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HELP! Drug test. Please tell me if this plan sounds okay.

Discussion in 'Beginner Cannabis Consumption & Tips' started by MissShmoke, Sep 6, 2012.

  1. #1 MissShmoke, Sep 6, 2012
    I am absolutely a drug test taking apprentice.. I know the best way to pass is to stop & detox, but I just don't have enough time. I am a pretty heavy smoker, so it's quite unrealistic anyway. I was offered a job today & have to take the test tomorrow morning.. I'll tell you my plan & you tell me if it sounds okay or just stupid.

    Here we go..

    I'll be going to my friend's house in the morning to get her clean urine.. I'll then put it in a condom & put it in my underwear for warmth & safe keeping.. Will this be okay for heat? I can't imagine it being any warmer somewhere else, as I am a female. I'll then drive an hour to the drug testing facility with the clean urine in my underwear. I will put a safety pin somewhere on the inside of my shirt for quick opening.. fill the cup.. condom back in my underwear and safety pin back where I got it. I don't have much time, so I figure this is my best bet.

    Please, tell me what you think. Or any advice will be gladly accepted.
     
  2. #2 OddSkeleton, Sep 6, 2012
    If they watch you, you're burnt

    If they dont watch you, good plan :p
     
  3. #3 MissShmoke, Sep 6, 2012

    I've been there before for my current job, just a different location.. they didn't watch me the first time & I doubt they would anyway for an employment drug test! So, good! Thank you!
     
  4. #4 MissShmoke, Sep 7, 2012
    Bump!
     
  5. #5 irock1336, Sep 7, 2012
    i dont think employment drug tests watch you but just to be safe dillute the fuck out of ur piss about an hr and a half before the test and keep drinking water up untill the minute u take the test i did this and passed good luck!
     
  6. #6 bazoski1er, Sep 7, 2012
    Sounds good but I'd use something a bit thicker than a condom... don't want it to burst before you get there.

    A balloon maybe?
     
  7. #7 DreamPCs, Sep 7, 2012
    Do you have large breasts? My recommendation is to use a thin travel size shampoo bottle. You can most likely find it in your grocery store (or places like walmart). Fill it with your girlfriends piss and tuck it under your breast to stay warm. Standard pre employment drug tests are behind closed doors and no one is allowed to watch so you'll be good. The cups you pee into have a temperature gauge on them. What I did was piss into the cup, wait for the temperature to register properly, then drain the cup into the toilet and fill it with the substitute pee. I've done thia multiple times with nothing but success.
     
  8. #8 WeedMan On Fire, Sep 7, 2012
    these things people do to keep smoking weed. put the pipe down girl.
     
  9. #9 smokin bud, Sep 7, 2012
    This will work as long as your friends piss is clean. Once i borrowed a "clean friends" piss (i asked him if hes smoked recently he said not un months) but i can back positive for some unmentionables he took. This was in high school for a min wage job so i didnt care, but anyway good luck op.
     
  10. #10 MissShmoke, Sep 8, 2012
    She's definitely clean! I took the DT today. No one watched & it seemed to go fine! When I looked at the temp, it was green but cooling before I gave it to her but still green.

    If for some reason it wasn't hot enough, would she have had me retake it there?

    Everything seemed cool, she checked the temp, taped it, had me sign & sent me on my way!
     
  11. #11 MissShmoke, Sep 8, 2012
    That wasn't one of the options! Its not heroin, come on.. Alcohol is much worse for you. But I'm not here for counseling, ha.


    OKAY WEEDMAN?! :)
     
  12. #12 Juicy Jay Z, Sep 8, 2012
    Congrats on the drug test victory!
    Weedman, don't hate.

    Drug tests are unnecessary, imo.
     
  13. #13 MissShmoke, Sep 8, 2012

    definitely.. I mean, no one wants to hire a crackhead.. but weed.. it's just so stupid. but whatever, this isn't debate time! :)

    Thanks though, do you think she would have said something if the temperature was too low?
     
  14. #14 MissShmoke, Sep 8, 2012
    Does anyone know if they tell you right away if the temperature is too low?!
     
  15. #15 DreamPCs, Sep 8, 2012
    [quote name='"MissShmoke"']Does anyone know if they tell you right away if the temperature is too low?![/quote]

    The temp has to be between 90 and 100 degrees. Most places won't tell you if the temp wasn't correct but you have a fairly wide margin. As long as that last orb lit up you should be fine.
     
  16. #16 MissShmoke, Sep 8, 2012
    well, now I'm nervous! I think I'm just being paranoid.
     
  17. #17 MissShmoke, Sep 11, 2012
    Just realized, right on the paperwork she gave me it says 'yes' it was in between 90-100 degrees! So I'm golden! Wonderful. I was worried for nothin. :)
     
  18. #18 MissShmoke, Sep 14, 2012
    Officially passed. & not jobless. Hurray!
     

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