Has Weed Made Me Delusional ? ?

I'm 19, started growing and smoking at 15 , smoked about 5g a day every day all day until about 8 months ago I stopped so that I could get a job etc and get life back on track , I now have a girlfriend, job etc. And just started growing again but I feel like I'm just kidding myself and I really want to go to southern spain , sleep rough , and grow weed . Ill either find people that already grow weed or start my own farm . I have 10k english pounds saved up . Am I being stupid or shud I just follow my heart ? My head tells me its a stupid idea but I think about it every day and feel I would be soso hapy to be soso free . My parents said they would b cool with me going off to spain so there really is nothing stopping me other than I feel its so socially like unaxcepted . Ps. I'm not a loner , a wierdo or anything , I go out with my mates twice a week we go clubbing etc I'm a normal kid , but I feel like this life just isn't me and I don't want to keep pretending I'm someone that I'm not . I'm a happy at heart . What u guys think should I just go spain ? I'd rather be freezing cold searching for scraps of food than waking up at 6am and going to fu****g again . Its all so pointless and I don't care for material things at all really . I just want good friends , my health , a dog , and to enjoy the little things in life and do as I wish . What u guys think ? I'm not joking I'm being serious I want to go live in bushes etc and travel around smoking weed , even if I didn't have weed I would still love it just meeting new people and feeling free . What u guys think shud I do it ?

 

Btw I meant waking up at 6am and going to fu****g work , work is just a tedius boring worthless waste of time that we are told to do because we are told it will bring happiness . I would rather help others than earn 25k a year buying myself pointless sh*t like a new car and stuff that I really really do not need

 

Hahhaha its just some homegrown white widow mixed with sour d bho oil , and 8 beers . serious tho , shud I do it ?

 

Dark waves , I love u . Just texted my nan telling her I'm going to pop round hers tomorrow and talk about travelling plans I have . She used to live in spain so I'm going to ask her about healthcare etc and get the ball rolling . Modern life is too shallow , vein , tedius and boring for me . A motto I kind of made to live my life by is '' if you can't make a good movie out of your life once its over, you had a shit life '' weather that means you end up dead in a ditch somewhere in prison for the rest of your life, as long as it was an amazing time before that then it was so worth it . Btw I'm trying to say 'yolo' , I punch cu**s in the face that say yolo . Such a fag expression

 

I mean I'm NOT trying to say yolo , god I'm so fucking drunkhigh

 

Ye aznoodles , I think I just got to grow a pair of balls , man up , and do it . I been wanting to do this kind of thing ( not this exact spain thing ) since I was about 16 so that's 3 years . I don't really have a strong relationship with my parents so if I came home a bum they wouldn't help me out so I wouldn't bother asking .I would prefer to move over to cali or some other state with the same liberal weed laws and nice weather , but I'm from the uk so staying in the eu has a lot of advtages for me . If I went to the usa I'd b there illegally , despite I guess that wouldn't mater if I was living 'off the grid' as it were . I'm not afraid of crime either , I don't have a criminal record but if done a few bad things here and there and got warnings etc so if shit got real bad I could always rely on my 'dark side' haha , nothing cruel tho, just crime that has no victim .if everyone followed there dreams this world be such a cool place , or a complete worzone I guess haha . Stoners should come together and buy a tropical island and form a new country .thres probably enough people that wud want to di it haha Would b so dope . N e way I'm being ridiculous now haha . This forums so cool , full of so many like minded people . Would b dope if there was a grasscity rave or something . U guys supply the erb ill supply the molly

 

Yea man I've literallyt done like no plannings its that last month I was promoted to head chef at the resteraunt I work at , and I thought that would make me really happy , and it did for a couple weeks but now once again I feel really empty . I earn 25k a year , after tax I get about 19 grand a year with other expendetures and bonuses here and there , and I live at home still so have no bills to pay and that's how I have been able to save up 10 grand . The only problem with backpacking in the uk is that you can't really grow weed out here , well, I suppose you can , but I'm guessing it could b very difficult as our weather can b unpredictable . However I have seen friends grow 1 pound plants out here , planting in late may and harvesting in late september . I know its sad to have weed as such a vital part of my travelling plan but I do feel very strongly about it . Spain however , has soooooo many english people living there and is one of the best countries to grow erb . I live in london , in the south east of england so its one of the hottest parts of england I supose , and despite london can often get a bad reputation in certain areas such as brixton , peckham and general east london , its still a very safe city . And countryside is never far away . Weed prices here are good if your selling too , you can easily sell at ten uk pounds a gram in most places . I have 12 plants in veg indoor right now , I may take all of them out and plant them outside and if they seem to be doung well , leave home and look after the plants and then next year do it on a bigger yet not unrealistic scale . I'm very good at growing for my age so they have a good chance providing there are no harsh frosts in october / september . I think what I see of california etc on tv is better that what it really is in the real world . I shall plant them outdoors in a couple weeks once they are stronger . The best best thing would be to b able to grow weed consistantly in the uk outdoor , despite I probably have enoug money to rent a apartment and start doing an indoor operation but that is pretty risky . I have heared that green house seed company in amsterdam used to grow outdoor and they are at a higher latitude than me so on paper I can grow happily here . However for some reason all weed in uk is indoor grown . And in the uk its so easy to get benefits , which is like getting money from the government for no reason , so I'd always b safe . Cheers man , just typing all this on my phone is helping think evreything out for myself haha

 

Ye man I agree I haven't seen the whole world , however the people I hang around with aren't exactly the most we'll behaved people , ( hence I'm on this site growing weed ) , a lot of them have been into either juvinale prison or actual prison , and I myself up until about last year when I took my chef career seriously used to be a little bastard . I'm not saying I'm 'hard' or anyrhing but there are definatelt softer people out there , and I did live on my own for 4 months until I got kicked out my apartment because of complains from neighbours for noise , and having a dog which I was not allowed as part of my tenancy agreemant. So I am not blind to the fact that a lot of people are fu**ers but in the uk , its fairly easy to stay out of . Because I live in london its very easy to get involved with selling weed etc but you only have to move a few miles out to the middle claSs areas and its impossible to find trouble . I am not naïve at all . My only worry is that in my mind , and on paper , everythings seems like it would work out fine , more or less . However I have a gut feeling that something , some strange thing , would happen that would ruin my plans and make me want my old job back . I gues ill never know until I try . Ill go see my nan tomorrow and see what she thinks about it

 

And I forgot to say , I really apreciate your replies , I should take more time out to reply to others on this site rather than ask questions , cheers for your time mate

 

I definately don't need my car , its such a drain on my income becausof insurance and public transport here is , to be honest , amazing . Income ofcourse is needed however I figured I could sell wee, get odd jobs or bar jobs , seeing sa last year I worked weekends at a bar so I'm likely to be able to get another job. Then again I could just go on benefits from the government but I feel that's dirtier than going out robbing houses , claiming money off the government isn't my thing .despite they r fuc**s