Harpooned me a whale

Discussion in 'Real Life Stories' started by WhereRDaCookies, Nov 27, 2011.

  1. Yup went to a friends house last night to get messed up and play some video games. A few other people came over and left pretty quick after smoking on our bud, but we were having a good night getting messed up. I probably had one too many beers by the time his fiance came home with a friend.

    I ain't a bitch so I kept drinkin and smokin. My friend was getting ready to go to bed, but I hadn't finished my beer so I kept on keepin on. They tell us we need to fight for the couch and I went "OH FUCK, I'm going to fuck this fat chick aren't I..." and I was all like "NO DUDE! NO MORE FAT CHICKS! YOU HIT YOUR QUOTA THIS YEAR ALREADY" (quota = 3) Don't really know what her name was but like 30 minutes later I was in the middle of getting a bj while hitting my pipe.

    All in all I was pretty drunk, but impressed by how she moved. Even a lot of the better looking girls I've been with just didn't know what the fuck they were doing.

    If you've had a whaling adventure of your own while intoxicated feel free to share :D.
  2. Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!
  3. Are we talking chub chub fat or her elbow looks like a crater on the moon fat?
  4. #4 WhereRDaCookies, Nov 27, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 27, 2011
    Eh somewhere in between. I was pretty hammered...lets just say bigger than what I would accept while sober haha. I'm not really a fan of fat chicks. They make your junk feel smaller. I will say this though. I never had that feeling of "Are those vagina flaps or fat flaps that my dick is inside of?" Which is a problem I've experienced in the past.

  5. That's pussy shit man I fucking shot a koala bear out of the ocean with a cross bow now that's some Eskimo shit homie.
  6. Last summer at a party i fucked a girl who looked like pearl from spongebob, no lie man, exactly like her.
  7. Yeah fat bitches...
    I've got too many story's similar to yours.
    Ranging from just a little extra baby fat to "Oh shit, she might debo you for a snack" fat.
    I don't know what to talk about.

  8. This what happens when you respond to the Post Title and not the Post itself lmao.
    It's cool though, you got Ro in your avatar.
  9. hahahaha; omg that had me dying,.
  10. Fuck omg lololahahahahaha
  11. This shit is funny as hell. If I could +rep on mobile I would.

  12. http://files.sharenator.com/fuck_yeah_RE_Not_the_sexy_post_Id_promised_but-s400x317-164482-535.jpg

  13. [​IMG]
  14. XD I also dumped a beer all over my best friends Skyrim guide so theres another $20 fuckin bucks.
  15. Download one and print it out.
  16. I've fucked one fat chick in my life and it was just for the sake of fucking a fat chick. Met the chick that night and pinned her within hours. Horrible experience. But at least I got my chubby belt.
  17. @RunningRiot
    Did it stink?
    I think that's the trend here.
  18. Not all fat chicks have smelly vaginas. Its the cleanliness of the person not their weight that causes fish stank. Hell..I boned a fat chick one time that really had a thing for me. I really should have dated the girl actually. She liked me for me, and not because I tried to act a certain way. Definitely regret letting her get knocked up by a douchebag who treats her like shit.
  19. #19 AMEX Accepted, Nov 27, 2011
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 27, 2011
    So so so based.
    Woo woo
    #Sig worthyness

  20. fuckin marry me Exodus. Seriously..

    epic epic post

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