How to tell her I want/we have to fcck??

Discussion in 'Sex, Love & Relationships' started by Mr. Squishy, Aug 22, 2010.

  1. Holy fuck its so annoying I've been on and off with this chick. Ive been a close friend/distant friend/weed friend(dnt smoke anymore) and her considerable fcck buddy but IT NEVER happened. The most I've gotton out of years of knowing this girl was a shotgun of weed smoke in my room.. And that was like 2summers ago.

    She has a boyfriend who kinda an asshole anyway so that doesn't matter.

    thing is she's going away for college for who knows how long. I have all these conversation ideas but they seem pretty retarded so that doesn't do too much for me (its ganna be so long ill miss you [translate - I'm not ganna see you in a while so lets fuck])

    What am I to do?? Ive known her four yeaars
     
  2. This is what you gotta do. Ask her to hangout at your place. When she gets there, light up a blunt and she'll smoke. Then, whip out your dick and tell her to get to work. Now, relax and enjoy your blunt while your getting head.
     
  3. ^ Try this


    When it doesn't work, come back and post her reaction.
     
  4. Or, you could probably just accept the fact that she has a boyfriend and give up until she is single. :confused_2:
     
  5. Invite her over for a smoke and a movie or something like that. And during the entire movie do not make a move. You must wait for her to make the move first, so its like she is giving consent to say that yea you can fuck her and she wont tell her bf. Then when right when the movie is done and your hella high, go to the bathroom and cut a hole in a box. Get a stiffy quick and put it in the box, then make her open it.

    Either she leaves and you dont get laid (which would happen if you never tried)

    Or

    You get your dick wet.....and better yet......you successfully pulled off the Dick in a Box strategy, which is a one of the greatest feats of determination a man can receive.
     
  6. Yeh what if the guy kicks the fuck out of you?

    JD has a point.
     

  7. Doesn't she always? ;):D
     

  8. If they are really in that good of a relationship, he wont get laid. If they are in a bad relationship, then he might. All of the fault will be on the girl mostly. Im sure that dude will still want to kick his ass, but with college starting soon its gonna be hard to find him, and what is he gonna do? show up to his house and knock on the door?

    Thats when you pull out a fucking shotgun or a samurai sword and chop that fucker in half.
     

  9. You make it sound like violence is the answer dude. That's not cool... If you honestly think that it's alright for someones partner to cheat on someone just because the word on the street says things are rough. Doesn't mean that its going to be a win win situation.


    The OP should really just wait and see if she is ever single then try and hook up with her. Yah cool you have feelings for a girl that's taken, it's not worth possibly getting your ass in trouble.
     
  10. We have to fuck.
     
  11. honestly i would try the dick in the box/pizza thing. I was thinking about stripping for her to lady gaga. swear by all means nessacary I WILL put it in there!! but she packed everything tonight and she said she's leaving on sunday or something.

    if I could just SOMEHOW gain access to her pants before she catches the train all will be accomplished..:devious: but as of now I see no hope in my efforts to put it in there :confused::confused:

    im so fucked guys now I have to wait till october till her semesters over!!!
     

  12. :confused:

    Dick in a pizza?

    On another note. I love to fcck. It fucking rocks to fcck.
     

  13. Well I dont want to say that violence is the answer.....but I think its important to consider the consequences if violence breaks out.

    By the OP calling her bf an "asshole" I get the feeling that this guy can beat the op's ass. He is probably one of those obnoxious assholes who usually end up resorting to violence to solve their problems.

    Now, when a fight breaks out, and one person is used to solving problems through violence, and the OP wants to talk it out, that dude is gonna kick his ass because he is prepared.

    The best way to control someone who is physically more powerful than you is to use a more lethal method against theirs. With a gun or a sword, the op would then have a physical advantage, this levels the playing field and gives the OP a chance to defend himself. Its a dog eat dog world out there, and only the fittest survive.

    As humans, we are programmed to fuck and reproduce. When shit goes sour because of relationships, it is best for our survival to be prepared for a physical confrontation, even if that means using lethal force to prevent the death of yourself. A situation will only escalate to the point where one person gives up. Whoever gives up first loses, therefore it is only natural that we be prepared to defend our lives to the fullest extent, because if the tables are turned and we are threatened with lethal force and are forced to give up, then were fucked.
     


  14. yea well I mean I wasn't try to talk shit about him or anything.. when I said that I ment kinda loser like. "Like wow what an asshole why would he say that"
    [Assume] Once he finds out - I wouldn't instigate it. I can mess him up but its not really like im looking for a fight. She said she wasn't enjoying the relationship so much either -so since we've been friends for so long I figured I'd do both of us a favor and be her sex partner on the side.

    She has a history of dating really crappy boyfriends. When we were younger it was all friend zone for me; helping her get through break ups and showing her a good time to keep her company when she was alone. That was about it. Never really had intentions of doing anything physical with her.

    But now I figure why not. At the last minute.. guess I'll have to visit her dorm with drinks/grass.. even better right?
     
  15. Liqweed - In all honesty there would be no violence if she didn't cheat on him in the first place, so why should Mr.Squishy be on the receiving end?


    But you honestly can't wait until she breaks up with the dude.
    If shit is so horribly bad then why is she dragging on the horrible relationship she supposedly is in? She sounds tricky to me, so I could only imagine how tied up in this ball of mess you could get yourself into. I mean if you're down for unnecessary drama then go and try and fuck her.

    On the other side, October is not that far away.
     
  16. you sound like you're well into the friend zone. I don't think she's into you & she has a boyfriend dude. but whatever, bring it up casually and play it off as a joke if things start to get awkward and she ain't feeling it.
     
  17. [​IMG]
     
  18. take out your dick and look her in the eyes....
    and say "You feel me?
     
  19. First off, shes got a man already. Back off. Think about it man. if u had a gf and some dude fucked her how would u feel? you'd prob beat the fuck outta him. If your not big, well you'd get a bat, a tazer, a fucking rhino. You'd find somethin muthafucka.

    Second, SHE DOESNT WANT YOUR DICK DUDE. After a month if u guys arent at least kissing then you are friends. Sorry but ole willy boy aint gettin shit on christmas mornin.
     
  20. your probably going to receive a nice hug
    its what friends do.
     

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