Help with depression?

Discussion in 'Philosophy' started by fishyfish, Sep 4, 2009.

  1. I feel like I've been depressed for so long and can never be happy, before I used to just smoke weed to help the stress but after smoking so much of it you start to lose your love for the stuff and feel worse.

    I have so many things on my mind that I cant even seem to focus on anything. Some days I don't even feel like getting out of bed but I still do because I don't want to ruin my life even more.

    I'm lonely all the time because I have no family around and can't seem to find a girlfriend. A lot of it is family problems, and personal health issues too.

    Depression pills won't seem to help and I'm tired of taking them. I just came on to vent and see if anyone can help me feel normal and loving life again. I feel better after talking about my problems. :wave:
  2. #2 olmeca, Sep 4, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 4, 2009
    hello fishyfish, welcome to the madness, you will feel really at home here. You seem in a quandary, health issues, depression, frustration.

    I think you need to tell us a bit more. You have given us so little to go on. The more logical answers to you problems would be, do you exercise? do you smoke too much? do you eat healthy?

    Tell us a bit more so we can relate a bit better.
  3. Hey bud, welcome (even though I'm still pretty new myself to Grass City). To give you some help we're going to need a bit more insight. What's triggered it all etc. I could probably help some what, as I know what it's like man. Hold in there.

  4. #4 fishyfish, Sep 4, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 4, 2009
    I'm glad to see that, I've always noticed that about Grasscity. I smoke 2 bong loads in the mourning before I go to school, it helps me wake up and be focused on getting ready and being on time. Then when I get home I'll get comfortable and head for the bong.

    The issue on my family is my mom is still on crack and my whole family doesn't even talk to her because of all the things she's done like stealing family rings, and even fighting my aunt when I was a kid in front of me when she was trying to help her. It was really hard growing up.

    I'm 19 and live on my own now in an apartment help paid for by my family trying to get me out of my moms. I've been feeling real lonely and get paranoid when I smoke a lot. I've never been a good looking kid and don't even want to think what my mom was doing when she was pregnant with me. I've always had trouble finding a girlfriend having only a couple that weren't even serious relationships, wishing that I can find someone to to care about.

    I'm bi-polar, and also have had a lot of skin cancer growing up, having to have surgery a lot leaving me with scars all over my body. I lost even more self-esteem and confidence after that.

    I know people all over the world have it a lot worse then I do and I'm thankful for everything I have, that's pretty much everything :rolleyes:
  5. The very fact that you seek help instead of carrying on like this is all that life is shows that you have a lot of determination.

    I'm old so I am going to say the boring things that perhaps others are not. You've grown up without guidance, you need to find it yourself.

    You need to replace those empty voids with spaces, spaces like you would enjoy. Your only 19 so off the top of my head would be join a gym, go kick boxing, go running and most of all go hiking and climb a mountain and experience the outdoors, its a big enjoyable world. Do some exercise that tires you out that you enjoy.

    This alone will help put your life in perspective and give you a great nights sleep. With a stronger body, comes a stronger mind with which you can make much better decisions on how to live you life. This will enable you to expand you life to other aspects that you enjoy and lead to a much fulfilling life.

    All of this doesn't come straight away, and you need to work at it, but the rewards will come. This is life the harder you work at something the greater the reward.

    I would also say that toking is great but its not a breakfast cereal, save it for when your relaxing at the end of the day. Its not a good thing to start your day with.
  6. Well, man. Life has certainly given you the shit end of the stick, but the fact that you recognize your emotions makes it easier to understand. Many people don't even acknowledge the way they feel and it sadly leads to darker roads. But the fact you know yourself enough to know you're feeling this way is a step in the right direction.

    Basically, I'd maybe rest off a bit (Not that I think it's doing you any harm) on the smoking. Change your diet a bit, get some real good fruits and vegetables in your diet and drink a lot of water, because if your body is happy your mind will begin to come around. Rest as much as you possibly can, and try and keep it a consistent sleep, if you're constantly being awoken your body will retaliate by being an asshole. Try some walking around the block (if it's a safe area) or jogging or running. Fresh air cleanses the lungs a bit and clears out your mind, not to mention it will release loads of endorphins into you and that will make you feel reeeeeeally good :p. Do some natural things that generally make you happy, to simple right?

