) and I realized that I couldn't keep this relationship with my girlfriend as it wasn't fair because I was becoming interested in other women; however, I didn't know what I wanted. I knew that I was straying from my girlfriend though. So I dumped my girlfriend because I didn't want to cheat on her as that would be really bad. I mean, I enjoyed hanging out with her, but what does it say when I think about other women all the time (besides that I'm a pig, I really wish it hadn't happened like this). Worst of all, when my girlfriend and I were doing things, I told her I loved her, because I got caught up in the moment. Needless to say I feel like a worthless sack of shit and it kills me that she's heartbroken. I don't feel bad for myself, I feel bad for her. Now I'm deciding whether I'll ask her forgiveness or not and have her take me back, but I don't want to enter into the same situation I was in before; I don't want to have to dump her again because I'm interested in other women. Plus, I'm going to college as it's my senior year of highschool and she's a sophomore, so a breakup may be inevitable. It's been two days and we talked and I said I was gonna take a week and chill and think about what I should do as I didn't want to break her heart yet again. So I have some time to decide, and I feel awful for hurting her. I don't even want any other women right now, I'd like to ask her to take me back just so she won't hurt anymore but then I might enter into that same situation again. I need some advice- what should I do?
If your looking at other woman and are afraid to cheat on her just tell her it, the worst thing you could do to her is cheat on her. If your intrested in other girls you should probably break up with her, seems like you want her as a friend more than anything from what youve said, but that might not happen, goodluck
If you feel that you're at risk cheating on her, the best thing you could do would be to end it, and tell her why. I'm not sure about you, but I've been cheated on, and it's one of the worst feelings in the world, man. Plus, like Baker said, if you're looking at other women, then you're not as commited to the relationship as you should be. I'm really sorry that this happened, man, but it's life. Whatever you do, don't break her heart if she doesn't deserve it, and if you have no options (telling her would break her heart, cheating would too, etc), then let her down as best as you possibly could. The human heart (not the physical "I PUMP YOUR BLOOD" one) is a very fragile thing, and it is not to be taken for granted or mistreated. Good luck, man.
What I think: You feel bad because she feels bad so ask for forgiveness...just remember that we all feel bad at some point (many points); it's part of life. I wouldn't ask her to take you back, though. You don't have to be with the same person forever. Asking her to take you back to make her feel better isn't fair to her and it's not fair to you either. If you want to be straight with her, ask for forgiveness...but please, do what's best for you in the end. If you want to be free, be free.
It's better to break her heart now, then to cheat or lead her on. You did the right thing in my opinion. It's a good thing that you were able to recognize what you were doing before something happened, rep+ for having a kind heart man.
LOL. Man, i look at other women daily. I dont have a desire to cheat and ive never cheated on my g/f, but i look at other girls sometimes. I even tell her if there is a hot girl. There are what, 7 billion people in the world? Im going to think there are attractive girls other than my g/f. But if you feel like you might cheat, then i guess you did the right thing.
Yes, you should have broken up with her because it was the legal thing to do... be glad you're not being charged with statutory rape...
make sure she knows your reasoning behind. if it were my guess, women are more hurt over breakups because they think that there was some problem with them. im sure it would help her to get over things if you simply explaned the way you felt. maybe shes even doing the same thing.
Thanks peacefrog, and everyone else that commented. I know now that it's over for good and it would be best for both of us to move on. Also, I never had sex with her, so I can't get charged with statutory. Pathetic, yes, but I didn't feel I had the right to take her virginity because I had my doubts about the relationship for a while.
That is really cool of you, not pathetic. I know a lot of guys that wouldn't think twice about that. I bet if/when you find the chick that is right for you you'll treat her like a queen. Hope you find her soon.
Simple advice my friend. Honesty is the best policy in a relationship. If you felt the need to look at other girls, or even cheat, just tell her calmly and in a secure manner.
akw MAN...I THOUHGHT I JUST FELT LIKE this..... i feel ya man i broked up with with 4 ex's just cuz i looked at other girls and stuff..... sometimes you fee like (sounds fucked up) you want her to brake up with you..... i know i did when i was with those ex's IT'S HARD man but what can ou do... i have a new GF and she serious like she already want's to GET MARRIED, i love her but i still get that feeling with other girls too, but i dont wanna brake up with her
who brought this back? i'm sure his woman problem has long since passed. and no i didn't bring it back.
like others said you should just tell her what you put in your post... to me getting cheated on is one of the worst feelings... either they just dont have the balls to break up with you, or wanted more than one relationship... (my experience not all situations) i would have no problem if my girlfriend told me they wanted to see other people or whatever... im not going to get pissed at someone for how they feel... im just not like that... but one of my worst pet peeves is when people go around my back...