so I was smoking with my dealer in these woods by his house. He just picked up some really dank bubba kush, so after about 3 bowls out of his bong, we're completely ripped. This time of year is the deer mating season, so in PA, there's a bunch of honry hormonal bucks running around. after we finish packing up our third bowl, I see an 8 point buck about 10 feet in front of us. I hear the deer snort and kick the ground. He looks really pissed off, As he starts charging me, I pulled a small knife that I usually carry. The deer stops mid charge, stands on it's hind legs and says "Be cool dawg, I ain't tryna get cut!" I said to the deer "I cool, if you cool" The deer than starts complaining about his day, and how his doe left him for another buck, So I say to him, "It's all cool, You want the green hit this bowl of bubba kush?" The deer says ya, and puts his mouth to the bong, I hold the lighter and my dealer works the bowl since the deer doesn't have thumbs. The deer clears that bong like a champ, thanks us and walks away. My dealer asks "Did that really just happen?" and I reply "I doubt it, I think we're just really high." here's the mind-fuck. When looked at the bong, a corner of the bowl was burned. My dealer just finished packing it before all that happened. WHO THE FUCK HIT THAT BONG?
Fuck deer, im in PA too. We'll be on a blunt ride and one will jump out in front of the car and run away just to make me stop, then they'll come over and hit the blunt like Snoop Dogg in Half-Baked.
try dealing with a coyote, now that's a trip. they think they can light the bowl and they just drop it over and over until they're like "it's a weird fucking bowl man i can't grab, can you get me?" i never have the heart to tell him it's cause he's a fucking coyote, that dumb motherfucker.
Try heading home after smoking 6 blunts of nugs and out of nowehere you hit 230 lb doe going 65 in your 91 ford tempo....
try heading home after smoking 6 blunts of nugs and out of nowhere you get hit by a 4000 pound ford tempo being driven by a 230 lb doe going 65.
Man the deer here in MO are exactly the same, maybe even worse! I swear I can't blunt cruise with out getting stopped by those fuckers! I swear just yesterday there was at least 20 heads on these two blunts going around and only 3 of those heads were human.
do not ever fuck with a deer they kill the most people in america through car wrecks and attacks. All in all don't fuck with a deer in rut lol
yo dawg one time me and this bear were hitting the bong, this dood had some sick stories man he was from the sixties, he told me he had jusst got out of hibernation and his ass was still clogged with grass so i was like cool story man then he said how weed nowadays is way better den de old days then my dad came and shot him and he died so we sold him to some rednecks who said tehyd make bear pepperettes out of him and that we could buy them but we were like naw man thats cool, but they offered us some soapbar cut with bear shit but we turned it down so the guy pulled out a pitchfork and they started ion about some redneck angry mob shit, so me and my dad ran to the jeep, quickly sparked a cone, then started up the jeep we drove home and when we got there the pizza guy was there and he gave us the wrong toppings so we told him to get us a new pizza so he said fuck you and threw the pizza on the ground and jacked the money from my dads hand, turns out he wasnt a real pizza guy and the pizza was plastic! so we went to the pizza shop and they was like tf u didnt order any pizza? and we said, oh yeah we didnt, so we found the guy who ripped us off, turns out hes in the mafia and h threatens to kill our hole family if we dont fuck off, and to show us he meant business he curb stomped my dad now hes missing half of his teeth, we quickly got out of there, so i got home, rubbed one out quickly, took my dad to the hospital, turns out hes got mouth cancer, so im like what in the sweet flying mother of fuck, go to the bathroom, rub one out then get some money off my homie carlos he says i gotta pay him back tommorow but w/e only 20 grand ill just skip town as for my dad hes probably fucked,but fuck it LONG STORY SHORT: WE ENDED UP CATCHING THE GUY WHO WE FOUND RAPING THE RACOON IN THE TRAILER PARK AND TOOK HIM TO THE COPS
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! I literally laughed myself to tears from reading this! thanks man, I'm pretty sure we really did see that deer because it was pretty tense for a few seconds, I know that deer can be really dangerous. We still have no idea who hit the bong
[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pi5q-q3D0yI]YouTube - The Weed Fairy Tale - The Tale of the Lighter Gnome[/ame]