    Now, with your more personal life. Forgive how cliche/cheesy/Dr. Phil this might sound but dude, you need to love yourself before anyone else can love you. You need to heed the above advice I've given you, suck in all the fresh air, get your endorphins flowing and eat a bit better. Once your energy is re-built, you will radiate a positivity and energies of all kinds will be drawn towards you. It may take work, man, actually, I promise it will take work but (and I've been EXACTLY where you are right now) it's worth it and you'll see the results in days! Life is an experience that we can't allow our flaws and mental restraints dampen. The journey we all take alone is one with many obstacles, and when you see those mother fuckers you better believe if you don't dive in head first and fight through it, they're going to flatten you. Sadly this happens too often, but Fish, man, you don't put out a weak vibe, and your experiences that you have mentioned solidify my belief that you're a strong soul. When all this is done, which shouldn't take long depending on your commitment, then you can delve a bit deeper.

    I can't say anymore, except know that I've been where you are, and you'll get past it. The world is a beautiful place and as long as you remember that. You'll be good. Contact me if I can help you any more, dude. I'm serious.

    Take care of yourself, brother!
  7. 1. quit smoking
    2. go to church

    only then will you know your true self.
  8. Quit smoking, maybe. Go to church, please refrain from doing so. While I have no problems with anyone having faith, I think people can believe whatever they want to believe, I'd hate to see your mind get clouded with Christian placebos. Focus on the natural comfort the Earth projects onto all of us before you rely on the false comfort Christianity so often projects. No offense bizzletwister, I respect your right to believe in any God you choose, but he needs to get better before he finds God. Too many people invest more energy into God than they do their own well-being and it's sad to see people going over the edge with all their faith in "God". I just want to make sure you understand I'm not attacking you bizzletwister, I have just been where he's been and God doesn't do anything for a condition like this.

  9. Hmm.. Truth will be unraveled in time! :D
  10. Religious dogma will drown you and engulf you in fear instead of love. It may seem like love... but believe me... it's fear.

    I wish I had the time to read all the posts but unfortunately I can't right now. I just really wanted to tell you to stick in there. I've been dealing with depression for almost as long as you have and it's not something that just goes. It's really hard to admit, but it's true. You have to get better one baby step at a time. And stop taking the happy pills, they're not worth it if they don't significantly work. Good vibes to you man, you could use 'em.
  11. be happy

    its as unreal as being sad is...

  12. your ignorance causes me sorrow, but i still see hope! I just really wanted to tell you to stick in there!! it's really hard to admit, but its true!
    You have to get better one baby step at a time. And stop taking the happy pills, they're not worth it if they don't significantly work. Good vibes to you man, you could use 'em. :D

    im so original!!

    but cereal-ly...
    truth will unravel itself it time... .... ... ... ... just wait... ... and then wait some more.
  13. I can understand a bit of depression fitting in with this description of your life.

    It sounds to me as if you might prefer a more familial environment, perhaps moving out was not such a good idea for you yet.

    It's ok to feel down if there's a reason. Loneliness is a killer, if left untreated.

    Volunteer at a local soup kitchen, get to know the homeless, They are lonely, too, often and many of them have stories to tell.

    Don't wallow in self-pity. Go serve the needy, and see if that helps. Maybe it will, maybe not, but if not that, try to do something for someone else, and see if that helps with the loneliness.

  14. i don't think this is a universal thing. Its not as simple as that. Right now, its up to him to decide if he wants to keep smoking - he does have skin cancer. Unless weed is getting in the way of something, don't worry about it.

    as far as going to church - it depends on your faith and your spirituality. At first, i'd go to church for my family even though i despised it. I can go now with a more open mind, but i still hold the position that organized religion is awful. If your looking for guidance, direction, or spirituality, look for it within yourself and not from a book or the words of others. Only you can find that.

    If i were you i'd start with a therapist. They help out so much more than people like to admit, and they can't prescribe drugs. After a few sessions, if you think something like an SSRI (anti-depressent), or a benzo for anxiety or something would help, then go that route. I too am bipolar. I've been on and off meds, and im still not sure which i like better. I think id rather be off em, but right now just for the beginning of the school year i'm on celexa for anxiety, and lamictal for bipolar (since celexa is an SSRI, it will trigger my bipolar if i dont take lamictal as well).

    I can't relate to your whole situation, but i know whats goin on in your head man. PM me if you want, i've been through all this bullshit when it comes to depression, anxiety, and bipolar. Its hard to believe it when you "have" it, but it really is all in your head.
  15. I didnt have the time to read through everyone's post, but hopefully this will help some.

