1) Watch many different films from obscure directors/countries/genres. Spend a year doing this. 2) Write down the things I thought were kewl. 3) Copy all of them exactly and combine these into one script which I will write. 4) Pad out script with words "fuck" and "******". 5) CAST UMA THURMAN ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS 6) Make film. Remember to close up on woman's feet to please my fetishism. 7) Profit; gain adoration of millions of budding film students/pop culture scenesters. 8) Repeat. Copy ideas from previous film. Can we all agree that this guy sucks?