PMS Commandos Take all American women who are within five to 10 years of menopause - train us for a few weeks, outfit us with automatic weapons, grenades, gas masks, moisturizer with SPF15, Prozac, hormones, chocolate, and canned tuna - drop us (parachuted, preferably) across the landscape of Afghanistan, and let us do what comes naturally. Think about it. Our anger quotient alone, even when doing standard stuff like grocery shopping and paying bills, is formidable enough to make even armed men in turbans tremble. We've had our children, we would gladly suffer or die to protect them and their future. We'd like to get away from our husbands, if they haven't left already. And for those of us who are single, the prospect of finding a good man with whom to share life is about as likely as being struck by lightning. We have nothing to lose. We've survived the water diet, the protein diet, the carbohydrate diet, and the grapefruit diet in gyms and saunas across America and never lost a pound. We can easily survive months in the hostile terrain of Afghanistan with no food at all! We've spent years tracking down our husbands or lovers in bars, hardware stores, or sporting events...finding bin Laden in some cave will be no problem. Uniting all the warring tribes of Afghanistan in a new government? Oh, please ... we've planned the seating arrangements for in-laws and extended families at Thanksgiving dinners for years ... we understand tribal warfare. Between us, we've divorced enough husbands to know every trick there is for how they hide, launder, or cover up bank accounts and money sources. We know how to find that money and we know how to seize it ... with or without the government's help! Let us go and fight. The Taliban hates women. Imagine their terror as we crawl like ants with hot-flashes over their godforsaken terrain.
100% right on! How do we always track them down? And why do they always pick dive bars? With names like "the cave" or "the Elbeau Room"? Thats spelled right by the way, instead of elbow. I actually went to a bar once called the "green weenie". I had to draw the line with that one. Cut him lose, got a new one. At Lowes. I cant win. LOL!!!!
Stony, you kill me! Actually I got the same thing in my E-mail...I can relate to wanting to totally annihilate people sometimes (PMS). That's not a half bad idea and like Hiwatha, I could use some time away!!! LOL
Stony, you put chills down my spine and horrible images in my head with that post. Not all us husbands are like that, at least not anymore.
LOL ok, so there's been some kind of major "husband reform" that I was unaware of!! (j/k..I love men..for amusement only lol). In all seriousness, though, NEVER underestimate the power of a pissed off woman! Like you once pointed out, not too long ago, I might add, we're all craaazy!!
*LMFAO* I'll have to get back to ya on my reply. I am laughing to hard to think!! I can just imagine PMS women take over country. Head lines PMS TOOK OVER TALIBAN TODAY. WOMEN do rule the world!! The only thing good for the men of these women is, We will get a brake for two days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! while the women do it..
I knew no one would see this if I replied to it since it was a long time ago. I have to agree with you stony since the other day I saw this thing on tv the other day. I think it was Leno there was this guy on there talking about how if the taliban had women over there like we do here the attack would have never happened. he said could you imagine if a guy said to his wife "honey I am gonna go with a coulple of buddies and crash a plane into the trade center today I'll see ya later" and the wife says "oh no your not you are gonna cut the grass and you have a bunch of stuff to do today" it went kind of like this but he was talking with a funny acsent.