Hello! I'm smoking weed once a week more or less. Sometimes I don't smoke for a month or two it's not a problem for me. But I have this other pattern/routine going on for a long time, would love to hear your opinion: When I don't smoke and live my daily life I can't deal with my responsibilities. I'm always worried about the shit I must do, studies, deadlines, jobs i need to do in order to move forward and simply don't do it. If after 3 hours of preparation in youtube and facebook i'm finally doing it, i can't control my attention it runs like crazy, i got frustrated very easily I jump from one thing to another. I just feel like i'm not controlling anything in my life and just flowing on the surface, not going any deeper. I know that I need to change something in me, move my ass, but i'm simply ending just wandering around. I feel like I'm living in this shell, i'm always stressed about that. I really suck at learning new things. The conentration/focus issue is eating me and i'm on this rollecoster of emotions. Everything is great and it grudually goes lower until i'm sucked out. Also when i'm being with people, it's all good I have plenty of friends but I often feel disconnected and it's rare that I connect with them in a level i want, always other shit runs trough my mind. I should really pay attention to what they are saying and it just doesn't strike me to the core. If i have a situation where I need to pick one thing out of few, i'm lost i don't know which I prefer. Someone would say it's normal struggle for average person. But here is the thing. If i only smoke a little weed. I know where i'm in my life. It makes me sharp as I suppose to be. I can weight my thoughts, I can plan things, I can tell for myself what I actually like and what I don't like. I can tell my self to stop automatic mechanism. I can do one thing at the time and fully immerse into it. I start knowing how to make my life better, suddenly i realize that I was an asshole for one or another person and even didn't knew it. I can immediately do my work without any preparation. I can connect with people and I can tell things that I really mean without any problem. It feels like the barrier is gone and i'm fresh. I want to be like this in my sober state! It's great, I just repeat to myself don't forget this mindstate YOU MUST REMEMBER IT! but after day or two, I get back at the same pattern. I'll try to do all the shit i suppose to do and go to sleep telling myself that next day ill do it. I have this theory that smoking weed in the first place is the cause of this problem. That after the weed wears off, I lack somekind of chemicals, brain stops making them naturally and it makes me sketchy. I want to be real me. but I hate the fact and feel bad that it's a drug that is kicking my ass and is helping me to do things in life, not me. What do you people think about all this mumble? I What you people think, should I stop smoking? Do you think that smoking can affect sober state of mind?