My (21 M) close friend (22 M) of 9 years has horrible etiquette when we’re smoking and idk how to address it. He’s a big guy and claims he has a “high tolerance”, but only smokes 1-2x/month and only when I’m providing. He’ll say things like “I don’t feel high right now. We should totally smoke more!” when my girlfriend and I aren’t really feeling up to “going crazy” (his words). I’ve been patient with him bc he‘s one of my best friends and he’s only been smoking with us occasionally for about a year, but his etiquette needs serious work. I’m a passive and chill guy and he’s real sensitive. We’re both anxious people so I try to give him signals to change his behavior instead of calling him out. After several torched bowls, I tried to show him how to corner it and instead of taking my advice he continued to do it his way so that he’d get a “bigger hit”. He also takes huge rips of my bong to the point where it’ll be half-cleared before it’s passed. One time I gave him 2 of my homemade edibles and he told me they “weren’t strong enough”. When I ask, he’ll throw some $ my way or provide snacks, but I usually have to ask. When we’re not smoking together, he’s a good friend and he does nice things for my girlfriend and I. (Like buying us kitchen appliances when we moved in, making bomb af drinks for our parties, lending us movies and video games, etc) He’s definitely got pride issues that he’s countering by acting entitled and I know he’s been in a depressive slump for 4 years so I think I’m his only outlet for a good time. I just wish he would chill out bc he’s fun when he’s not being a dick. What should I do?
Just let him know man. I dont mind smoking a couple bongs with you when you wanna smoke but if you wanna go crazy I need to get a few bucks, preferably without asking you every time because that makes me uncomfortable. Then you give um the whole I value you as a friend speech.
You said you only smoke together a couple of times a month. You say he's a good friend and has done you many good turns including buying you kitchen appliances. Try to overlook his minor annoyances and learn to take pleasure in being his provider. No one is perfect.
If he's constantly asking you to pack more bowls ask him to pack one with the weed he brought, knowing he didn't bring any. Kind of passive aggressive but it gets the point across. Otherwise try having an open, honest conversation with him...
Some people just need to be told.. they don’t think it’s a big deal cuz they aren’t regular smokers. Therefore he’s not taking his regular manners into “getting high” because it sounds to me that to him it’s still all kinda new and he wants it to be a “thing” almost like getting drunk, but u gotta tell him bro. Can’t buy a bag with hope. Tell him that shit cost brody
My thoughts is he must actually have a high tolerance.. Impressive.. How about asking him if wants to buy a bag of weed? Tell him, "Hey man, I can get you a 1/4 for $60, you want some?" and then he will have some to pitch in, and then possibly start realizing the cost.. Or, maybe say something like "You know these bong bowls are $10 each right?" so he will realize holy shit I am burning up a lot of money.. Maybe blast him with cheap simpson oil some time to where he has had enough? Maybe just tell him that weed might not be for him because it's too expensive to get him high? "Shit bro, I'd quit smoking weed altogether if it cost me $30 to get a buzz, damn! Your tolerance is so great it's almost not worth it for you to smoke at all!!"'
Either that or he's not inhaling correctly. I mean he's not even clearing the bong, that's part of his hit he's just leaving behind...