    My personal advice for you is to smoke once a week (you really start to appreciate the plant again and get its full effects every time), exercise, eat healthy, get off the pills, and once you maintain this lifestyle for a month or two get back to me. I used to be in a similiar situation but with some hard work I am slowly coming out of that fog.

    And to bizzletwister, I dont see why you have to tell people to stop smoking to go to church. It is a god given plant and as long as it isnt abused (i'd say once a week) it can help any individual with their faith and health exponentially.
  16. My advice to you man, would be to just be positive. I know this sounds really, and I mean really hard right now, but push through. In the end, you'll be happy, trust me. As for your family problems, just love them man. I know this sounds hard, but love that you do have a family, even though they might not be the best or the nicest. Love and care for them. Love the world on how it is, not how it seems or looks.

    And I might add, try to meditate. Meditation really does the mind wonders. You could be the loneliest, depressed son of a bitch out there and still benefit from meditating. Try to hit up some Buddhist temples. They'll help you out man, if you have an open mind. They are the ones that know suffering. Have you ever seen those pictures of them on fire, just sitting there. That must take a hell lot of mind discipline. I respect those peeps.

    Keep your head up bro, time heals everything.:)


  17. thats exactly what it did for me
  18. Then please enlighten me as to why you stopped smoking? Just curious, not trying to be hard on you or anything
  19. Thank you everyone for taking the time to reply, and I read every post taking down mental notes that I'll have to remember in the future.

    Today I skipped my mourning session after listening to a couple of you to try it and when I got home I started lifting my weights again. I also got on my old short board and took my pit bull terrier around the neighborhood as she pulled me. I'm still gonna smoke but I'll cut back, saving money and lessening my tolerance.

    I also called my uncle who's always been like a father to me because hes been teaching me guitar since I was a kid, told him that I'll have to stop by a couple times a week to play some tunes and watch the game.

    I don't know If I could afford a therapist right now, or a gym membership being a bit pricey for me but I'll have to look into them more.

    I could never really talk about this with most of my friends in real life so It feels good to hear everyones different opinions and find the best one for me right now.

  20. #20 bizzletwister10, Sep 5, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: Sep 5, 2009

    because i found faith.

    you asked for it.... :D

    i smoked every day, stayed high about all day every day for what seems like a few years. these were my first 3 years of high school. i have always had good grades and been successful in most everything i did, including sports and art. i dont like to brag, but i have always known i was gifted, but have never really applied myself. so my summer going into my senior year, i dug very deep within. it all started with ancient history, then quantum physics, then personal theories-then religion brought itself to me. my experiences are documented on this site. i have became very extreme in everything i do; all that i practice (skateboarding, guitar, wrestling, graffiti) and all of my thoughts. once i learned angels are real my life turned right side up. before i decided to base my life on moral i was very dishonest and used a lot of drugs. i feel a lot more comfortable with my life now, and it is honestly difficult for me to even tell a very small lie. every day i try to improve myself. i see marijuana as a tool for a particular stage of enlightenment. some people will discover a divine path. i think it is part of a great plan only some will discover. if you feel the need to smoke weed, roll a bog ole dank fatty! but as for me, i believe that stage is over. i was searching of the light, and now it is found.

    as for my reasons for believing in church, they are VERY personal. the world will open their eyes and truth will be revealed in time. clues will be revealed, and many will deny them. finding faith is a very personal journey, and i dont expect anyone who hasnt found it to be able to relate. i once saw religion as support groups and the bible as figurative; oh buddy, was i wrong. then the pieces fell into place. these people of the past were not as ignorant as many think- no, their eyes were open. they knew the plan. they are sharing it with us today. every day it is materializing, silently, in the souls of certain beings. the pyramids, the planets, the sun, beings with super-human abilities, the face on mars; dont worry, the pieces will fall into place. many religions are real and literal. buy it or not. i have accepted predestination as well. i have a lot of theories on these subjects that would take days for me to elaborate on, but feel free too ask any questions you may have. im always open ears.

    since all this has occurred i have developed a "silly" sense of humor and a passion for life and love. i get high off of pleasure in activities and the people i spend time with. i no longer need any substances, and doubt i ever will. never would have guessed it before it happened. and i love how god cant be proven, that is what makes his plan so great. dont hate. appreciate. im not trying to convince anyone of anything, the decision is already made.

    i hope one day you look back at this post and it sends tingles down your spine!

    i hope that sounded crazy.
    have a nice life :D
    theres a song to enjoy that has nothing to do with anything.

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