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Guide to Not Get Caught Toking

Discussion in 'Apprentice Marijuana Consumption' started by ehmm ayche, Jul 20, 2010.

  1. Well GC, my personal favorite section on this site, by far is the real life stories. However, there are always alot of threads about getting caught, be it by your parents, school, police or other. In an attempt to put an end to these stories because they are always the same, I am going to write a guide with my personal methods as well as any other tips i can think, feedback is very welcomed, just be positive.

    Smoking at Home

    Smoking in your house can be very tricky, especially if your parents are very uptight about you smoking pot or if they dont know. By training yourself to be silent, responsible, and patient you can go a while without getting caught. I say a while because no matter how hard you try, there is always a chance of someone walking in on you when you least expect it.

    Get to know your house's paterns

    Human nature causes us to repeat things daily, these become habits rituals, etc. Paying attention to what goes on in your household can mean the difference between having 30 seconds to hide your stuff and having 5 seconds to hide your stuff. If you learn the habits/paterns of the people in your house you can easily mold your smoking times around those. Also pay attention to details like the sounds of foot steps, I can easily distinguish the sound of my sister's footsteps from my mom's, meaning if I hear my sister coming towards my room, no big deal, if I hear my mom, hide everything.

    Get a reliable smoking piece

    This can come down to prefferance, be sure to only use bubblers, bongs, vapes, and pipes in your house as joints and blunts leave a smoke trail that is very noticeable. I preffer a small metal pipe, the reason for this being, the bowl is perfectly flat on the top, so it can be covered effectively with a coin between hits so the smoke doesnt escape and leave a smell behind. Glass bowls, because they are made by hand, are not always perfectly flat on the top so when you cover it you have some smoke that escapes, and it doesnt take much to leave a lingering smell. The reason I don't like bongs or bubblers is because they are loud. The sound of the bubbling has previously gotten me caught because I thought it was negligeable when really it was much louder than I realised.

    Make a Sploof

    A sploof is a great tool to have in your smoking arsenal, it can make the most sketchy places a great smoking spot if you are alone. Essentially what it is, is a tube filled with something perfumy that will mask the smell of pot. I make mine with 3 things, an old toilet paper roll, a bunch of dryer sheets and an elastic. Simply cover one end of the tube with a dryer sheet, keep it in place with the elastic and finally stuff the toilet paper roll with dryer sheets until you can't pack anymore in. You then exhale your hit through the tube and out a window and there will be no smell if done properly. You can make them other ways such as filling a water bottle with a hole in the bottom with dryer sheets and toilet paper, the toilet paper will actually absorb the smoke and if you have enough of it in the bottle no smoke will come out of the end.

    Become Sam Fisher

    If you are like me, most of your smoking at home will be done at night. At night, your house can become quite silent, so sounds travel much further since there is less interference that will mute it. You have to become stealth. Try to limit the amount that you move around your room, floors can be quite noisy, so if you begin to move around alot, more noise will be made. If you think it's safer for you, turn on some music on low, this will mute the sounds coming from your room somewhat, but at the same time you wont be able to hear if someone is comming towards your room. Dont leave your light on way later than usual, as this can attract attention, putting a towel under your door can solve this problem but what I do is I have a little reading lamp that I turn on instead, the light is faint enough so it's not noticed. For my lighter, because making any noise at night makes my paranoid, I have a candle lit that I put on my desk where I smoke, like that you dont flick it every time, you just press the gas and its lit.

    Extra do's and dont's
    • Do keep a light air freshener in your room at all times, not something too smelly though, that can attract attention
    • Do keep your stash hidden somewhere where it will be silent to grab
    • Do cover your bowl something to not leave a smoke trail
    • Do check 15 minutes after smoking that your room is smell free and nothing is laying around
    • Do have somewhere to ash your bowl for example: an empty popcan
    • Don't strive from your method, meaning dont get too comfortable with smoking at home, that is when you start to leave clues to others about what you are doing which can lead to trouble
    • Don't become overly paranoid, if you were safe with your procedure, everything is fine
    • Don't smoke in your house if you know there will be horrible outcomes, ie: getting kicked out
    • Don't go against your gut, if you feel like something is going to go wrong, stop what you are doing, put everything away, get high some other time
    Smoking Outdoors

    When smoking outside, your main enemy is not the police, it is people around you. While yes, the police can come and arrest you, it is the pedestrians, the neighbors, the drivers, basicly everyone around that will be who you are hiding from, because they are the ones that call the police with your description and location.

