I need help blades. I was dating this girl for a year and 8 months, and she left me because I wasn't treating her right which I totally respect. Now I'm in that "you realize what you had once its gone " deals and we've been broken up for 4 months, almost 5.so I'm pretty much stuck in.the friendzone now. My father recently passed away 2 weeks ago and she's helping me a lot with this, and I have to have her back. She is perfect, and I don't say this just cause I love her. She saved me from killing myself and showed me how to be happy again. I know there's other women out there, but why search for perfect when you've already found it? I really need help. How do I get out of this fucked up friend-zone shit ?
Take it from me dude, you DON'T "need" to get her back, you just think you do. And honestly the only reason why you want her back is most likely because you realize you can't have her anymore. That's human nature. That and you said that she helped you not kill yourself, so you're probably hanging onto her for that too. You guys broke up for a reason. You even said it was your fault, so take it like a man and move on. Sorry about your dad, but seriously, move on.
You are friends now, tell her that you're sorry, and that you know that you fucked up with her. If she stops being your friend move on. If she says yeah well good.
sorry about your pops, but ya do gotta, keep it moving. Once couples break up, it was never meant to be imo.
I would normally say this, but I won't because there is no good reason you shouldn't give it another chance. If she cares about you that much to help even after you broke up, then go for it man! As for getting out of the friendzone, all it takes is a simple talk. Sit her down and be confident, show her you've changed. Good luck man!
Just ask her out. But have you considered that she genuinely doesn't want to be with you anymore? If she feels that way you need to respect that. She's a person. Her opinion matters.
Lol that people talk about the friendzone like its a place. If you do something to attract a girl, it doesn't matter how long you've known them. People only bitch about the friendzone because they are beta and don't know how to talk to females
Of course, you're an alpha. You get pussy all day every day, throw it away unless they're a really good lay.
Chasing an ex leaves you feeling so shitty. May as well be straight up and get the uncomfortable friend phase over with. Though with you're going through maybe it's worth letting it ride out until you think you're ready. She sounds like a big support and you'd be risking losing that. Sorry to hear about your dad, and I don't mean to sound sketchy, but you should be able to handle that on your own. I mean it would be better overall I think because it would make you stronger to do it yourself than to rely on someone, but I know that can feel pretty impossible. But still, dealing with chasing an ex sounds like too much mental bullshit to deal with on top of losing a parent =\ If possible I'd suggest looking to your family for support rather than your ex. And they probably need you just as much as you need someone. And the friendzone is kind of bullshit unless you've been friends so long you grew up together from a very young age. There's even been studies on the subject that support that. You can change somebody's intimate view of you whenever with the right game. it just takes a little longer than it would with a new person. But there's no permanent switch in someones brain that shuts them off towards you (again, unless you grew up together from a very young age, in which case your brain conditions itself to not find them attractive like it does for family members. And sometimes your brain doesn't do that and you can still have intimacy) I say that, but I still know that friendzone feel bro.
its not like i was going out to personally offend you by explaining my viewpoint.. seems you took it that way. i didnt even say i was an alpha, I certainly know how to talk to girls (and anyone really) and guide a conversation. My dad was a salesman and I grew up learning NLP, Neuro-Linguistic Programming, without even knowing it. This is basically the art of conversation and body language that allows you to read into certain meta-dialogue that happens each and everyday. I'm not saying EVERY girl is interested in me sexually (which I guess could be called a friendzone) I just don't complain and chase every girl that doesn't want to give me the time of day. lol, you got the wrong idea of me from your impression of my post, I'm not a woman-chaser and I've been with the same girl for 2 years.. I just know how to talk to people.
I suppose I was just offended because I've experienced it before and I've experienced the other side as well and I just don't like people being judged when it's really not that hard to drop to either level.
You have to understand, as much as you hurt her by mistreating her is much how you feel now. Except you did it knowing it would hurt her, you can try to have an honest conversation with her about this and how you feel. However, I am not sure how much good it would do since she seems determined to not be hurt by you again. And really how can you blame her? You hurt her once so why is twice such a stretch, if it will work she either has to trust you fully or you have to have shown through action you won't do it again.