First and foremost, I don't know where to put this... and BEAR WITH ME this is URGENT! I NEED HELP! And please, at LEAST be 18 (so you know what the fuck you're talking about) and level headed enough to examine both parties and give good advice. My girl is pregnant. Okay cool no problem there, I manned up and am first on a waiting list for a job. BUT!!! She doesn't know if it's mine or not, it could be her exe's kid. THAT PART KILLS ME! (I haven't cried so much or so hard my life as I have the past couple days) More info on that, she still hangs with her ex and talks to him because their supposed to stay friends. It bothers me knowing that she had sex with him before we got together but that was beyond my control and I can't let that bother how I feel about her. She's admitted she still loves her ex. (More than me, but not IN LOVE) But that's because he's helped her through a lot of personal problems. Okay cool, still doesn't bother me much. Did she cheat on me? I hope not. I believe she didn't but there's still that doubt because SHE HAS DOUBT! (Why would you doubt who's kid it was if you weren't cheating?) We're getting a paternity test and shit ASAP but I'm stressed. I smoke pot WAY less frequently, but I NEED to smoke right now to cope. (I have no outlet) My mother, who didn't wanna be a Grandma, even says I should because it'll make me think more clearly. (She's also against weed and won't allow smoking it in her house.) My girl said if it's mine (the kid) she don't even want me smoking even the most miniscule amount of weed. (I don't want that around my pride n joy anyway but there are ways around shit, always. ALWAYS!) Should I just give up smoking for good? I don't WANT to. I've definitely considered what is best for the kid but there are other means of partaking and my girl will not let me take upon those means. She believes if you smoke pot consistantly on a "I'll only smoke one time, one day out of 6 months" that you're still considered a pot head. She also believes it runs my life but that isn't the case. Ever since I met her my heart has made HER my TOP PRIORITY! She's given me the ultimatum, stay with her and be clean or smoke pot and lose her. To me it makes no sense considering I TRY (I still do from time to time, it's called jealousy) to not let her ex and her's friendship bother me. I almost want to say "well if you stay friends with him, I'm still going to smoke pot" but I don't want that to piss her off and me losing even the chance to find out if it is mine or not. Help me please? I feel like I'm suffocating, I feel like a part of me is dying on the inside. Any suggestions will be greatly appreciated.