    Finding a Spot

    Your smoking spot should obviouslybe away from anywhere that is heavily trafficked, areas with more people have more cop patrols and obviously, more people that are against weed. If you are lucky and live somewhere whree there is a forest or something, don't even hesitate, its the best place to smoke. However if you live in an urban area it is much more difficult to find a good place to toke. In cities, what I have found to be the best places to go are fields, like as in a park, a soccer field, just a big open space. Try finding a place away from people where you have a view of everyone around you, so you can see if someone is coming. But basicly, if you were to sit in the middle of a soccer field, you should be far away from anyone that could smell your tree aswell as be able to see if you are smoking. If you do the soccer field thing, have a ball or a frisbee, like that if a cop approaches you just say you are taking a break in the grass. The field gives you the advantage of nobody being able to sneak up on you, as you have a 360 view of everything for a considerable distance.

    What to Smoke

    Once you have found your spot, figure out what you feel comfortable with smoking. First, figure out how safe you are from the public, if you are visible to a street, bongs are out of the question since they are much easier to spot. If you have a really horrible spot, but there really is nothing else, roll a joint, if you are 30 yards away from someone, they will probably just think it is a cigarette as long as they can't smell it. Hell, ive smoked joints in full parking lots without ever even getting a second glance. Pipes can be easily concealed if they are small enough to wrap your hand around them. My personal preference is pipes for any spot that is less than foolproof (if it is fool proof i'll use a bong) because as I said, you can conceal it easily and it smells much less than a joint.

    After Toke

    After you have smoked, dont be an idiot. If you run around acting like a douche, you will most likely be disturbing pretty much everyone. I've worked at Taco Bell and not gonna lie, holy fuck newb stoners are annoying as shit when they are in there. Keep yourself focused on what you are doing don't just run wild in the streets. When police see behaviour like that, they note it, and then when they update their patroles, they may decide to cover the area that you and your friends were being fucktards, then your spot can get comprimised and you end up in trouble. Basicly: Dont be a dick.

    Extra Do's and Dont's
    • Do light a smoke if you are smoking out in public, if asked by police what you guys are soing, you can say "having a smoke"​
    • Do be courteous to everyone around you, if someone sees 6 teenagers walking towards a hidden area, they become suspicious, if you say hi and flash a smile or just chat a bit, they are more likely to look the other way​
    • Do constant checks with your surroundings​
    • Don't go near schools or main roads as those are much more heavily patroled by police​
    • Don't be loud when smoking, it attracts attention to you​

    Smoking at School

    Just straight up don't do it, you'll get caught and ruin your life, its not worth it. Smoke before and after and NEVER keep stuff in your locker
     
  2. Nice post!!! I never smoked at school... Lot of people would get caught and their life was just jacked up after that. We just normally left the school premises at lunch and then come back high....
     
  3. We smoked in the photography dark room at school last year cause its so well ventilated and no one really goes in there. Haha good times
     
  4. Heres my guide:

    Don't give a fuck. If you get caught you get caught. Smoking and worrying about being caught/taking all these extra steps kills the fun. Believe me, I've done the whole stealth smoking thing before, and I've been caught. Its not worth the extra effort.
     

  5. Well, if that works for you, great. I however would like to be able to have a clean criminal record and smoke weed, this guide is an aide as to not have that happen, which i am sure alot of people will apreciate. And it really isin't much extra effort, i mean if i toke without being stealth a sesh takes me like 10 minutes, while being stealth, maybe 13 if im slow
     
  6. Ya, there are a lot of things that I do now that just seem so common sense so that I dont get caught...
     
  7. smoking next to a window with a fan blowing the smoke out of the room helps a lot. one time i smoked at my friends house without a fan, and it make the fire alarm go off.
     
  8. Here is my foolproof method for not getting caught:

    1. Study hard.
    2. Turn 18.
    3. Get a job.
    4. Move out and get your own place.

    Works EVERY time!!! :eek:
     
  9. Or smoke weed for the right reasons: medically.
     
  10. ^there are no "right reasons" man.

    Anyway here is my guide

    Step 1
    Have dealer meet you at your place

    Step 2
    Smoke at your place
     
  11. Parents catch you smoking a joint? Look them in the eyes and finish like a beast.
     

  12. You cant milk this post forever man
     
  13. Are you challenging me dear sir? Them are fighting words.
     

  14. [​IMG]
     
  15. Great guide man. As an additional tip, try to see if your parents will let you light incense in your room. It 's pretty easy to cover the smell with it, as long as you cover the bowl with a coin and blow it out the window n all that.
     
  16. if your smoking a bong or bubbler inside remember it makes noise

    if your trying to cover up the smell inside, go with a few candles or an incense, if your out of everything light a few matches near the door and blaze out the window, so if anyone comes in they smell that.

    also air freshener, somebody would probablhy keep sniffing because it smells nice then they would see your red eyes and huge pupils and you could be busted. in my experience incense drives my mom out


    and btw if your gonna buy some incense, use it the first few times and dont smoke to see how your parents act
     
  17. Instead of smoking if your house you can just step outside or make a lightbulb vap. I have great experience with the lightbulb vap. You can get high every night, no smell and use can use the same 1g nug like 15 times instead of 3 or 5.
     

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