How I Live My Life (Long)

Felt like sharing who I Am and how I live my life..I love the way I live it and who I am and wouldn't change it for anything in the universe..if perhaps some people find something for themselves in it thats an added bonus.

Who I Am Now

A child of this world, trying to live my life from the moment forward. I attempt to make my reality and my present not a product of my past or who I have been in the past, but a product of the future that I am living into. I am a cosmotheist, I have felt and found the Buddha head and have seen and felt enough to know, for me, that questions and thinking are futile and limited, and that in the collective unconsciousness that stems from the nothing and that engulfs and is everything and anything that can be reached through active spiritual practice on a moment to moment basis lies all the truth and reality I ever seem to need.

I am in love, infinite, and living my life into a future of uncontained, explosive expression as a life in this universe. Exploring for myself as the first consciousness ever did, I live with a passion for the very existence of life that makes every moment of my life my best moment. I need but the sky above me, the wind in my hair, and the night stars alone to feel at home anywhere in this universe at any given time - for the sky and wind are mine. Not mine alone, but mine just as much as any consciousness' in this universe.

I am not my name, my clothing, my shelter, or any of my actions of the past. I am an essentially nameless, label-less entity that is therefore free to be anything and anybody it wants to.

I Am that I Am, and thats who I Am

The question that remains unanswered, usually, is "does this internal state crossover and manifest itself as you want in reality"? Answer - Yes

 

Core Beliefs

- I Am that I Am, it is what it is, which is nothing, and therefore from me and from anything can stem everything

- There are only 3 rational truths that I recognize:

1) I will die
2) I like positivity, happiness, and creative expression
3) I am currently in the possibly 'for a one time and a one time only' position of being alive

From this, if need be, I can rationally deduce, for myself, that I want to live every damn awesome moment of my short, short life with positivity, happiness, and abundant creative expression, for one day, perhaps today, I will die.

- We are island universes, never to behold another's consciousness, ever. For all I know, I am all that is real as I am a perceiving consciousness, and that therefore nobody in this universe is inherently right or wrong, and that I will live as I please, attempting to take all those who volunteer along into my newfound world of infinite expression.

- Pain, fear and suffering are not real. They are constructs of the mind. The sensation of pain is simply that; the sensation. That it is painful and/or negative is my instinctive interpretation. What the sensation REALLY is is just the sensation, in its naked existence.

- Uncontained euphoric oneness and cosmic alignment are all that are real. Through spiritual practice, the godhead that is acheived has not the concept of suffering - its as though it has never existed, all it has is an immeasurably vast oneness, unceasing eternal love, and barenaked, raw possibility.

- In this godhead, inherent feelings of appropriateness of action are governed from the very core, and are therefore unshakable. The conscience automatically aligns with all that is good and true, for real and not in doctrine. Suicide, murder, harm of another consciousness are unmanifestable in this state. The only feelings one has towards other consciousnesses is of eternal connection, positivity, and a want to creative a further positive experience in the union of the other consciousness.

- The godhead must be achieved through our innate state though; through the mind. The mind is very heavily influenced by biological agents, dopamines, hormones, and the like. Supplementation of biological agents can put the mind in a much better position to achieve the godhead, if active spirituality is practiced while under the influence. Marijuana, testosterone, light alcohol, and psychedelics are my biological agents of choice to influence my ascension into this state, usually when I find sober meditation is difficult at the time. No 'feel good' substances, and no physically addictive substances; they are eventually counterproductive to the purpose.

- My body and mind are my physical vessels in this short, euphoric experience of life, and I work at keeping them healthy as possible through the lifetime.

 

I write poetry, and find it best expresses me most often, and so I will post some of my pieces of relevance

 

thats it ill start with, will post more later

 

Felt it inside me from as long as I could remember.

Indeed, so much unreal, senseless suffering and premature loss of life.

The rise of a new consciousness is at present.

 

Career wise im currently a student. A cosmotheist is someone who believes that divinity exists, is all that exists, and is everywhere and everything.

Not 6 months ago I used to sit in my campus apartment brooding suicide more than 15-20 times a day, did not attend any classes, had the most intense social phobia and generally hated people and everything. When my roomate threw parties I would hide in the room and pretend to be asleep. I failed out of that college.

Currently re-enrolled, waiting for college to start again, and brimming with nothing but positivity and productivity.

Have started singing phenomenally (I say so myself) and am looking for a classic/psychedelic rock band to start working with. Have picked up the electric guitar and am making whirlwhind progress, and intend on creating my own style of music with layered albums - spiritual rock.

Have turned overnight into a natural social butterfly, love being around people and people just love being around me. Become a natural, compulsive flirt and have ladies coming my way all the time where I never had any before and felt unworthy and all kinds of other hillarious crap.

For the coming year im taking up mma, music, school, starting an NGO movement called "Life in your veins revolution", about helping people become self-aware, working on setting up an ebiz, starting my first job, and am moving out on my own

Where I could not fathom being topless in front of my own family (was a bodybuilder and had a better than average body), I am carefree in how I dress, frequently visiting walmart and jewel osco when im out topless or with my shirt completely unbuttoned - just because i like it like that, and my physique is just about average now (much less muscular than it used to be).

I'm falling deeper and deeper in love with life and with who I am everyday.

Just got my first ink done yesterday too. Fire color infinity symbol on my left pec. Absolutely love it.